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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29106699">Crimson + Wonderland</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/FraustiNoSnowman/pseuds/FraustiNoSnowman'>FraustiNoSnowman</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Minecraft (Video Game)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst?, DreamSMP - Freeform, Emotions, Fantasy, M/M, Other, Short Story, gay love :), occasional smut in occasional scenes</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-31</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 14:16:06</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>39,022</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29106699</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/FraustiNoSnowman/pseuds/FraustiNoSnowman</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Two unrelated novels mashed into one, my style.<br/>Crimson is a DSMP headcanon<br/>Wonderland is a fictional AU. George has a dream, but is it really a dream?</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Clay | Dream/GeorgeNotFound, Clay | Dream/GeorgeNotFound (Video Blogging RPF)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>14</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Crimson</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>I have no idea how AO3 works at all help.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>—Crimson—</p><p>“Dream, we need you to help.” </p><p>The man in the corner of the black, steaming prison cell didn’t even flinch. He hadn’t heard that name in months... years..? He couldn’t remember. </p><p>“Dream.” </p><p>Dream turned his head slightly so that he could see whoever was there — not because he didn’t know who the visitor was. He was too familiar with that voice to ever forget. </p><p>“Dream, we need your help.” Sapnap said again, this time it was a little more than a whisper. </p><p>Dream coughed slightly. He hasn’t used his vocal cord for so long that he had forgotten how to talk. </p><p>“What makes you think I will help you... or what makes you think that I can help you?” Dream asked. He adjusted his position so his forehead touched the obsidian walls. The chains on his wrists scraped against his skin, peeling the scabs open again. He winced. Dream didn’t want to get out. He was growing attached to the lectern, the clock on the wall, the stench of his own blood and sweat, the heat from the lava flowing nonstop outside, and the sound of his chains echoing in the room over and over again. </p><p>Someone came into the room. Why did Dream not hear the sound of the bridge? Maybe it was because it never went, or that the other person has been there for the whole time, or that he just locked out the sounds of the outside. He couldn’t tell but it didn’t matter. </p><p>It was Sam. He hasn’t visited in while either, although Dream didn’t want to see Sam either. The Warden gently tapped Sapnap on the shoulder as if to calm him down. </p><p>“Dream,” Sapnap started again. Dream couldn’t how his name was being repeated, over and over again like a chant of a weird cult of some sort. “The egg... it-“</p><p>“If you plan on speaking to me, stop stuttering and actually fucking say something.” Dream didn’t think he would snap but he did. He did not regret it though. </p><p>Sapnap flinched as Dream suddenly spoke. He took a deep breathe. </p><p>“Dream, it’s George. They got him.”</p><p>None of them expected Dream to suddenly jump and turn to pounce on Sapnap. Not even Dream did. He was weaker than he had been when he came into this prison; his legs shook violently at the sudden motion — his vision blurred and black dots appeared in front of his eyes. Sapnap held Dream lightly, stabling him but Dream pulled himself away. </p><p>Something was burning in his eyes. He couldn’t tell if it was tears or anger or anything else. At this point it didn’t matter anymore. </p><p>“Please, Dream. We’re helpless.” Sapnap whispered again, this time softer and quieter but straight into Dream’s ears. </p><p>“Get me out. Now,” Dream turned his head slightly to look at the man who guarded his cell. “Get me out. Give me my axe, my armor, my sword, my shield. Get me out, get me out.” He had said every single letter through his teeth as if he was planning to eat Sapnap and Sam alive. </p><p>Sam nodded as Sapnap gently let go of Dream. </p><p>“Follow me.” Sam said. Dream followed, wrists still aching but it didn’t matter. There was more important things on his mind. </p><p>—</p><p>He hasn’t seen the moon in a while. It had turned dark red when Dream was still in prison, thinking about manipulating Ranboo, or scribbling on some of the books. </p><p>The outside looked different too, not only was everything covered in blood vines, but there were massive holes and cracks in the ground as if someone bombed the Earth like what Dream had done to L’Manberg, only worse. This time the wounds have left scars. </p><p>He had attempted to see through Ranboo’s eyes. Sometimes he’s get close, almost breaking into Ranboo’s fragile, precious little mind, but it never worked as well as Dream had intended. He had been struggling with that. But one day, the connection between their brains had completely stopped. Dream couldn’t remember when exactly that happened. He had thought it was because they had somehow found out a way to block Dream out... but looking at the ground...</p><p>He couldn’t help but ask Sapnap, who still has his hand on Dream’s shoulder, as if helping him and keeping him hostage at the same time, the question which emerged to the surface when he saw the vines. “What happened to Ranboo?” </p><p>Sapnap looked to Dream. He paused for a second and said “he died to my- Bad for going against the Egg.” </p><p>No wonder. Dream thought. </p><p>“Why would you ask?” Sam asked. </p><p>Dream could only bring himself to say “I’m sorry.” He meant it, although it didn’t make sense for him to be.  </p><p>Sapnap looked towards Dream. “You-“ He stopped mid-sentence.</p><p>Thank you. Dream thought. He couldn’t bring himself to think about what he had done. </p><p>Long ago he had abandoned his friends, his pets, his house, his memories, and all the things which made him “himself” in exchange for power, the power to keep order and law to keep the place together, to glue the hearts of the people together so no one will betray another. </p><p>L’Manberg was the trigger. </p><p>It was the thought that the people said that the Dream SMP nation wasn’t free. </p><p>Freedom, love, pursuit. </p><p>And when Johnathan Schlatt became the president, Dream tried to pull him towards the nation again, and that way they would be together again. </p><p>But Schlatt didn’t. He had his own views. As much as a bastard Schlatt was, he had his own version of justice and freedom which also told Dream that this wasn’t going to work. </p><p>When Wilbur had blown the country up and suicided Dream then thought the people will be back together again, and the person who pulled them apart had died; but he didn’t expect Tubbo, not Tommy, nor everyone else. </p><p>He sold himself, his face, and his identity to a God and a Demon just because he wanted everyone to be back together like they used to be — and when everyone’s sole purpose was to defeat him, he felt that again, but victory kissed him bitterly on the cheek, and from then on his power faded too. He had reached his goal but the price..?</p><p>—</p><p>Nightmare weighed differently. Dream could feel it in every single blow at each zombie, skeleton, and people. There were bruises and gashes everywhere on his body. His right sleeve was entirely torn off by a massive spider that had somehow found a time to attack and left two eye-sized holes in his arm; the wound oozed a purple liquid, and Dream knew he couldn’t last any longer.</p><p>Before they launched themselves into the battle again, Sapnap had warned Dream of the dangers and told him that Bad kept George in the cellars where the Egg once was and asked Dream to bring George out, to save him, or at least let him see Dream one last time. Dream knew it was time to see George — the once-to-be king, monarch, friend, and family.</p><p>Someone slashed at Dream with a sword when Dream was in thought. He couldn’t escape the blow and it hit him in the shoulder, barely missing Dream’s ear. He whirled around and saw a humanoid cat: Ant, although he was barely how Dream remembered him to look like. His blue, sparkling, starlike eyes were replaced by what remotely resembled blood gems and there were streaks of red hair all across his body as if he had doused himself with blood before he came to cut Dream’s throat with his claws and drink his blood.</p><p>“Ant...” Dream couldn’t help but take a deep breathe in. </p><p>“Die for the Egg, Dream.” He almost said it mockingly, as if it wouldn’t take a single bit of effort to take Dream down. He was right.</p><p>Dream did not have the energy to raise Nightmare again, neither did he have the courage to face Ant, to face his... former friend and at least try to harm hin more than he had already. </p><p>“I’m so sorry, Ant.”</p><p>He dropped his axe and ran. </p><p>—</p><p>He needed to find George.</p><p>Left. Right. </p><p>His left foot was definitely twisted, if not broken already. Each step, pain shot up his leg all the way to his waist as if he was shot by a crossbow bolt three times, each tipped in poison.</p><p>Right turn again. Straight ahead.</p><p>He couldn’t swing his arm. The spider certainly had more on its fangs than what spiders typically had. It might’ve been part of the Eggpire too, something Skeppy would’ve come up with to please Bad.</p><p>It was cold.</p><p>A left turn. </p><p>There was an open door leading to the chamber as if it was welcoming Dream into it. </p><p>The room was somehow brightly lit even when most of the torches that were once there burnt out. On the furthest corner, where the Egg used to be, was a wooden wall which appeared to be placed there purposefully out of place. </p><p>Dream walked closer, dragging his foot along with him. He was exhausted, but at least Ant had left him long ago.</p><p>The wall was showered with blood, some fresh and the other ones old. There were signs of battle on the brick floor — broken shields, some swords... Dream could pick out some of the more familiar weapons like his old crossbow with the initials of the Dream Team etched onto the handle. </p><p>D G S.</p><p>Dream. George. Sapnap.</p><p>It was lying in a corner somewhere. The strings had been intentionally whipped off as if someone was breaking it on purpose, to let out anger, to scream.</p><p>He walked closer, his foot more than a throbbing pain and he could feel his hands turning cold.</p><p>Some books were lying on the ground. Dream knelt on one knee to pick one up. It was Ranboo’s diary titled “do not look”. He flipped open the first page and saw a “:)” Dream had written a while ago to manipulate Ranboo. He had hoped that Ranboo would listen. It was his only hope. </p><p>He couldn’t read more of that anymore. It reminded him of what he had done and how much happiness he had deprived from the people’s hearts because of a selfish thought of bringing everyone together so he could look at them and say “they are happy” when they are not.</p><p>A step more forward. A groan.</p><p>“Who are you,” a voice more than familiar said. “Have you come to end me?”</p><p>Dream’s eyes widened. For a moment he couldn’t bring himself to move his lips and shout the name.</p><p>“George!” He turned to see George on the wooden wall. Dream’s heart hit the ground when he caught sight of his old friend.</p><p>George was pinned onto the wall, like Jesus had been. His torso was dangling in midair as he had no strength left to keep himself straight; George’s frail legs, both looking like they have been broken, were swinging freely under him, barely touching the ground. He didn’t open his eyes. He was too tired to do so.</p><p>“Please kill me. Don’t use his voice, don’t use his footsteps, don’t try and tell me that he somehow came out of that jail cell to save me...” George whimpered. “Don’t give me hope. Just kill me...”</p><p>Tears gushed out of Dream’s eyes: tears of anger, hate, and sadness; he reached up and tore the wooden spikes out of George’s bloody hands and held him in his arms before gently resting him on the ground. </p><p>His eyes were still shut even when Dream’s warm tears fell onto George’s bloodied hands, but Dream didn’t care anymore. He just held onto George, softly.</p><p>“George. I’m here. I am here. I’m sorry. I’m sorry—“ Dream whispered as he cried into George’s tattered shoulder. He felt a tear on his shoulder too, warm, comforting.</p><p>“Dream, it’s a trap... it’s a trap.” George answered back.</p><p>Time seemed to past slowly when Dream felt a sharp blade pierce through the skin on his back, the same place where Punz stabbed him, but the other way. He held George closer, shielding him from what was there behind Dream.</p><p>“It’s over, Dream.” The voice was dead cold. There was not a single trace of emotion. </p><p>Dream gripped onto George’s back. “Why.” He asked.</p><p>It was someone else who replied. Bad. </p><p>“The Egg has it’s enemies,” Bad said in his iconic voice. “You’re the last piece of the puzzle, Dream. Your friend was a necessary sacrifice we had to make.”</p><p>“Shut the fuck up,” Dream shouted at his best volume. It wasn’t much. He was loosing too much blood. “Why?”</p><p>He had meant this question for the other, for the person who spoke up first, to the person who stabbed him in the back.</p><p>“Why?” The person replied. “The Egg doesn’t break promises, Dream, you should know better.”</p><p>He pushed the blade in further. </p><p>“Where were you when we needed you the most, Dream? Where were you when George and I needed you to stay? What were you doing then? Oh I forgot, you were the one who hurt us the most, it was you who brought this place downhill, who burned it all down!” Sapnap spat out the last words at Dream.</p><p>“Then why did you hurt him?” Dream whimpered. “Why did you hurt him if you cared about him?”</p><p>Sapnap snarled “I’ve given him up for the Egg.”</p><p>Dream’s vision turned darker. He could see dark spots like moths in the corner of his vision. He wanted to cry, to shout, and if he could, he would gladly kill himself if God would allow time to turn back and let things happen differently. </p><p>Sapnap had drawn out the sword from Dream’s back. He had never been cold and hot at the same time, the new wound radiating with heat, hotter than the lava, but the rest of his body was stone cold. </p><p>“Goodbye, Dream. Goodbye, George,” Sapnap kneeled down and whispered. “It was never, ever meant to be.”</p><p>The last thing he felt was George’s frail hands rising to cover up the wound.</p><p>“I’m sorry, George.” </p><p>“It’s alright, Dream.”</p><p>“Goodnight, George.”</p><p>“Goodnight.”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Wonderland Pt.1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Pt. 1 of Wonderland :)</p><p>Nothing too special about this, just... enjoy &lt;3</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>If he had the choice, he would’ve taken the step anyways.</p><p>—</p><p>He fell but he didn’t know how long he fell for, neither could he tell what he fell past: only colors, which he couldn’t see properly either not because of bad memory but because of his colorblindness...</p><p>Or was it?</p><p>The sky was purple. He knew it because he could see it. He usually couldn’t see that color — it was supposed to be blue regardless. He looked past his feet, which were embraced by a carpet of flowers and grass of different colors. Green, a lively color. He had never seen that color either.</p><p>A shadow whizzed behind him. Once. Twice. Once more. He twirled around over and over again to catch sight of what it was. He couldn’t tell.</p><p>He immediately tensed up, knowing that something was coming, and it was for his head or his neck. His calfs prepared to make a run forward into the unknown forest. Strange, he couldn’t help but notice that the trees were an odd shade of blue, his favorite color, but by no means colors for trees. </p><p>He felt a hand grab onto his wrist; he wanted to scream, but another hand covered his mouth too. No brute force — that person didn’t want him to die, yet.</p><p>“Shhhh, come with me.” The person behind whispered as he dragged him deeper into the forest. He soon let go of him, but he followed anyway. </p><p>His heart told him to “trust” and that’s what he did.</p><p>—</p><p>They finally stopped. The person had brought him into a cave of some sort. Inside are curtains on the ground and carpets covering the entrance. </p><p>“This definitely does not hide anywhere from anyone.” He thought. But somehow he felt safe. </p><p>The curtains he laid his feet on were pure gray, without a speck. Strange yet familiar, as if he had seen them before, though his memory told him that there was more to that — there should be claw marks on the curtains, there should be sunlight. He dismissed the thoughts after a brief moment as he could not trace the origins. </p><p>The person spoke, waking him up from his thoughts and thrusting him back into the real world. </p><p>“What are you doing here?” Both of them looked confused. The person looked eerily familiar as if they have met before. He had a white, ceramic mask hanging on his left ear; it was weathered as if it had been out there since the beginning of a century and was suddenly picked up by the man in front of him. The man had dirty blond hair long enough to cover his eyes if they were wet but were neatly combed mostly to one side; his eyes were… green. He hadn’t really seen anything that green before; in fact, he didn’t recall seeing any of that color. Must be a hallucination…</p><p>“God,” The man frowned slightly. “Am I wrong?” </p><p>He was confused. What was he talking about?</p><p>“What do you mean?” He replied with utter confusion in his voice. He wasn’t sure about anything, whether if it was what the man was asking or where they were or…</p><p>The man gripped onto his shoulders strong enough to slightly bruise him. He flinched. </p><p>“What’s your name?” It was not a question but more of an order. </p><p>“It’s…” He searched his mind as if searching a deep, dark chest in an old cellar. It was there, but when he reached out his hand to search it, it disappeared in front of his eyes like it was made out of mist and ashes. “Oh…” His heart dropped. </p><p>“What I thought.” The man didn’t look surprised. </p><p>The masked man gently let go of him, who was, by that point, scrambling to figure out what he had remembered — or what he had forgotten. He collapsed onto the ground, tailbone hitting the hard, rocky ground. </p><p>“Who am I?” He thought to himself. </p><p>The masked man kneeled down and put a comforting hand on his wrist, this time much lighter. </p><p>“Calm down,” he said. “It’s not a big deal. We can fix it.”</p><p>“What do you mean ‘we?’” He questioned. “Do you even know me?” </p><p>The man frowned once more like knowing him was common sense. For a second he questioned if that question was legitimate. </p><p>“Should I know you?” He asked. </p><p>The masked man nodded briefly. “Yes, you should. Unless you’re not real either.”</p><p>“Either?” He didn’t think he’d say it out loud. </p><p>“Either. But I think you are,” The man replied. “Call me… call me ‘Dream’, for now.” </p><p>Dream. </p><p>—</p><p>He had fallen asleep shortly after that conversation. In the dream, he was in a room by himself. Everything looked slightly weird. There were a cat and a dog, both lying peacefully beside him like pillows. There was a window, but there was thick mist covering the panes so he could not see. Only sunlight passed through the mist and into the room — that was the only source of light. In the dream, he felt obligated to rise and sit in front of a desk, in front of a large black screen and open something. In front of the desk, he would spend most of his day, and at about midnight he would fall back to the bed again, repeating the cycle. In the dream, he fell asleep again. </p><p>“Hey,” He was awoken by the sound of someone back in the cave. “Good morning. I figured you should be up by now.” </p><p>“Good morning, Dream.” He replied. </p><p>Dream carried a small box of berries in his hands. Now that there was more light, he could see Dream better. Small scars tattered across his skin along with freckles, which combined looked a little like stars on a peaceful night. He wore a pair of black, fingerless gloves. They only showed his fingers which at this point was covered in berry juice. </p><p>“Good morning. Are you hungry?” Dream asked. </p><p>He nodded in reply and stood up. Dream rested the box on a piece of rock that resembled a counter and went outside again. </p><p>“I’ll be getting water. Be right back.” Dream said before lifting the carpet which covered the entrance and left. The golden light from outside shone onto Dream’s bright green cape and reflected into his eyes, temporarily blinding him. </p><p>He took a deep breath in. He hadn’t done so ever since Dream helped him get away from whatever was following him. He had been too nervous to do anything, and even though the situation now was by no means safe, he could at least taste the air. It was… sweet, and not just because of the berries. The forest air smelled almost sickeningly sweet. And it wasn’t just the smell of perfumes, but of all the sweets, sugar, fruits, and nectar combined into a distinct smell. He didn’t find it too pleasing. </p><p>He started humming. There was no tune in particular in mind, but he just wanted to hum something to clear his mind of the strangeness, and maybe by then he would be able to remember at least the slightest bit about himself, about why he’s here, or where he should be. </p><p>At least a sound of a song comforted him.</p><p>“What’s that song called?” Dream’s voice broke the soft tune into pieces. He didn’t mind it though. Dream’s appearance didn’t seem wrong. </p><p>“I don’t know.” He admitted. </p><p>Dream had put the mask which was hanging lazily hanging from the side of his head onto his face, but he could tell that Dream was somehow confused. </p><p>“I just thought it sounded familiar.” He admitted to Dream. </p><p>It was true, as he hummed more of the song, it seemed to pour into his head like waves on a shore. He felt as if he was waddling in an elusive mist of memory which he couldn’t catch but was drowning in it. </p><p>—</p><p>????????</p><p>“-, what are you thinking?”</p><p>“-?”</p><p>“Yeah?”</p><p>“You blanked out for a second, are you alright?”</p><p>“Yeah. It’s a dream that I’ve been having lately.”</p><p>“You want to talk about it?” </p><p>“Nah, it’s fine.”</p><p>Lights flashed in front of his eyes, but he knew they weren’t real.</p><p>—</p><p>They had left the cave hours ago. Dream said something about helping him, and he accepted it without a single piece of doubt in his heart. He didn’t know why, but something deep inside him told him “it’s fine, he wouldn’t hurt you.” </p><p>He truly believed in it, and he will. </p><p>Dream walked in front of him with a dagger in his hand as if ready to pounce on any suspicious monster any second while he walked slightly slower with some supplies; he does not know how to fight. </p><p>Like a small little shy rabbit protected by a careful predator. He couldn’t make out the meaning behind that. </p><p>A part of the scene whispered to him that if Dream wanted to snap his neck, he most absolutely could, and would. It tingled in the back of his neck. </p><p>Once, twice, thrice. </p><p>Dream noticed his frown, somehow, and stopped mid-road to look deeply into his eyes. Even though Dream’s mask covered his eyes, they seemed to stare straight into his soul. He had lowered his dagger so that it was pointing to the leaf-littered forest floor, reflecting the canopy light onto the root of a purple-barked tree like a clear mirror. </p><p>“I won’t kill you,” Dream seemed to read his mind. “I won’t.”</p><p>He didn’t know what to say or how to reply. “I know. I wasn’t thinking about that.”</p><p>“Don’t lie to me, -“ He sounded like he was about to say something he would regret saying. “I can, in all seriousness, see.” </p><p>“What do you mean?”</p><p>“My eyes look straight into you.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Feel free to give me ideas, praise, criticism... whatever :)<br/>Hope you have a good day!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Wonderland Pt.2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Ditto :)</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It was just about when the sun had set that they saw the end of the forest. More sunlight shone from the blue leaves onto the ground, tinting the floor with warm shade of… red. He should not know that color that well, yet it felt familiar, like his world should be colorful.</p><p>Dream had told him that they were going to search for answers, whether if they seem like they could be answered or not. He said that there was a castle filled with people who knew. </p><p>“But,” He started. There was nothing in sight other than a large field of flowers and tall grass, the trees if he looked behind into the forest which sheltered him for a mere night, and a purple, red sky; he couldn’t help but wonder where to go onwards. “Where are we going now? I… I see no castle.”</p><p>“I don’t know.” Dream replied.<br/>He was confused — how can they go somewhere you didn’t know the direction and coordinates of? How would they ever get there, without dying somehow out of thirst, tiredness, those “shadows” that Dream saved him from…</p><p>“It’s alright,” Dream said. “There are more… things in this place than you will think. Sooner enough you will be able to remember.” </p><p>He nodded in response despite not understanding a word Dream said. </p><p>“C’mon.” Dream held out his hand back to hold onto his. He accepted it, and they started walking across the tall grass field, hand in hand as if afraid to lose each other. Even though he had only met Dream a few hours ago, he felt like he knew him for years, or centuries. </p><p>The soil under his soles felt different to that in the forest. Everything was wetter, like somewhere familiar. The wind carried scents from flowers; he could recognize a few: tulips, roses, and what smells like either jasmine or clove, which he recalled to grow on trees, not small plants, but not a single blooming tree was in sight. Weird, he thought. He did not dislike the smell at all, it all was soothing, as if keeping something invisible from crushing him from all directions. </p><p>Dream gripped onto his hand tighter. It was unnecessary at that point, because Dream was tall and could clearly be spotted from meters away even when they lost each other’s hands. Nonetheless they were stuck together like velcro, hanging tight on. </p><p>Because Dream walked in front, he parted away all the grass so that none of them hit his face. He was thankful for that; he wouldn’t be able to get those away from his face — it did not help since Dream held onto one hand and the supplies were held in the other. </p><p>He could hear Dream panting slightly. He couldn’t tell why.</p><p>“I’m alright.” Dream spoke before him. </p><p>“Oh,” He thought. “I forgot he could see my thoughts.” </p><p>“It’s… not a big deal,” Dream continued. “I feel something.”</p><p>A tingly feeling shot up his spine. He couldn’t help but think about what the “something” was. Yet he was compelled to stay silent, so he did. </p><p>—</p><p>They needed a place to stay, and quick, because it was colder than they thought it was going to be without the wall of stone and trees turning away the wind. Dream pointed to a small dirt hill with two lanky trees: that would do for the night. </p><p>“It looks like us. See, they’re holding hands too.” Dream smiled. The two, lean trees had joining branches too. He smiled at that thought. </p><p>“It does, kind of.” He replied. </p><p>They quickly jogged towards the hill, still holding hands in the process. Dream wouldn’t let go, even when he was substantially slower than Dream was, obviously so because of their difference in height, and build. </p><p>He was barely taller than Dream’s shoulder and almost a third skinnier. Dream acted like his older brother, though he never remembered having one. </p><p>“How old are you, Dream?” He blurted out while panting. He didn’t mean to say it out loud, and it wouldn’t do him any good as he himself did not know his own age. Dream stayed silent until they arrived at the base of the hill and under the trees. He then let go of his hand. It was turning red because they held hands for so long; his hands had the marks of Dream’s fingers and he watched them closely as they fade away little by little. Dream had miraculously lit a small fire in the few seconds and the flame flickered like a ribbon, radiating energy, pulse by pulse. </p><p>“I’m…” Dream started. “Why would you want to know?”</p><p>He didn’t know what to answer. “I don’t know.” That was the only thing he could come up with. </p><p>“I’m twenty one” was the reply. </p><p>He didn’t know how much that was, or how much different it is to his age. </p><p>“Where is this place?” He asked Dream, who was drawing a sac of water from his belt and opening the bottle. He hadn’t felt a need for water nor food that he had forgotten about them. </p><p>“I don’t know,” Dream answered as he took a gulp of water and wiped the droplets from his mouth with his sleeve. “But I know why I am here.” </p><p>Yet another confusing answer. He didn’t bother to ask more. It seems as if Dream knows everything but just refrains from telling him any, or that he was just pretending to know. Either one of the two he couldn’t care more about. </p><p>As he was sitting down to take his fair share of rest, Dream suddenly tensed up and raised his axe. </p><p>Wait.</p><p>Minutes ago he recalled Dream holding a dagger. </p><p>But none of that mattered when he saw what Dream saw: shadows, fast-moving, humanoid shadows that moved in irregular circles around the two. He had not seen them ever since Dream pulled him into the dusty little cave and assumed that they were just predators in the forest that he didn’t know about, but it seems as if they were only after him.</p><p>“Get behind me, quick.” It was an order. Harsh and stern. He did so. </p><p>One of the shadows struck, not with a weapon or any type of human-like movement. The shadow had morphed into a gust of sheer power itself, striking Dream’s blade once, twice, and with each time Dream backed off a little more until the two were pushed against the tree branches. </p><p>The shadows seemed to chant a word he could barely fathom. </p><p>“Stay…” They seemed to say. The world seemed to be revolving around his side. </p><p>“Stay…” The voices kept on saying. A shadow was still attacking Dream. He had nowhere to go but to swing his axe at the dark shape but it simply melted into the air and then reformed into a yet larger shape.</p><p>“Stay with us.” The shadows chanted louder. The world started spinning faster and merely after milliseconds, or less, he could not see things straight anymore. Dream’s form distorted around him, and he couldn’t help but to grip tightly onto Dream’s bright lime sweatshirt.</p><p>“Stay.” The shadows had now all turned into grains of smoke, flying together towards his head as if his brain was sucking the shadows all in. He was shedding tears, crying. Dream had dropped his axe and brought him in his arms. He clutched harder onto Dream and Dream held his head close to his chest. </p><p>Thump.</p><p>He could hear Dream’s heartbeat. </p><p>Thump.</p><p>Thump.</p><p>“It’s alright, it’s alright, it’s alright.” He could hear Dream’s voice softly floating into his ears. Like clouds. </p><p>Thump.</p><p>Thump. </p><p>Thump. </p><p>“Don’t listen to them. It’s alright. I’m here.” Dream’s words gave off a comforting heat, lips almost touching his ear. He clentched onto Dream, harder.</p><p>“You’re right here,” He whispered back into Dream’s chest. “And I’m alright… I’m alright.”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Wonderland Pt.3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>He had fallen asleep in Dream’s arms and only found out in the morning when Dream woke up before he did. Carefully, Dream extracted his arms from the tangle and got up, waking him in the process. He didn’t get up because he didn’t feel like talking to Dream after what had happened last night. </p><p>Dream’s heartbeat was like a pendulum, slowly but steadily calming him down. He thought it was familiar, like how his mother would carry him in her arms in his childhood and sing him to sleep. It was weird to think that of someone he just met.</p><p>“Good morning.” Dream said while holding a small package in his hands. He could tell that he was awake. </p><p>“Good morning, Dream.” Yawning, he mumbled. </p><p>“Are you hungry?”</p><p>“No,” He admitted. He hadn’t felt hungry just yet. </p><p>”Then… do you want to talk about yesterday..?” Dream tentatively asked. </p><p>He felt his heart drop. He tried to not think about anything after last night. He hadn’t dreamed of anything, nor woken up in the middle of the night. He, to some extent, felt embarrassed.</p><p>He shook his head silently. </p><p>Dream stayed quiet as he sat besides him and wiped his dagger with a clump of hay. His dagger was stained with black blotches and veins of thick liquid. </p><p>He felt sorry. The heartfelt emotions sprung from the insides of his chest like sprouts of grass. He didn’t want Dream to worry for him, although that already happened. </p><p>He rose from the ground, hoping to do something for Dream to make up for it. Smiling, Dream looked towards him while placing his dagger down. He couldn’t help but smile back, knowing that Dream cares about him.</p><p>“Do you want to stay here fore the night,” Dream asked. “Or do you want to keep going. To look for what we wanted to look for?” </p><p>Still, he didn’t know how to respond. He wasn’t sure whether if letting Dream protect him was a good idea, or whether if he still wants to know more about this world, whether if he would meet more shadows, be hurt more, and whether if he would end up hurting someone more important instead. </p><p>Dream just stared at him, in a softly menacing way enough to remind him that Dream was still there, waiting for an answer, but not pushing him. “Should I?” He ended up asking Dream, who might not know the answer either. </p><p>As expected, Dream answered “I don’t know.” </p><p>“Why?” He asked, not knowing what he meant. </p><p>“Well… I don’t know because you’re the one who doesn’t remember any fucking thing,” Dream started. “And as of why I am helping you… well let’s just say that it’s a gut feeling, for now.” </p><p>“So we can safely assume that everything we do now is all based on gut feeling?” He questioned purely because that was the exact reason why he trusted Dream too, and that all seems even eerier when Dream reciprocated that. </p><p>Dream nodded. It was not reassuring by any means. </p><p>“Sure,” He concluded. “I… I want to keep on going.”</p><p>“Good. Let’s pack up. We need to get going then.” Dream rose, plopping himself up using his wrists and extended a hand to him. He held on firmly to Dreams hand as Dream pulled him up from the ground. His light blue shirt was still damp from sleeping on the ground, but it didn’t bother him at all.</p><p>Small birds flew swiftly across the sky, leaving marks in the clouds. He was determined to find something, even if it doesn’t answer what he initially wanted. </p><p>But for now, it’s just a trip.</p><p>—</p><p>??????</p><p>“Mister————”</p><p>“Yes what’s the deal?” </p><p>“You’ve not been listening to a word we just said right?”</p><p>“No. I haven’t been sleeping well lately. Sorry.” </p><p>“No biggie bro. You need rest?” </p><p>“I… I think I’m fine.”<br/>“Do you want to play then?” </p><p>“Sure. Give me a second.”</p><p>He hustled to open something, put his hand on a round object, clicked open some other thing he just couldn’t recall the name of, and took a deep breath in. </p><p>—</p><p>That was a weird dream.</p><p>He woke up to Dream sprinkling water on his forehead.</p><p>“Thank goodness. I thought you were going to die.” Dream exclaimed. </p><p>They sat besides a small creek running down the same plains they slept on for last night. The water was clear, along with some small fish and birds in the water, absent-mindedly carrying on with their day. He envied them — at least they didn’t lack an explanation. </p><p>They had stopped because they needed water, and when Dream reached over the creek to fill their bottles, he wanted to follow Dream down to see, but that’s when he slipped and according to Dream: “hit your head on a stone or some thing.”</p><p>“God, I’m sorry.” He said. </p><p>“Don’t apologize,” Dream frowned. “But I want to know what that dream was.”</p><p>He frowned too. “What do you mean?”</p><p>“I can tell what you’re thinking, remember?” Dream said. </p><p>He had forgotten about that bit. </p><p>“I don’t know.” He admitted. “I don’t even remember what things sounded like, or what things looked like.”</p><p>Dream sighed. “But I can, I can. I can. I can. I can, I know what they sounded like.”</p><p>He couldn’t figure out why Dream sounded so… rushed and… angry; he couldn’t tell if he knew what to say right that moment. In fact, he was still lying in Dream’s arms like a child, hip on one leg and head on Dream’s palm. Dream had no intention to let him go, and neither did he want to forcefully sit up. </p><p>“I- I know who you are. I know who you are now,” Dream seemed to skip a beat. “At least I know what that dream was.” </p><p>“How?”</p><p>Dream used his left hand to take off his mask, unclipping the metal clasps of his mask and gently laying it on his chest. Dream then made him sit up, to face Dream directly. </p><p>“Huh…” He took a deep breathe in. “What color are my eyes?”</p><p>“What?” He marveled at the weirdness of that question. “Why… why would you ask?”</p><p>“Just answer me.”</p><p>“It’s…” He stopped for a bit and looked into Dream’s pupils. They were sparkling stars. “They’re green. Like the color of grass in morning dew.” </p><p>Dream looked sad for a moment.</p><p>“What about that?” He pushed.</p><p>“So I am Dream,” Dream sighed. “My name is Dream and I am twenty one years old. I… I will help you find who you are.” </p><p>He was confused. “I thought we’ve established that since… a while ago.” </p><p>Dream shook his head. “You don’t understand. You can’t understand.” </p><p>He didn’t want to prod more into what Dream had to think. </p><p>“It’s alright,” He found himself saying. “So, what now?” </p><p>“I’m still helping you,” Dream said. “You still… need me, for now. If you don’t want to die, that is. I don’t want you dying here.”</p><p>He nodded in response, not knowing what to think. The fish still swam besides him, but yet he felt different now. </p><p>—</p><p>“From how on, don’t go any further!” A voice shouted from behind them. They had just began walking downstream in hope to find a place to stay. </p><p>Dream whirled around — his reflexes were built for a fighter — and held him in his arms like a mother goose protecting its goslings from a giant looming above. But the talker was no giant. It was a short man, about the same height as him but a little shorter, wearing a hat made of feathers in a blue-black jumper. He had sprung out of nowhere and was standing in a derpy pose, as if not afraid of Dream’s shining, dagger blade. </p><p>“Who the fuck are you guys?” The man (boy?) asked the duo, feet impatiently tapping the cobblestone banks, occasionally splashing water up from the creek.</p><p>“Hey, language,” Dream frowned. “We are just passersby, looking for… the Castle.” </p><p>The man (boy?) tilted his head left and right, as if pondering on whether if to trust the two or not. </p><p>After an entire minute, the man said “put your fucking knife down, and we’ll talk.”</p><p>Dream lowered his knife, but didn’t let go of the little man in his arms. He gently tapped Dream on the chest, signalizing that he wants to be let go of. Dream complied but kept a hand on his shoulder. </p><p>“My name’s Alexis,” The man (boy?) started. “And this stream is mine.”</p><p>“I’m Dream,” Dream remarked. “And he doesn’t have a name… yet.” Dream pointed at him. He frowned back at how Dream didn’t give him time to speak first, although he didn’t know what else to say other than that.</p><p>Alexis frowned at the sound of that. “I see. So you’re looking for the castle, then.” </p><p>Dream nodded. </p><p>“Interesting,” Alexis nodded. “To search for something lost — that’s where everyone goes. You’ve lost your identity, am I right? I won’t stop you then, but be careful, I warn.”</p><p>That made no sense. </p><p>“What do you mean?” He asked. </p><p>Alexis only turned his back on the two, tilted his head left to right and to the left again repeatedly and waddled away like a duckling. “You might not find out what you really want to know. Good luck, boys!”</p><p>He said as he disappeared into the water. Dream and him looked at each other in the eyes as Dream sheathed his dagger. </p><p>“That was weird.” He remarked. Dream nodded in agreement. </p><p>“That was the first person I’ve seen in a while,” Dream said. “To be honest, that scared me.” </p><p>“I don’t think he’ll be the only one we meet.” He replied.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Wonderland pt.4</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>?????</p><p>I opened my eyes to a new morning. I barely remember what I dream of, unless I’ve been thinking about it too much. This time it’s one of those dreams. </p><p>I remember his eyes, crystal clear, looking into mine. It sparkled clear. </p><p>I want to see them, in real life, staring back into my own. </p><p>The bed was tinted with my sweat. I climbed up and headed for the shower; my cat scrubbing her soft fur on my ankle. </p><p>I leaned over to pet her. </p><p>Even though I knew it was just a dream, I wanted to be lost in it, and I hoped that he thought the same too. </p><p>—</p><p>They’ve been walking for an entire day on the plains, and somehow, as the sun was setting, they saw something different in front. </p><p>“That looks like smoke.” Dream said. </p><p>He wasn’t lying. Something in front looked like a giant tree sprouting from the ground into the air. Light reflected from its surface like tiny mirrors floating from the sky.</p><p>“Should we go now or tomorrow?” He asked for Dream’s better judgement. </p><p>“Tomorrow. I’m tired.” Dream replied. </p><p>He couldn’t agree better. Dream looked like he was built for traveling — Dream’s legs could rival the thickness of his two arms added together — and even Dream felt tired. He was doing much worse; his legs were near trembling. Dream noticed that too and slowed down while they tried to pick a place to stay for the night.</p><p>Eventually, they found a small party of trees that sheltered them. There weren’t many beasts lurking in the area, so they assumed it was a safe place to stay. Dream had lit a fire soon after he sat down and the two munched on fruits and jerky as they watched the sun sink into the horizon, painting the sky with purple, tinting it cocktail colored, intoxicating the clouds with weariness as the winds stopped. The air was hot and dry, and during the night it would be cold. </p><p>None of them had anything to talk about. He didn’t remember anything and Dream always looked like he had something else in mind which he didn’t feel like sharing. They just sat besides the fire, peacefully, quietly. </p><p>Dream tossed away a fruit core into the bushes near them. It landed with a “splonk” as it hit the ground, making one of the only sounds that echoed through the plains. He, on the other hand, still had half of a fruit in his hands which he didn’t feel completely like finishing but nibbled on it anyways. Dream looked over and smiled at him. He had already taken his mask off and laid it on the right side, reachable distance. He smiled back.</p><p>Dream reached over and put Dream’s hand on his face, thumb besides his mouth. He flinched, not because he was scared but because he was surprised. Dream wiped a speck of food from his mouth. </p><p>Dream giggled. “What did you think I was going to do?”</p><p>He shrugged in response. “I don’t know. Like, snap my neck or something like that.” </p><p>Dream laughed. “I don’t do that.”</p><p>He rolled his eyes. <br/>“You know,” Dream said. “You can be honest with me, right?”</p><p>He didn’t know what Dream meant. <br/>“I am honest.” He whispered. The moment he said that he knew it was nowhere near convincing. He found himself blushing, and attempted to bury his face in that half-finished fruit he was still holding. </p><p>He knew Dream didn’t buy that. </p><p>“Mmhmm?” He heard Dream hum. </p><p>“Just shut up, alright?” He grumpily mumbled. Dream laughed. </p><p>They spent the evening in silence, cleaning daggers, organizing supplies, counting leftover jerkies, and as soon as the moon rose, they lied down next to each other and fell asleep. </p><p>Before he closed his eyes, he saw shooting stars fling across the sky like curtains. </p><p>He wished for something, and Dream wished for something too.</p><p>—</p><p>He woke up in Dream’s arms again. This time, he woke up before Dream did, and by the coldness of the wind, he woke up a little too early. </p><p>He couldn’t fathom what Dream meant for him to be “honest.” He thought he was honest enough, and even if he wasn’t, he knew Dream could tell, so why bother?</p><p>Dream was still breathing steadily and slowly, like a beast, but a friendly one, gently acting as a crib, holding him   steady, unshakable, but soft. Dream’s chin laid lightly on his brown hair, and as Dream breathed moved slightly up and down as if petting him like a cat. And Dream’s cheeks… they were blushing red in the cold. He wanted to raise his hand and cover Dream’s cheeks, but Dream’s arms locked him in place, so he placed his hand on Dream’s chest and felt his heart beat. </p><p>He closed his eyes and tried to fall asleep again, listening to his heartbeat. </p><p>Thump, thump, thump.</p><p>How he wished he knew what Dream meant..</p><p>—</p><p>????</p><p>Sometimes, I can’t tell if I’m awake or not; sometimes, things in dreams just seem too real and real life seems too fake. The cold, feelingless screen just can’t make up for the feeling of him in my arms.</p><p>If only I can make dreams come true.</p><p>—</p><p>When he woke up again, Dream was still lying besides him, but one of Dream hands were now propping up Dream’s head, staring at him, half-sleeping. Dream looked like he had something in mind, something he would like to share but though it would be better if he didn’t. </p><p>“Oh good morning,” Dream suddenly exclaimed at the sight of his fluttering, opening eyes. “How was your sleep?”</p><p>He responded. “I woke up at dawn and fell back asleep again,” He yawned, raising his arms. “Didn’t sleep too well but it’ll do.”</p><p>He saw Dream’s face flush with cherry colors. </p><p>“I didn’t know you were awake. I’m sorry.” Dream muttered and said. </p><p>So it turns out Dream was awake. </p><p>“It’s alright. I don’t mind.” He smiled. It was true.</p><p>Dream took a deep breath and breathed out. “So, we’re heading to the smoky thing?”<br/>He nodded as he sat up. His vision blurred slightly from rising up too quickly but he shook out of it with a “brr.”</p><p>Dream had already packed up everything. He must’ve woken up, packed, and lay back down just to stare at him for the morning. The thought of that confused him. The floor was slightly damp from the morning dew and so were their clothes and shoes; Dream’s hair looked brown with all the moist in it. It was almost like magic.</p><p>The walk wasn’t very much eventful. Dream carried most of the stuff, leaving him trailing behind, occasionally running left to right when something in the bushes scare him — most of the times it was a rabbit or a hedgehog who won’t move out of the way. Dream laughed at him for being such a “scaredy cat.” He yelled at Dream for making fun of him, to which Dream responded by laughing more.</p><p>“What do you mean? You have a dagger and I don’t!” He complained loudly, scaring some of the animals away. </p><p>“You just scared them away without them scaring you! What do YOU mean?” Dream laughed even harder, emitting sounds of a dying tea kettle. He didn’t know how to argue back so he ended up laughing with Dream, the two of them almost rolling on the floor in the end. </p><p>“Why do you even laugh like that?” He managed to squeeze these words in-between his laughers. </p><p>“I don’t know,” Dream responded in the same way. “I just do.”</p><p>After an entire 10 minutes, Dream demanded a time out, claiming that he couldn’t stay like that much longer, and a single second more of laughing will rip his life out of his poor body. He couldn’t agree better and spent much of the remainder of the walk in minimal noise.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Oh by the way if you want to follow me on Twitter I’m @FraustHaruka I do art and sometimes post random crap</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Wonderland pt.5</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I just realized that these are not one shots by the least... so this is a collection of short stories.</p><p>There’s a lil bit of Niki Wilbur shipping... but it barely matters :)</p><p>Oh and I will probably be starting a new short story soon also on this book I think will be called “Hanahaki Love”. I wonder how it’s gonna go.....</p><p>Also thank you for your hits I appreciate it so :’)</p><p>Finally here’s my Twitter it’s @FraustHaruka I do art and talk shit it’ll be cool if you want to follow me there too :)</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>There were many people in the city, if you can call it that. It looked more like a town but with a giant castle towering over where everyone lived in the center. The citizens were talking to each other as if they haven’t a care in whatever they should be doing. </p><p>“Hello travelers, you two look new,” A brown haired guy in his twenties in a yellow sweater approached the two in a slow but organized fashion. “Do you need a guide?”</p><p>He looked at Dream before nodding to the guy. “We came to… look for something.”</p><p>The man shot out a hand. “Cool, my name’s Wimblur, the best bard on this land.”</p><p>Dream had his mask on so it always looked like he was smiling. “My name’s Dream and… he does not know his name… yet.” He held onto Wimblur’s hand and shook it. Wimblur smiled with enthusiasm at the two and he couldn’t help but smile back.</p><p>It turns out that the city was steaming because of the bakery — where Wimblur lives with Niki, his close childhood friend. Niki offered a place for Dream and him to stay, and they couldn’t be more grateful. </p><p>“Thank you very much.” Dream slightly bowed to Niki, showing his gratitude without emotions. </p><p>Niki smiled with much warmth. “No problem. I heard you are searching for something you’ve lost, and this is the best place to be, they say.” She laid down a tray full of bread and olives in front of him and Dream before leaving the room to the two. </p><p>“You have the keys to this room,” Niki’s voice echoed in the hallway. “Feel free to leave and come back in the time being. Wimblur will be close too!” Her footsteps trailed off into the distance.</p><p>Dream untied his mask and placed it on the windowsill which he cannot quite reach because it was too high up on the wall. There was a red mark on Dream’s face from wearing the mask for an extended period of time when Wimblur was determined to take them on a giant tour encompassing the majority of the city except for the castle which guards wearing red cards guarded 24/7.</p><p>“So... what now?” He asked Dream, who was reaching for a slice of freshly baked bread. “I don’t think neither Niki nor Wimblur would know my name and we aren’t allowed in the castle.” </p><p>Dream replied with a mouthful of bread. “I guess we look for other people first?”</p><p>“And then if nothing happens we try to enter the castle somehow.” He finished off. Dream nodded in agreement. </p><p>His stomach was growling for attention so he reached for a slice of bread too. The airy, spongy insides were still warm from the heat in the oven and he couldn’t resist but to take a big bite. Dream had already finished his slice and went for more, this time with two more olives. </p><p>He peered to his left, looking into Dream’s eyes which were focused on eating. Dream noticed. “What. Is there something on my face?”</p><p>He shook his head. “No. I’m just thinking about something.”</p><p>“You can always talk to me, if you want.”<br/>He shook his head violently from left to right. He doesn’t know what he’s thinking about either, it was a feeling, itching and tickling from the underside of his heard, crawling from his torso into his mind, but he couldn’t articulate, nor form them into threads of thought. Dream seemed to catch that somehow, and just adjusted his position to face him more. Both of them just stared at each other for a long, long while. </p><p>“Dream?” He mumbled.</p><p>“Yeah?” </p><p>Sunlight shone into the room again. It was nowhere near night, but his mind suddenly revisited last night, when they were staring into the sunset and the night sky. The sunlight painted Dream’s face golden and reflected off his hair like shards of mirrors, glistening, twinkling, like stars. </p><p>“Thank you.” He said, dimples showing when he grinned. </p><p>—</p><p>?????</p><p>How I wished I had seen that in real life. </p><p>How I wished I could do that in real life. </p><p>Even if it was just in a dream…</p><p>He didn’t know I was also looking at him too, though even if he did it wouldn’t matter. </p><p>It was just a dream anyways.</p><p>—</p><p>Wimblur was playing songs in a bar and invited them to go too. He didn’t recall being able to drink anything alcoholic, but Wimblur said they had juice and he’d pay for everything because he needed more listeners and said it was a good way to “get around knowing people.” Dream didn’t argue against it because he said he can do with a drink to relax. In fact, he seemed a little looking forward to it. He didn’t know what to think about Dream getting drunk. </p><p>Before performing, Wimblur went to the bartender and ordered a berry-fragrant juice and some sort of tea mixed with heavy alcohol what he didn’t understand. The bartender eyed the two before making the drinks while Wimblur stood besides the door with a harp. </p><p>Dream held onto him loosely by the shoulder as if he was going to lose him if he didn’t. There weren’t much people in the bar though. </p><p>“Good evening, ladies and gentlemen,” Wimblur announced. “I am your bard for tonight. You can call me Wimblur Snoop. Hope you have a good evening.” So his last name was Snoop. Weird. He thought to himself. </p><p>Wimblur stoked his hands across the harp, and at first the sounds were tiny but the harmonies merged together to form a tune. He closed his eyes and listened. </p><p>“Well I heard there was a special place,” Wimblur started. “Where men can go and emancipate.”</p><p>It was oddly familiar for someone who lost all of his memory. </p><p>“The brutality and tyranny of their rulers…” The melody carried on. </p><p>He frowned even more. It seemed too familiar to be just a Deja Vu. He was panicking, somehow, and he started breathing faster. Someone tapped him on the shoulder and yoinked him out of his deepening spiral of thought. It was Dream, holding a drink in each hand and passing the juice over.</p><p>“You alright?” He whispered. </p><p>“Mmhmm.” He replied. </p><p>“My L’manberg, my L’manberg.” Wimblur sang. Every single word rang with emotion.“My L’manberg,” Wilbur carried on.</p><p>“My L’manberg.” He found himself singing those words. </p><p>“Why did I know that.” He muttered to him self, eyes widened with surprise. Dream looked over his shoulder, raising a brow and taking a giant gulp of his drink and wincing afterwards. It must be a little alcoholic than he originally thought. </p><p>“For freedom and for liberty, our nation sought to build on these. A victory for all under our freedom.” Wilbur continued to the second verse. He was barely listening anymore, because his mind forced him to write every single verse in ink, etching them into his brain. </p><p>“Hey.” He heard Dream whisper directly into his ear. He could not take it in though. </p><p>“We built a house and watch it end,” His mind kept on writing. “And from the rubble, emerged my great L’manberg.” </p><p>“Hey!” Dream was shaking him by now. </p><p>“And from all lips from here up to forever.” His voice was shaking at the end. The song finally ended, and he woke up with the halt in the chords. He was shedding tears silently, and it seems that Dream was cupping his face with his hands, staring directly at his face.</p><p>“What’s happening,” Dream demanded. “Tell me, now.”</p><p>“I heard that song before. I heard that song, somewhere before.” He spitted out the words rapidly. </p><p>“That, is the anthem of the imaginary city of freedom and liberty. L’manberg. My own creation.” Wimblur announced in the distance. </p><p>“So you were here before,” Dream suggested. “And you listened to Wimblur sing that song.”</p><p>“I don’t know, Dream,” He admitted. “I can’t answer you.”</p><p>“Do you still want to stay here then?” Dream asked.</p><p>“I’m not against it,” He answered. Although that song made his head hurt, he calmed down and ignored it. Dream was on his second drink already and looked as if he wasn’t against more, so he played along, occasionally sipping on his juice; bitter but sweet. </p><p>Bitter but sweet.</p><p>—</p><p>He never expected to need to carry Dream back to the bakery. </p><p>Wimblur stopped singing at about midnight, and by that hour Dream had already drank too much to stay awake. When he asked Wimblur why he allowed Dream to order that much, Wimblur replied with “It was the best drink they had, what did you expect?”</p><p>He knew that Dream was tall, but didn’t expect Dream’s legs to still touch the ground even if he carried Dream on his back. </p><p>“Come on, carrying your boyfriend back from a drink or two is not that uncommon.” Wimblur teased. </p><p>“He’s not my boyfriend!” He argued back.</p><p>“Really?” Wimblur sounded surprised. “I really thought you were. I’m so sorry. I’ll tell Niki to get you another room if you want.” </p><p>He shook his head the best he could. “It’s alright. Don’t need to worry the two of you. Plus, I thought the two of you were dating and I was surprised when you said you were just friends.” That was true. They look liked a newly wed couple settling down on the edge of a small town. </p><p>What he didn’t expect was Wimblur’s face flush red as if he suddenly got drunk. “No,” He stuttered. “I just haven’t had the chance to ask-“ </p><p>“Ahh,” He replied. “Gotcha.” </p><p>“Forget it,” Wimblur swatted a thought away from his face. “Oh and also. I don’t recall you around here. How do you know the lyrics to that song?” </p><p>He was talking about the anthem. “I don’t know.” He admitted. </p><p>“Hmmm. Maybe my name is spreading across the entire land and I’m just getting famous.” Wimblur suggested. They took a turn in an alleyway and arrived at the bakery where Niki was holding a tray with 3 glasses of milk, or yoghurt, smiling in the doorway. </p><p>“Welcome back! I heard you talking so I decided to pop out and greet you here.” She smiled even harder.</p><p>Wimblur rushed to Niki. “You should be sleeping by now! Yesterday you complained about not getting enough of that!” He said as he took the tray and ushered Niki inside, leaving him with drink Dream on his back. </p><p>“God,” He mumbled. “Wimblur! Can you help me get Dream up the stairs, at least?”</p><p>“Pfft,” Niki laughed so hard something was tumbling down the table. “Oops! There goes your yoghurt Wimblur!”</p><p>“Ahhhhh!” Wimblur shouted in response. “YOU knocked that off the table, not me!”</p><p>He found himself laughing, while struggling to carry Dream.</p><p>“Help?” He giggled and mumbled. </p><p>—</p><p>?????</p><p>I felt like I was having a big, big hangover. </p><p>Which was weird, because I didn’t recall drinking a heavy lot before sleeping. </p><p>I didn’t recall much from my dreams either, but a tune kept on ringing through my head as if I ate someone’s phone and they had that song for an alarm clock. </p><p>“Well it goes like this the fourth, the fifth. The minor fall and the major lift. The baffled king composing…” I hummed to myself as I headed towards the shower; head still aching in the process.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Wonderland pt.6</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Slightly child inappropriate little bit of seggs related things but y’all be alright you can skip it if you want </p><p>Don’t know why I’ve been writing a lot recently</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>After 15 minutes of struggling, he finally managed to get Dream tossed on bed. By then, Dream looked like he was fast asleep, more so than a pig under a pen. He sighed as he headed to the bucket of water Niki placed in the corner of the room earlier. </p><p>Their current residence is the attic of Wimblur and Niki’s house with a small window right on top of the somewhat large sofa-bed that Dream was currently taking up. There was one table with two wobbly chairs right in front of the bed that Niki especially told them not to move because it might just crumble when they try. The walls and ceilings were speckless except for a palm sized spider they called Weston. </p><p>He picked up a towel and dipped it in water before rubbing his face and neck. The water was cold and so was the attic, so he shivered and made a weird sound at the feeling of water dripping down his neck and into his shirt, touching his chest, before soaking into the fabric. </p><p>Dream mumbled something in his sleep behind him. He peered back to catch Dream swaying gently from side to side, still with his eyes shut. They haven’t been on a bed in a while and sleeping on it looks tempting enough that he soon found himself taking off all his packages and untying his shoelaces.</p><p>Dream still had his dagger on his strap across his chest. He looked at if for a second and contemplated whether if to take it off of Dream or not. He always had it on him, and taking it off might be just the wrong decision to make, but the city was safe and Niki and Wimblur slept in rooms downstairs. He reached for Dream’s strap, trying to unbuckle it. </p><p>It was almost a split second when he felt a firm hand snatching both his wrists and lifting it into the air. Dream was wide awake, staring into him with an expression clearly more angry than just confused. </p><p>“I’m sorry,” He exclaimed quietly. “I thought you would sleep better without it.” At the sight of him, Dream relaxed and gently lowered his hand. </p><p>“Oh, it’s you.” He sighed. Dream still spoke with a boozy tint. They were so close to each other he could smell what Dream had drunk the night before. Dream started to breathe heavier as if he smelled something which made his heart speed up. </p><p>Dream had tensed up and held both of his hands in the air, pressing him onto the side of the bed where there are cushions behind his back. </p><p>“Dream?” He managed to let out a whimper. </p><p>“Shhhhhhh.” Dream hushed him as he felt a hand slip under his shirt, right where the water trickled down. Dream’s rough thumb rubbed his smooth skin, lightly but powerful. </p><p>“Dream? You’re still drunk.” He repeated. Dream held his hands so tightly they started to feel numb, the feeling trickling down his arms. </p><p>“Shut up.” Dream mumbled. He brushed his lips on his pure, white, neck as he leaned forward even more. Dream was looming over him, covering him like a thick, cotton blanket he never owned. </p><p>He whimpered and leaned his head to the left, somewhat giving Dream more space. Dream accepted it as he kissed him ferociously, twice, before lightly biting him and leaving a flowering mark. </p><p>He couldn’t remember how long Dream was there for, but slowly Dream relaxed, and it was not too long before he slumped completely on him still, and was breathing steadily, regularly, and deeply. </p><p>“Dream?” He whispered.<br/>Dream was back asleep like a large puppy. Both of them faces still scalding from what just happened. He relaxed and shoved Dream to a side before pulling down his shirt and trying to go to sleep besides the wall, thinking back again and again. </p><p>His heart was jumping up and down like a baby bunny who just won’t go to sleep. Maybe he liked it.</p><p>—</p><p>The shadows came again, this time during midnight. </p><p>They strangled him by the neck. He couldn’t breathe. </p><p>Dream was still sleeping peacefully besides him, but he couldn’t make a sound, he struggled, a tear fell from his cheek. </p><p>“Stay.” The shadows whispered, straight into his ear. </p><p>“No!” He tried to shout.</p><p>“Stay with us.” The shadows pressed harder, now towering over him, pressing his torso so hard he could hear his own heartbeat in his ear, bursting his veins. </p><p>“Stay.” They called. </p><p>It came, again and again, until one moment, his body gave in. He was trembling, shaking, almost broken. </p><p>Thats when the shadows melted into him, leaving him like nothing happened, not even a single mark.</p><p>He fainted into the deep darkness. </p><p>—</p><p>?????</p><p>In a dream, anything can happen, and it’s going to be alright, because it’s just a dream, when no one can remember what happened, and even if they can, it’s never real. </p><p>“No one in my dreams are real anyways,” I thought. “It’s just a dream, an unreachable dream, an unfathomable dream, just a dream, with him and me in it.”</p><p>—</p><p>He woke up, yelling something he couldn’t understand, and immediately realized he shouldn’t. Dream jerked awake, almost pulling out his dagger before asking him what happened. </p><p>“They were here again, last night,” He said. “I couldn’t fight back. You were asleep and I couldn’t talk. I had to give in, Dream.” </p><p>Dream turned around and hugged him. “Did they disappear into you again?” </p><p>He nodded, even if he knew Dream couldn’t see. </p><p>“God,” Dream groaned. “I am not having more of that drink ever again.” </p><p>He giggled. “I had to carry you home, Dream.” He suddenly stopped at the thought of last night. </p><p>“What?” Dream noticed. </p><p>“Oh. So he doesn’t remember.” He thought to himself before remembering Dream had an unbelievable sixth sense. </p><p>“What did I forget?” Dream asked. He gently let go of him, only to spot the blooming mark Dream had left on him the night before. “Oh…”</p><p>He tried to cover his neck the mark with his hand, only to reveal a bruise on his wrist, which also happened to come from Dream’s in vino doings. </p><p>“It’s… nothing.” He didn’t know why he decided to lie. </p><p>“God, I’m so sorry.” Dream put his face into his palms. He knew Dream was steaming on the inside and didn’t want Dream to feel more embarrassed. </p><p>“No, Dream, don’t apologize. You… you were hellishly drunk.” His voice trailed off into the distance, knowing that it wasn’t convincing. </p><p>Dream reached over to touch the mark. He moved his hand away but was caught by Dream.</p><p>“You can be honest with me, you know that right. You can tell me to stop, and even when I’m drunk as fuck you can tell me and I’ll do what you say.” Dream whispered. </p><p>“What do you mean,” He replied. “I am honest with you.”Dream leaned over. “Then tell me you liked it. Tell me that I can do it again.” </p><p>He couldn’t find a reply on the tip of his tongue. </p><p>“That’s what I thought.” Dream replied as he pulled back, a glint of sadness in his eyes which he could barely notice, not if he looked for it. </p><p>“I didn’t mean-“ He started. </p><p>Someone knocked on the door. It was Niki. </p><p>“Morning the two of you!” She called. Dream immediately rose to open the door, leaving him behind, staring at Dream’s back. </p><p>Niki was holding a tray of bread, milk, butter, and a small bowl of jam. Dream thanked Niki and accepted it before bringing it back to him. </p><p>Dream sat down back, reaching for a slice of bread in silence. </p><p>“Dream.” He said. </p><p>“Forget about it.” Dream replied coldly. </p><p>He didn’t want that. </p><p>“Dream.” He said again, this time firm.</p><p>“What.” Dream said impatiently.</p><p>He leaned over and put his lips on Dream’s and closed his eyes.</p>
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<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Wonderland Pt.7</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Gonna be honest I don’t know where I’m going</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>?????</p><p>“It’s a fragment of my imagination. I imagined it.” I keep on telling myself that. My mind’s fooling with me, twisting and turning me like a marionette, swaying my arms, my legs, my hip, and my heart. God’s making a joke to pity me, to make fun of me, for not getting what I want. </p><p>“Hi guys.” I was on his stream. Listening to his voice made me happy, and even though I know I can’t see him in real life, at least I can stay on his side. Knowing he’s my friend made me both elated and devastated at the same time, knowing somehow that we can’t be anything more. </p><p>I decided to call him, say something stupid, act like I’m alright. I haven’t streamed in a long time because I had too much things in mind. He sounded sleepy too, but he was always like that. I suddenly realize why anyone would sleep for 14 hours a day.</p><p>“Hey!” His voice appeared on my phone. I muted his stream so we could talk to each other. </p><p>“You sound tired.” He remarked. </p><p>“So do you,” I replied. “Not a good night of sleep?” </p><p>—</p><p>He didn’t know what Dream thought about it and didn’t want to ask. </p><p>Dream had held him in his arms and kissed him back, twice as hard, but he didn’t spare a single word. The finished the bread in silence before Dream took the tray downstairs, leaving him on his own. Wimblur was singing to Niki downstairs, perhaps another new song he came up with. </p><p>“Some times all I think about is you.” The lyrics were something like that. The tune echoing throughout the house. </p><p>Strange. He thought he had heard that song somewhere else too. </p><p>Wimblur was interrupted by Dream, who probably just showed up at the staircase. </p><p>“Good morning, dunderhead!” Wimblur exclaimed. “How was your drink last night?”Dream mumbled something like “don’t talk about it.” He could barely hear Dream’s voice, not that he especially wanted to know what Dream thought anyways. </p><p>“Why? Is getting carried home by your small flimsy friend not fun?” Right. Wimblur was definitely mocking Dream on purpose. </p><p>“He could do with some exercise.” Dream replied.</p><p>“Hey!” He couldn’t help but shout into the door. “I can hear you guys!” </p><p>“It’s true. You need exercise.” Dream remarked with a giggle. He can hear him laying the tray down on a tabletop. “Thanks, Niki.” </p><p>“No problem.” Niki said. </p><p>Wimblur shouted upstairs. “You should probably come down. Today I’m going to take you to the plaza. You’ll meet some other people there too.”</p><p>He groaned as he stepped off of the soft cushions, swung the little bag he had onto his shoulder, and headed downstairs. </p><p>“I’m coming!” He declared. </p><p>—</p><p>Wimblur was performing at the plaza right in front of the castle. The moment they exited the bakery, when Wimblur started to lead the way, Dream said nothing but laced his fingers in between his fingers and held on tight. </p><p>“Don’t talk about it.” Dream whispered. A cherry color flushed his pale face, painting it with heat. He decided to not address it.</p><p>Wimblur suddenly stopped in front of them. He looked back at the two and frowned. </p><p>“There’s something going on in front.” </p><p>He wasn’t wrong. There was a sound of a riot coming from the direction of the plaza. Many people were running away, but more just stood there, making way for an incoming hoard. </p><p>“What do we do?” He asked Wimblur, who by now just noticed Dream and his hands interlacing, and frowned even more. </p><p>“We step aside and wait,” He replied. “Also, I thought you weren’t dating.”</p><p>“Don’t talk about it.” He repeated what Dream just said. Wimblur raised a brow and stepped to the side against the wall of someone’s house. Dream and him followed behind. </p><p>He tugged onto Dream’s hands when the shouting intensified. Dream pulled him closer, so the two were almost completely touching on one side. Wimblur just stared intensely into the distance. </p><p>There were people whispering at first. </p><p>Then whispers turned to talking. <br/>And as talking turned into screams, someone ran across the corner. </p><p>“It’s his majesty!” Wimblur exclaimed. </p><p>He squinted to look attempt to see the running man better. His crown, now dented, was resting on his dark, curly hair as well as a pair of sunglasses. His cape was only half on, a button already gone. He was racing across the city in his boots clearly not made for running.</p><p>He was chased by a handful of guards dressed in white and red. <br/>“Down with the king!” The guard in front shouted. He was holding a pole-arm with a heart-shaped tip, running behind the vagrant king who was just a little slower. </p><p>The guards behind him chanted and yelled, but were nowhere as fast and agile as the one in front. </p><p>“Nick! We can talk about this!” The king managed to shout as he made a corner, straight to where Wimblur, Dream, and him were standing.</p><p>The guard named Nick replied. “Too late, King Eret! Down with the King!” He shouted before throwing his spear, hitting the King on the shoulder and pinned him to the ground. </p><p>“Don’t move.” Dream held on even tighter to him. He wasn’t planning on moving in the first place as he also gripped tighter onto Dream’s green sweatshirt. </p><p>“Nick, why?” King Eret managed to get on his back, staring straight into the guard’s, Nick’s, eyes. The blood from his shoulder tinted his white cape red and colored the stone-paved floor. </p><p>“It was never meant to be.” Nick picked up his spear from the ground and was prepared to stab the King again, this time where it was meant to go. </p><p>King Eret tried to sit up but was met with a spear tip to the neck, tip already in skin. A trickle of blood left the King’s neck, to the the spear, and landed on the ground.</p><p>“Your new petty King needs me alive.” He said. Suddenly, everyone fell silent except for the King and the guards, who were exhausted from the chase. </p><p>“He doesn’t,” Nick held his head higher. “And you don’t get to call my king ‘petty.’”</p><p>“He does. I know how to rule a Kingdom.” King Eret retaliated. </p><p>Nick lowered his spear and squinted at the King. “I will kill you if you try to run or fight back.” The King nodded as he stood up from the ground, left hand in the air and right hand trying to cover up the wound Nick had caused in his left shoulder. </p><p>“Very well,” Nick said. “Follow Alyssa,” He gestured at the shortest guard. She nodded. “And I will be right behind you with my blade on your back.” King Eret did what he was told. </p><p>As the group walked away, everyone started whispering again, as if nothing had happened. He was about to relax too when he saw Nick turn his head and stare at Dream, him, and Wimblur. Their four eyes met and Nick frowned at the sight of him. He quickly turned away, avoiding all trouble. It was best for him to not upset a guard who literally just wanted to kill the King.</p><p>As soon as they disappeared into the corner, Wimblur turned towards the two. <br/>“Does that happen very often?” Dream asked before Wimblur can say much. </p><p>Wimblur shook his head. “It’s not a surprise though. The White King was too full of himself. He had just one guard who turned his back on him. Nick, the man you just saw.” </p><p>Dream nodded. “So I heard a new King takes over?” </p><p>Wimblur nodded. “That’s what I heard. I feel so sorry for you, visiting at such a bad time.” “It’s not your fault,” Dream said. “Do we still head to the plaza?” </p><p>“I have a job to do and money to earn. So… yes.” Wimblur concluded as he took a step forward. </p><p>He looked at Dream, who was adjusting his mask, and followed.</p><p>—</p><p>The man in the giant wings caught his attention. </p><p>“Phil!” Wimblur exclaimed. </p><p>The winged man named Phil was talking to two boys who were dressed in opposite colors — a blonde wearing a white shirt under red suspenders and the other brown haired boy wearing a black shirt under green suspenders — turned over to greet Wimblur. </p><p>“Eyyy my mate!” Phil smiled and waved. </p><p>“How are you Phil?” Wimblur jogged towards them. Dream and him followed slowly. </p><p>“I’m great! I was talking to Tommy and Tubbo,” He was talking about the boys. They waved at the sound of their names. “Who are these?” </p><p>“My name is Dream,” Dream answered politely. “Apologies for my mask. I don’t feel exactly comfortable without it.” </p><p>“Hi big D. You just visiting here?” The blonde hair asked. Tommy. </p><p>“I don’t think I go by big D,” He could tell Dream was frowning under his mask. “But this right here is looking for some answers.” </p><p>“Why do you need answers? Are you bad at maths?” The other boy asked.</p><p>“Uh… No.” He responded with a chuckle. </p><p>Phil took a giant breath out of his foot-long pipe and exhaled. “So what are you here for?”</p><p>“I don’t remember who I am.” He admitted. </p><p>Phil didn’t even look surprised. “Well, you’re in the right place. I don’t know a lot about that shit but I am sure someone in here can help.”“Yeah! I’m sure if you ask the squire of the King, he can tell you something.” Tubbo remarked. </p><p>“Or if you ask the King himself!” Tommy added. </p><p>“I really don’t think they can see the King after the previous one was literally almost butchered on the streets when we came here, but good try boys.” Wimblur let out a small smile. </p><p>“Oh,” Phil smoked again. “So down with the White King then.” He acted as if he expected it. </p><p>“Anyways, you guys talk,” Wimblur left. “I need to earn money!” </p><p>Tommy and Tubbo started becoming intensely interested in Dream’s mask, Tommy reaching over to tap it slightly. Dream leaned backwards. </p><p>“Is it wood?” Tommy asked Dream. </p><p>“No. I don’t know what it’s made out of actually.” Dream admitted. </p><p>“Why do you keep it on?” Tubbo questioned. </p><p>“I don’t know either. Trust issues, maybe.” Dream said. </p><p>“Oh, so you don’t know anything either.” Phil raised a brow. </p><p>“At least I know my name and why I’m here,” Dream shrugged. “This man right here doesn’t know crap.”</p><p>“Hey! Isn’t that why I’m here?” He complained. Phil laughed. </p><p>“I know two people who are notoriously talkative about people,” Phil commented. “They’re on the edge of the city in a forest. I might be able to take you there.” </p><p>Tommy and Tubbo jumped happily. “We can take you there!” They said almost completely in sync. </p><p>“I’ll go too, if the two of you want to go.” Phil said carelessly as if he had nothing better to do.</p><p>Dream looked at him, then at Phil. </p><p>“I see no reason why we shouldn’t.” Dream remarked. </p><p>—</p><p>?????</p><p>They say dreams are the manifestation of your forgotten memories or those you want to leave behind. </p><p>“I don’t want to leave him behind.” </p><p>—</p><p>“You know, sometimes this world doesn’t allow you to get what you want. It creates troubles for everyone: for you, for him, for me, for the King, for a peasant, and sometimes you just have to accept what this world has given you because there’s always a reason for it. Say, you lost your memory. It doesn’t mean the world wants to rip you of something. It gives you more possibilities.” Phil said as he lead the way into the forest — more like garden. </p><p>“What do you mean?” He asked out of genuine confusion.</p><p>Phil looked back at him but didn’t stop walking. “Let’s put it this way: you’ve lost something, for sure, but because you lost it, you are able to gain some other things. Maybe you wouldn’t’ve came here and met Wimblur, or Niki, or me, or Tommy and Tubbo,” He gestured at the two boys who were clearly arguing about which way is “up.” “Or you might’ve found more of yourself. You see, the way around this world is not defying what it gave you, but is to accept it, and grow from there.”</p><p>“So,” He cleared his throat. “Are you suggesting that I just don’t look for answers and just live my life here, give myself a fake name, and start new?” </p><p>“I mean,” Phil spun his pipe around with his long, bony fingers. “It’s an option. You see, I am not a very radical person, and if I were you I might just drop it.” </p><p>Dream, who was silently walking while holding his hand, suddenly spoke up. “But we’re already here.”</p><p>“You haven’t found anything yet,” Phil shrugged. “It’s not too late.”</p><p>“Phil!” Their conversation was interrupted by Tubbo’s obnoxious shout. </p><p>“What is it boys?” Phil turned to talk to the boys. “Where are we supposed to go?” Tommy asked. </p><p>“Goddammit.” Phil laid his face in his palm, displeased, before running in front to lead the road. </p><p>Dream squished his hand. He whined silently when he couldn’t feel his fingers. </p><p>“What do you make of that?” Dream whispered just loud enough so he could hear.</p><p>“Phil has a point.” </p><p>“But we’re already here, it would be a pity not to move forward, right?” Dream prodded again. </p><p>“You have a point too.” </p><p>“It’s your call.”</p><p>He sighed. “I don’t know, Dream,” He stared far into the forest. “I’m torn. Now it’s like making decisions for someone I don’t even know but I don’t want to know what happens when I remember. But I mean, before the very end, I still have time to give up, right?” </p><p>“Mmhmm.” Dream hummed. </p><p>“Boys! Stop messing around with the signs!” Phil yelled, smacking both Tommy and Tubbo with the pipe. </p><p>Him and Dream giggled behind them. </p><p>“Be honest to yourself, and I’ll follow you wherever you go,” Dream said as he bent over, slightly displacing his mask so his lips show, and kissed him on the cheek. “I’ll be there too.”</p><p>—</p><p>And there sat two strangely looking men on a long table drinking tea and wine out of cocktail glasses. </p><p>“My, my, my. Who have you brought us today, Mr. Phil?” A man in a black top hat and a black and red suit asked. He had pure white, glowing eyes and sharp teeth, a tail swing behind the tall, wooden chair he sat with a crossed leg on. </p><p>“This is Dream and his… friend.” Phil introduced, Dream bowed slightly and so did He.</p><p>“And… why are they here?” The other man asked. He looked as if he was wearing a suit made of diamonds and candy, contrasting with his healthily tanned skin and his dark hair. </p><p>“Phil told us that you were the two people to talk to if we… want to know things about… things we didn’t know.” Dream vaguely concluded. </p><p>“That,” The man in the top hat declared. “Makes no sense to me. But have a seat. So do you, Phil. The boys can play besides the pond.” </p><p>As they sat down, cocktail glasses appeared in front of their seats, automatically filling them with random drinks displayed on the table. Dream reached for the wine in front of him but was shot down by his gaze. He couldn’t afford to carry Dream back to the bakery again. </p><p>“I probably know what you don’t know,” The blue man said. “Judging from how you were introduced, you don’t know who you are.” The man pointed straight at him with a judging finger. </p><p>“Zak, it’s not nice to point at people you just met.” The hatted man said before taking a gulp of what appears to be just plain red tea. </p><p>The man named Zak rolled his eyes and continued to look at him, to which he looked like he expected an answer. </p><p>“That’s true.” He confirmed, not knowing how to answer. </p><p>“And? You want to find out about it?” The hatter asked with a brow up. </p><p>“I thought that was obvious, Daryl.” Zak commented and was immediately hushed by Daryl’s hiss. </p><p>“You know,” Daryl started. “Zak and I are always talking, but it doesn’t mean we know everything. Phil,” He gestured at Phil who was nonchalantly cleaning his pipe with a baby blue mushroom. “I think you’ve taken them to the wrong people.” </p><p>“That doesn’t stop us from having tea together.” Zak shrugged. </p><p>“True.” Daryl agreed, taking another sip. </p><p>“Then let me ask you guys a riddle, while you’re here.” Zak hummed.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. Wonderland Pt.8</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Warnings// implied seggs (I changed the audience to teen and above but please skip it if you’re uncomfortable.</p><p>I couldn’t sleep because of this last night so spare me please....</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Why is a raven like a writing desk?” </p><p>—</p><p>“Because they both have a b in it.” </p><p>—</p><p>“Some things just don’t have a reason.”</p><p>—</p><p>“You just need to believe in it.” </p><p>—</p><p>?????</p><p>“Some things just don’t have a reason.” </p><p>Some things. </p><p>One thing. </p><p>All I know that the one thing is the irresistible urge to pull you closer, even if it was just in my imagination. I wanted to guard you, to guide you, to garnish you. </p><p>To love you. <br/>That’s my one thing without a reason. </p><p>And I hoped that that was your one thing too, and you will lead me, follow me, be my side, and be mine. </p><p>—</p><p>They got nothing out of that conversation and decided to leave when Phil declared that he was going to fall asleep. </p><p>“The last thing I am going to say to you,” Daryl rocked his head from left to right. It was a marvelous sight that the top hat didn’t fall off. “Just don’t forget who you are again.”</p><p>“What do you-” He wanted to ask. </p><p>“You’ll get it one day.” Zak concluded. </p><p>—<br/>“I’m going to rest there. Come find me whenever and I’ll be there.” Phil gestured at a huge, sturdy mushroom on the far end of the garden. The two boys were nowhere to be found but Phil shrugged it off and told the two that the boys were going to be fine. Dream thanked Phil before the winged man flew off, leaving the two alone again. </p><p>“That wasn’t much helpful.” He pouted. </p><p>“At least we tried.” Dream dismissed it. </p><p>“What now? Do we go back to the bakery and call it a day?” It was about 4 hours past noon and the sun was still brightly shining in the sky. </p><p>“The hatter — Daryl — mentioned that there was a waterfall and a river 30 minutes from here right,” Dream scratched his hair. “Not gonna lie, I need to clean myself.”</p><p>Dream pointed to what appeared to be East. A vague rainbow loomed over the skies under the distant clouds. </p><p>Dream was right. A little bit more sweatier, they’ll be kicked out of the bakery. Both of them smelled like old soot from a chimney mixed with rainwater and dust combined with the smell of rotting leaves. He nodded and started walking. </p><p>“Do you want to talk about this now,” Dream squeezed his hand that joined them for the entire day. “Or do you still want to give it a while.” </p><p>“I…” He was hesitating. “I mean, what about it?”</p><p>“The fact that you kissed me in the morning after I almost fucked you and now you don’t dislike the fact that I’m holding hands with you for the entire day… that.” Dream mumbled very quickly as if he was reading a prayer. </p><p>“I mean… I’m not against it.” He figured he couldn’t say more. </p><p>Dream looked like he wanted to say something more but didn’t. Instead, he pulled him closer as they walked like one person, heading straight towards the waterfall. </p><p>—</p><p>“Thank goodness there’s no one here.” Dream exclaimed. Dream unbuckled the belt that carried his dagger and supplies and flung them onto the ground. He had let go of his hand just then but kept each other close. </p><p>“I mean, I don’t think a lot of people take a bath in a river at like 5 in the afternoon,” He smiled. “I thought people had more work to do. Plus, they all look like they have a bathtub of some sort.” </p><p>Dream let out a sound which resembled loosely of a grin. </p><p>“I’ll be waiting here for you to finish, if that’s all right.” He mumbled and sat down. </p><p>He didn’t expect Dream to sigh and kneel down right in front of him and hold him by the back of his head, fingers lacing into his hair. </p><p>“Why?” Dream asked. He still had his mask on, and he was staring into the stupid smiley face painted on it using something like charcoal, making the scene much more frightening than it should be. </p><p>“I just don’t feel like taking my clothes off, you know, in broad daylight.” He mumbled. Dream pulled in closer. </p><p>“Theres no one here.” </p><p>“I mean, you’re here.” He squinted. </p><p>“See? This is what I mean,” Dream pulled him closer, again, until their faces are almost touching. He put his hands on Dream’s chest. “You’re afraid. After so many things you’ve done you suddenly contradict yourself by saying ‘I don’t know’ or something stupid and leaving me hanging. You’re afraid to make a decision for someone you don’t know, and yet you are yourself. It doesn’t change a fucking thing.”</p><p>“What do you want me to do then?” He questioned Dream. </p><p>“Be honest to yourself. Tell me what you actually want you dickhead,” Dream was growling deeply into his mask, his voice echoing off the insides. “You know what you want from this, from me, and you know what I want from you.” </p><p>He couldn’t lie to himself. </p><p>“Take my mask off.” The words were like orders he could not disobey; so he did, with both hands, slowly but steadily until it dropped onto the ground with a “plop.” But now that his hands weren’t there to push Dream away, he was tugged in closer. </p><p>He could feel Dream’s heartbeat from his chest. </p><p>“Kiss me you fucking coward.” Dream challenged as he leaned even closer, lips barely touching as if waiting for him to initiate. </p><p>“Why should I?” He knew what he was going to do, but making Dream mad was part of the plan. </p><p>“Shut up and do it.” Dream snarled and breathed heavier. His breathe still smelled like the honey biscuits Zak offered to them during tea.</p><p>“Fine.” He mumbled and bit Dream’s downer lip lightly, like a tiger cub learning how to hunt by trying to kill his brothers. Dream tilted his head so their noses didn’t bump into each other and bit back, harder; but only to love, not to hurt. </p><p>Dream pushed the line further. </p><p>It seems as if they’ve forgotten what they were there for: purposes pushed aside by hands on waists, chests, hair, legs, and hips; lips on each other. They ended up under the waterfall, clothes and mask on the bank, only the two of them, falling into wonderland. </p><p>“Dream.” He whimpered.</p><p>“Mmhmm?” Dream was sucking a hickey on his neck, a hand gently stroking his wet, brown hair. </p><p>“Give me a name.” He demanded. </p><p>“You have one.” Dream didn’t stop. </p><p>“I once did, but not now.” </p><p>“We’re here to find it, we’re here to find if for you.” Dream bit into his skin and gently licked away the blood. He winced. </p><p>He put a hand on Dream’s back and the other on Dream’s dirty blonde hair. </p><p>“You want me to do it again?” Dream whispered a question in to his ears. </p><p>He hummed and answer, and for a while it was just water splashing and the sounds of them under it, him under Dream, being left alone.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0010"><h2>10. Wonderland pt.9</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>//main character almost dies</p><p>Also 3 uploads a day pog</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>??????</p><p>He didn’t want to go.

</p>
<p>—</p><p>They returned to the bakery with wet hair and blushed faces. </p><p>“I was wondering where the two of you were, seeing that you were not home when I came back, but now I don’t really think I need an answer.” Wimblur stared at the blossoming marks on his neck. </p><p>“Well… that we can explain…” Dream started. </p><p>“Oh no please don’t.” Niki laughed a half-complaint and Wimblur bursted into laughter. </p><p>“You’re good,” Wimblur waved. “Did you find anything new today?” </p><p>“Phil took us to tea with… Daryl and Zak.” He commented. </p><p>“Then clearly Phil didn’t know what he was doing. My bad.” Wimblur concluded. He wasn’t half wrong. Zak and Daryl had spoke nothing but riddles and jokes in the hours they sat and had “tea” together. </p><p>“I found some words inspiring.” Dream turned his head to the side. His mask was hanging from his neck as he had no intentions to hide his face in the bakery. </p><p>“You’re one of the few, sir,” Niki giggled. “Was it the dormouse story that Daryl keeps on telling?”</p><p>“No,” Dream shook his head, “Although it was also interesting to listen to.” </p><p>“Oh was it one of the riddles?” Wimblur asked. Dream nodded. “Why is a raven like a writing desk.” He whispered. He felt Dream laying a hand on his shoulder. </p><p>“I never got that one,” Wimblur frowned. “Despite the time I spent with them drinking vodka in their pretty garden.” </p><p>“Because some things just don’t have a reason.” He thought to himself. </p><p>“You just need to believe in it.”</p><p>—</p><p>?????</p><p>I think I’ve gotten to the point of either I was sick or crazy, and either way I needed a therapist. </p><p>I’ve been sleeping way too much than normal, and even when I do I always wake up feeling like I’ve barely fallen asleep, as if I’ve been in a constant trance. </p><p>Maybe that’s what the real world was. Maybe that’s what waking up was — a constant trance. Only when you’re asleep you can actually think, act, behave like yourself. </p><p>I hate to put it that way.<br/>
Reaching to the desk besides the bed, I grabbed my phone, but instead of contacting my therapist, I texted him. </p><p>“Good morning :)”</p><p>—</p><p>Both of them were tired. Immediately when Dream entered the room he almost fell onto the soft mattresses and blankets face forward. He felt the same too. Dream stayed still as if he was dead, but his breathe gave him in. </p><p>He signed as if he was disappointed and happy at the same time. </p><p>“Why’d you sound so sad?” Dream mumbled into the blankets. </p><p>He wanted to open his mouth and respond, but something muffled him like a rotting damp towel on top of his lips. </p><p>He screamed. </p><p>Dream immediately climbed up from bed and pulled out his dagger from the sheathe. He could vaguely hear Niki and Wimblur climbing up the wooden stairs, into the attic.</p><p>It was the shadows.</p><p>They held him by the head, the neck, on his shins, his ankles so he was half floating in the air, half strangling. The shadows were freezing cold, whipping the warmth out from his skin. </p><p>“Niki, Wimblur, stay away! It’s dangerous and you can’t fight!” Dream shouted to the two already outside of the door. Wimblur threw open the door anyways to see him distorted, hung in the air like a puppet. </p><p>He wanted to yell “let go of me” but the shadows pried open his jaws and filled his mouth with what feels like thick, black smog. Tears streamed down his eyes from the pain. </p><p>He was too high up for Dream to reach, and even though Dream tried flinging bags, fruits, even his dagger up into the air, it wouldn’t seem to harm the shadows. </p><p>One more twist his wrist would be broken.</p><p>“Crack.”</p><p>He couldn’t hear Niki’s panic shouts nor Dream calling for him. Neither could he see because it was foggy, like glass panes in winter during the mornings.</p><p>“Help.” He whimpered. He knew they were trying to. </p><p>“Crack.”</p><p>—</p><p>It dropped him on the ground.</p><p>“Crack.”</p><p>—</p><p>He didn’t know what felt worse, that or having to pass out when at least three people witnessed his helplessness against an unfathomable force, not being able to tell them if he was alright.</p><p>To be honest, he wasn’t alright. </p><p>The last thing he saw was Dream’s tear falling onto his cheek.</p><p>—</p><p>He was seeing himself in third person, or rather, seeing his… friend and the couple who were kind enough to keep them in the bakery struggle to wake him up while he had no control of his body. </p><p>He was floating almost right next to the window, light directly passing through his phantom shape. </p><p>Niki was holding what appeared to be strips of fabric and wood, scrambling to re-locate his wrist which looked very much broken and twisted. Wimblur was carrying a tub of water which Dream used to rub his face along with the towel they had on the side of the room. He could see that he was twitching and crying in pain; Dream wiped his face with his thumb gently. It seemed to calm him down. </p><p>He could hear himself whimper. </p><p>“Dream.” He was calling for him, even when he had no control over his body. </p><p>“I’m right here.” Dream whispered into his ears, and even though he knew it was quiet, somehow it echoed around the attic, soft and steadying. </p><p>He was gripping onto Dream’s sleeve with his good hand. </p><p>“Dream.” </p><p>“I’m right here.” Dream repeated.</p><p>“I don’t want to go.” </p><p>“I love you too.”<br/>
—</p><p>?????</p><p>Death.<br/>
Somehow an inescapable topic which somehow belonged to the older population appeared in my dream.</p><p>If it were in real life, I would’ve said the same thing. I just wasn’t sure if he would say it too. </p><p>And every time I think about it again, I would always tell myself that it’s fake, it’s in my head. No one would die like that in real life. </p><p>It’s not real life.</p><p>—</p><p>His eyes jerked open because he knew he had to. His head still hurt from the hours of oblivion and his near death experience, but he knew he needed to at least tell them that he’s alright, that he’s not dead, that he meant it when he said ‘I don’t want to go.’”</p><p>He was almost completely lying on Dream’s lap. It must’ve been because Dream insisted that he looked after him through the night, so when he opened his eyes, he saw Dream’s face. </p><p>“That’s not good for your neck, Dream.” He whispered in a raspy voice he didn’t knew he had. </p><p>Dream’s eyelids fluttered and didn’t open. His leaned back, however, probably in search for a more comfortable position. </p><p>He tried his best to scoot up, where he could help Dream lie down more comfortably. Dream deserved more than a good night of sleep. </p><p>Eventually, he managed to slide off Dream’s lap and sat up. It was harder than he had originally thought, meaning he might’ve broken a rib or two when he fell to the ground too. He surveyed the room. Except for where he fell, everything was almost back to normal.</p><p>Until he saw the white shards on the ground. It was a mask, a broken mask. An eye and half a mouth on each side it lay quietly on the floor as if it had served its purpose. </p><p>Dream had used it to throw at the shadows in hope to save him. </p><p>“Maybe it was what saved him from the shadows.”</p><p>At the thought of that a sudden urge of guilt washed over him. Dream’s face was the thing he was most conscious about, and yet he was willing to sacrifice something he cherished for his life. </p><p>Dream deserved more. </p><p>“You’re awake?” Dream muttered. He turned his head to see Dream’s eyes opening and smiling in joy.</p><p>“I’m so sorry, Dream.” He tried to hold in a flood of tears. </p><p>“Don’t be. You should be more sorry if you died right in front of me.” Dream scooted over for an embrace. </p><p>“Ow,” Dream accidentally pressed onto a bruise. “I’m sorry Dream, you deserve better than that.” </p><p>“What do you mean,” Dream held his head to his chest. “You’re the best thing I’ve ever had.” </p><p>And suddenly, he couldn’t hold back the tears anymore. In moments he was sobbing into Dream’s shoulder, Dream stroking him gently on the back. Yet he couldn’t stop himself from apologizing again and again, Dream silently listening to him cry, holding him. </p><p>“It’s alright. As long as you’re here,” Dream put his large, firm hand on the back of his head and put his lips on his after he stopped dropping tears. “I’m right here too.”He gripped onto Dream’s shirt with his left hand, unwilling drooping his right to the side because it was tiring to raise it. He kissed back, tears starting to form again.</p><p>“Don’t cry please, at least don’t cry because of me.” Dream whispered before he pulled him into another soft kiss once more. </p><p>“Your mask though,” He murmured. “Your mask is broken.” “It doesn’t matter,” Dream mumbled back, burying his face in his shoulder and taking a deep breath in. “It doesn’t matter.” He repeated. </p><p>“I should also apologize to Niki and Wimblur too.” He said. </p><p>“I’ll go. You can’t walk with a twisted ankle.” Dream replied. </p><p>He had almost completely ignored the pain until that point. </p><p>“Don’t leave, just yet.” He mewled into Dream’s shoulder. Dream sighed with a smile and continued to stroke him gently on the head and back. </p><p>“Dream?” He said. </p><p>“Mmhmm?”</p><p>“Thank you.”</p><p>—</p>
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<a name="section0011"><h2>11. Wonderland pt.10</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hmmmm part 10 pog :)<br/>This chapter is a bit short because I lost all my inspiration in a good sleep. BUT I promise the next chapter is going to be more fun!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>?????</p><p>“You don’t sound too good.” I typed into Discord. I didn’t call him because he was streaming. </p><p>He paused what he was doing and presumably picked up the phone. </p><p>“Nightmare yesterday. Didn’t sleep well, again. Nothing new.” He replied. </p><p>“Ngl me neither.” I replied. </p><p>—</p><p>Dream made him stay in bed for the rest of the day, claiming that he wasn’t going to be able to walk and Dream couldn’t afford to carry him on his back. Dream said that he was going to do some walking around the area, potentially talk to some citizens and help Niki with the bakery; it pains him to think that he would have to stay there alone. </p><p>“You’ll be fine,” Dream had said. “I’ll be helping in the bakery at noon and you can always yell downstairs for my attention.” Dream kissed him goodbye. </p><p>He pouted. “I want to do something too.” Dream kissed him again. </p><p>“You’re helping by staying alive and well.” Dream mumbled. </p><p>He felt guilty: of course he felt guilty for letting someone do his work and make another person worry for him. Dream saw it in his eyes, smiled, and rubbed his cheeks with his thumbs. “And if you’re wondering why I am doing this.” Dream said. </p><p>“Why?” He asked, trying his best not to cry again. </p><p>“Well, it’s because you’re beautiful, magnificent, special, and I love you.” Dream cupped his face in his hands and squished them. </p><p>“Dream!” He shouted. Dream wheezed. </p><p>“Bye!” Dream turned around and left, closing the door softly behind him. </p><p>He rolled his eyes and leaned back into the back of the bed which Dream had made it so all of the pillows were standing up and he could spend the day sitting, looking at the door and the table or dust floating up and down in the sunlight. </p><p>He didn’t notice that he was fiddling with Dream’s broken mask until he accidentally jammed his left index finger in one of the sharp, broken edges. </p><p>“Ow.” He muttered to himself as he realized. </p><p>He held the half of the broken mask into the air; the pointed tip of the shard barely touched a ray of sunlight, reflecting the glaring light into his eyes. He winced and blinked twice. He only had a half of it: Dream must’ve taken the other half with him, even knowing that it wouldn’t help him with hiding his face. </p><p>He flipped it over, trying to look at where Dream had put his face inside the mask. He placed it over his right eye, mimicking Dream. He couldn’t see anything. </p><p>“What?” He quietly whispered. “Am I doing anything wrong…”</p><p>He took it off and tried again, and that’s when I realized that Dream couldn’t see anything in the mask. </p><p>“Impressive,” He thought. “To know that he was literally blind in the mask to hide his face. To know that to hide his face he would rather not see anything, to know that Dream trusted him almost the moment they met, and to know that he would go outside without a mask for him.”</p><p>He held the mask in his hand again, and noticed a “scar” in the back of the mask. </p><p>He looked closer, and it read:</p><p>“Keep It So You Can Find Me Whenever” carved in stupid cursive. That’s what Dream was doing when they were eating breakfast. </p><p>He hugged it to his chest, and even though he wanted to shed tears again, he held it in, knowing that if Dream was staying strong and doing everything for him, he needed to be strong too. </p><p>—</p><p>Wimblur was kind enough to come upstairs and talk to him about two hours after Dream left. <br/>“Don’t you have like work or something?” He asked Wimblur. </p><p>“Apparently not, the shop owner canceled it last minute. Niki’s making a new batch of bread, and I just wanted to check on you.” Wimbur smiled warmly, pulling a chair to sit down in front of him. </p><p>“Thank you, I appreciate it so much.” He grinned. </p><p>“How are you feeling now?” Wimblur asked. “I’m not going to lie, you scared us so bad yesterday.” </p><p>“I think I’m fine,” He said. “It’s not the first time the black, shadow-y things came for me. But they never, like, tried to kill me though.”</p><p>“Is there like, a pattern? Like when they show up?” Wimblur asked again. “I don’t…” He started as he searched his mind. </p><p>There was a pattern — slightly embarrassing to stay. </p><p>“It comes whenever I,” He stuttered. “I don’t know how to put it, but, um, it comes whenever I do something happy with Dream.” </p><p>“Hmm.” Wimblur hummed.</p><p>“Forget about it,” He waved. “What about you and Niki?”</p><p>“Don’t talk about that, I’m here to talk to you and you’re pissing me off now,” Wimblur giggled. “I don’t want to ask her, just now. I’m not confident enough.” </p><p>“Then let’s not talk about that either.” He laughed. </p><p>“Although I want to ask you a question, dear sir,” Wimblur scooted his chair closer. He put the mask onto his lap, listening. “How exactly did you two get together in one single night?”He felt himself blushing hard. “I know you’ve heard me say this a lot, but I don’t know,” He uttered. “It seems like Dream had been guiding me through, you know, my life ever since I met him in the woods when I don’t remember… anything except for how to walk, and the night he was drunk, he, sort of, told me that he loved me, and I felt like I did too.”</p><p>“I don’t know if I should ask this but,” Wimblur mumbled. “But do you love him too, or do you feel like you love him because he loves you?” </p><p>He never thought about that before. “Does it matter?” </p><p>Wimblur frowned. “I don’t know, I just felt like I should ask.” </p><p>“To be honest, I don’t know either.” Both of them were suddenly attracted to a sound at the door. The wooden door creaked open, revealing a large, green figure. Dream. </p><p>“Oh, welcome back, Dream.” He smiled at Dream, Dream walked closer, laid his bag on  the table in front of Wimblur, and squatted down in front of him.</p><p>“Just remember whatever you think, remember that I love you.” Dream smiled. </p><p>“God, get me out of here,” Wimblur rolled his eyes. “I don’t doubt a single bit of you guys just to be clear. I’m gonna head down and leave you to your own.” Both of them waved to Wimblur as he got out of the room. </p><p>Dream climbed onto bed putting his head on his shoulder. </p><p>“How was your morning?” He asked, searching for Dream’s hand with his left. </p><p>“I missed you, but it was fine.” Dream mumbled. </p><p>“You need to rest.” He said when he finally found Dream’s hand. </p><p>“No, I just want to spend time with you now.” Dream raised his head to kiss his chin. </p><p>“Hey!” He yelled. “Don’t do that, it tickles and I can’t tickle you back with a bad hand and a bad rib.” </p><p>“That’s the point.” Dream did it again. </p><p>“You’re so annoying.” He giggled. </p><p>—</p><p>?????</p><p>It pains me to think about how differently I act in my dreams in comparison to the actual me. </p><p>It was almost like I was someone else, but wearing my skin. </p><p>I didn’t dislike it, but I felt weird, and I wanted to think that I… I can do better than that. </p><p>—</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0012"><h2>12. Wonderland pt.11</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>So it turns out: I write way faster than I think I do.<br/>Also, coming up with characters is SO difficult.... I had to come up with an entire list of people in the SMP, but some characters are just not going to make it into the story and thus I apologize for fans of Connor, HBomb, Vikkstar, Lazar, and Foolish for ignoring them...</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Dream carried him downstairs eventually when he complained how bored he was: princess style; as much as he was against being carried like that, he was thankful for Dream respecting his choice. </p><p>“Oh hi!” Niki exclaimed when she saw them. </p><p>“Good afternoon Niki,” He waved. “How can we help you?” </p><p>“Oh cool, I was just about to ask Dream to help. I need to go buy some supplies — for some sort of reason we’re out of pepper and bacon. Can you just stay in the bakery for me? I’m sure you’ll figure it out if anyone comes, all the bread are labeled with their prices, if that’s alright with you.”</p><p>Both of them nodded. </p><p>“Thank you!” Niki exclaimed before she headed out of the door. Wimblur was nowhere to be found, presumably went to a performance somewhere in the city. </p><p>Dream sat behind the counter with him on his lap. </p><p>“Let me down.” He whispered. Dream gripped onto him tighter. </p><p>“No, you can’t stand on your own.” Dream whispered back. </p><p>“You can always put me down on another chair.” He argued. </p><p>Dream shook his head. “No. I want cuddles.” <br/>“Just because I told you I love you doesn’t mean you can hold onto me for as long as you want because I can’t walk.” He turned his head to look at Dream. </p><p>“Fine.” Dream pulled a chair over with his chair. </p><p>“Wait,” He frowned because he heard people talking loudly outside the door. “Dream, do you hear-“</p><p>“Yes,” Dream tensed up. “Wait.” Dream quickly put him on the chair and raised to open the door. </p><p>There were guards outside, holding spears, swords, and shields, asking people and cornering people to ask them questions. Dream quickly closed the door again as if a guard had spotted him. He frowned. </p><p>“What is it?” He asked. </p><p>“I don’t know.” Dream said. </p><p>And then they heard a knock on the door.</p><p>—</p><p>“I want to see someone.” A familiar voice echoed from outside of the door. It was… Nick, the guard, as of the guard who stabbed the White King in front of the citizens and the one who looked straight into his eyes when the guards left with the King. </p><p>Dream looked concernedly at him before opening the door. </p><p>“Um, if you’re looking for Wimblur and Niki, they’re currently not here.” Dream responded. </p><p>He could vaguely see Nick from the crease in the door. </p><p>“As the lead guard of the kingdom I have the responsibility to search the bakery before making a decision.” Nick announced. </p><p>Dream looked at him concernedly again before fully opening the door, revealing Nick, a female guard, and someone about 6 feet tall wearing different clothing than the others. Nick raised his spear and pointed it directly to his forehead. </p><p>Dream frowned, but without a proper weapon, he didn’t look like he was in shape for fighting three men backed up by the entire royal army while protecting his “handicapped” lover. </p><p>“You,” Nick bellowed. He voice channeled through the pole of his spear straight into his head. “What’s your name?”</p><p>“I don’t know.” He replied, voice squeaky like a rat. </p><p>“Don’t lie to me unless you want me to stab you right now.” Nick thundered. </p><p>“I’m not lying.” He stated. That was true. </p><p>Nick squinted. “And you?” He turned his head to ask Dream, the female guard moving her giant shield to push Dream into the corner of the bakery, and even though the guard was almost an entire feet smaller, Dream didn’t resist. </p><p>“Dream.” He said. </p><p>“Oh so now you’re lying too?” Nick roared. </p><p>“I’m not lying either. We’re travelers, and I got my name somewhere else.” Dream retorted calmly, which seemed to upset the female guard more. </p><p>“Alyssa, enough.” Nick said as he doubtfully lowered his pole-arm; the guard named Alyssa, although unwillingly, backed off and snorted. </p><p>“So you’re here for…” Dream started. </p><p>“Our Majesty wants you,” Nick pointed at him. “And if you,” He meant Dream. “Want to come, no one’s stopping you,” Nick stood straighter. “Stand up and follow me.” </p><p>“I can’t.” He blurted. <br/>“And why’s that?” Alyssa raised a questioning brow. </p><p>He raised his broken wrist. “It’s the same with my ankle. Any my rib cage, in case you wanted to know.” </p><p>Nick crossed his arms, somehow still gripping onto his spear. “Yesterday you were upright and walking.”</p><p>“That doesn’t mean I can’t break my ankle somehow last night.” He argued back, immediately he knew arguing wasn’t his best option. </p><p>Nick walked past the counter to get closer. He couldn’t help but lean backwards to remain the distance. The lead guard inspected him closely while no one else dared to breathe loudly. </p><p>“I think he’s lying.” Alyssa hissed. </p><p>“He’s not,” Nick announced. “And whoever did that bandaging needs to be given a lesson.” He meant Niki. </p><p>Nick stood straight again, leaving him half-frightened, half-stiff on the chair that for then seemed to be like the only thing keeping him from being pushed to the ground and stabbed. </p><p>“Callahan,” Nick bellowed. The guard-ish person on the side of the room who remained quiet for the entire conversation shuffled to stand besides Nick. “Carry this man.”“I’ll do it, if you’re still going to take us.” Dream growled. </p><p>Callahan stared at him, then Dream, finally a questioning eye at Nick. </p><p>“How can I trust you won’t run?” The armor pieces on Nick jingled as he turned. </p><p>“Well you’re gonna have to just trust me on that one.” Dream spat out a half joke. </p><p>Nick wasn’t at all convinced, but waved his hand and headed out the room. </p><p>“Alyssa and Callahan, you stand behind them. If you dare to run, I’m sure that even our little squire has enough bones in him to take you down.” Nick looked back and said. </p><p>—</p><p>There were people on the street, men, women, and children, whispering to each other as if the people were afraid that they could hear them. Surely Dream and him knew what they were talking about since the last person they saw “escorted” down the street by a group of guards was the previous King, who talked himself out of his death. They must be wondering why the King wanted him and Dream. They must be wondering what two random travelers had done to expose them like that. They must also be wondering why a man had to be carried by another man.</p><p>“If you feel nervous, just don’t look.” Dream whispered. It caught Alyssa’s attention but she only looked disgusted. He was on Dream’s back while Dream held him by his legs and his arms circled Dream’s neck like a lazy scarf. </p><p>He hid his face in Dream’s dirty-blonde hair.</p><p>“Ew.” Alyssa spat. Callahan, who was walking eerily properly, hummed in agreement. </p><p>“Focus.” Nick ordered. Alyssa instantly stood straighter. </p><p>Although his face was hidden, he could still hear every single voice from the people talking about him, talking about Dream.</p><p>Talking about them. </p><p>—</p><p>?????</p><p>Dear Diary,</p><p>My dreams are getting out of hand, and by out of hand, I mean it, literally, because I don’t know how I got from walking around in a wondrous forest to being wanted by the king. </p><p>In the middle, there were so much random stuff I can not even describe; and I’m afraid to continue because I’ve been not focusing — you can say that I haven’t been properly awake, yet some things in there are just to compelling that I don’t want to go.</p><p>What do I do?</p><p>—</p><p>A man in pure gold armor, a golden chain, and a white sweatshirt met them as soon as they entered the castle. From the outside, the castle looked like it was paved with white bricks and marble, but the inside is almost completely crystals of different colors — reflecting the light from the candles and lamps all around. Windows hung high up on the walls so no one really could see the outside unless they were on stilts. The man had a giant, dark-purple axe slung on his back and looked at them as if he would cut them into pieces whenever he felt like using that axe. </p><p>“Gottem?” The man asked Nick, who nodded with an unfathomable expression spread across his face. He didn’t hide his dislike. </p><p>“What are you doing here, Luke?” Nick questioned. <br/>“I’m on patrol,” The man named Luke put his hands behind his head. “I’m sorry for you who still have work to do.” He said mockingly.</p><p>“Then let me finish,” Nick nudged Luke to the side. “And go skedaddle somewhere you can entertain yourself — perhaps under a tree or something.” He continued marching on. </p><p>“Hmm,” Luke hummed as Dream passed the axed man. “Interesting.” </p><p>“Ignore him.” Nick ordered as Alyssa held her shield so Luke was blocked out of the way. Callahan simply sped up to catch up, still not saying a word. </p><p>“C’mon, so cold blooded. I just want to see what you’re up to, sassy little Nick.” Luke smiled hellishly. </p><p>“If you call me that again, we are going to have issues.” Nick snarled. </p><p>They took a turn left and passed a library filled with books and extravagant sofas — all red, the color of fresh blood. He shook at that thought. Dream gripped onto his thighs a little harder for reassurance. </p><p>“Get in the room. You’re not allowed to leave unless specially permitted.” Nick gestured to a stone door on the near left. Dream nodded and went in. Alyssa and Callahan stayed at the door while Nick went in too. </p><p>The room was well decorated: it had a large bed — first of all — with an old but perfectly ornate thick, cotton blanket along with a fireplace, well cleaned recently, a polished, wooden floor, a set of wooden chairs and a table, a small window lined with iron close to the ceiling, and finally a stone tub on a weird corner. </p><p>Dream sat down on the bed, gently putting him down, and stood back up again. </p><p>“I just want to remind you,” Nick took a deep breath in and out. “That you’re not prisoners, as much as you seem like you are. You are under the full protection of the royal guards and knights of this Kingdom as long as you do not violate any rules or laws we have set for you. If you need our assistance, you can always ask the guards outside your chamber — there will always be at least two — and they will help. Finally, we assure you that we are not going to harm you. You will be given daily meals and will attend meetings when you are asked for. We will provide you clothing, along with other necessities. Is every thing clear?” He tilted his head sideways, waiting for an answer. <br/>“Yes.” Both of them answered. It seemed so weird of how they were threatened to follow the guards, escorted as if they were prisoners, only to arrive at the castle under some house arrest terms with mandatory meetings, but neither of them decided that questioning Nick was a good idea, especially when they were in the castle already. </p><p>“Good,” Nick nodded. “I will have someone send you fresh clothing, food, and water. I’ll see you… sometime soon, perhaps.” He remarked before backing out from the room, slamming the door shut behind them. </p><p>—</p><p>“How confusing is this?” He looked up to meet Dream’s eyes radiating the exact same question. </p><p>“I guess it is a way to meet new people.” Dream said as he shrugged and stretched. <br/>“True.” He decided to be optimistic. </p><p>The two of them stayed in the silence for an entire minute. </p><p>“Dream?” He spoke up at a sudden thought. </p><p>“What?” </p><p>“Can I see your mask?” He was clutching onto the half Dream left him this morning. “You mean my half?” Dream asked. He nodded. “It’s here.” He drew it out of his bag. </p><p>He put them both on the area besides him, pieced them together, and frowned. </p><p>“There’s still a bit missing.” He remarked. </p><p>Dream looked surprised too. “I didn’t realize that.” </p><p>The triangular shard that was gone belonged to the middle of the face, right where Dream’s nose ridge would’ve started to rise. </p><p>“Well, I won’t wear it anyways,” Dream dismissed it with a casual wave. “Besides, I don’t think hiding my face in a castle full of people who would pounce on suspicious people is a good idea anyways.”</p><p>“You’re making excuses to make me feel better.” He muttered. </p><p>Dream paused for a split second. “I’m not. Stop calling yourself out for something no one blames you for. If I threw my mask at those shadows, which I did, it’s my fault that it broke and not yours, alright?” Dream said as he sat down besides him, looking in his eyes. </p><p>“Fine, I won’t,” He muttered in an undertone. “Sorry though.” “And don’t apologize for something you didn’t do.” Dream added. </p><p>“Do we just wait now, here?” He quickly changed a topic, afraid that he was going to make Dream irritated because of how much he apologized. </p><p>“I guess, unless you want to, I don’t know, break out of here with a broken ankle,” Dream replied. “If you really want to, I will go with you, but… I just don’t recommend it.” </p><p>“I’ll certainly not be doing that, good sir.” He asserted with a tone too serious for the occasion. Dream broke out wheezing laughters and so did he. Dream reached his arms out and hugged him, and he hugged Dream back. </p><p>“So yeah, we wait. We kill time by cuddling on bed, since that’s the only comfortable place in the room.” Dream stated.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0013"><h2>13. Wonderland pt.12</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Another boring chapter</p><p>New characters next chapter I promise......</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>?????</p><p>It’s getting weirder and weirder. </p><p>—</p><p>A little less than an hour later, someone sent in an entire tray full of food and water and a small box of clothing for both of them. She gently knocked on the wooden doorframe before entering and placed everything at the entrance of the room and quickly went out like a scared animal. Dream thanked her as she slipped out of the room.</p><p>Dream walked over, picked up the tray, and left it on the small table on the far side of the room. There were sandwiches and slices of fruit as well as thin slices of cheese leaning on the sides of the glasses of water. The maid must’ve slipped on the way here. Dream had also tossed the small case fo clothes on their bed, of which he examined absent-mindedly. </p><p>There’s 3 sets of clothes for each one of them — suits (a dark green one for Dream and a dark blue one for him, judging from the sizes), a set of casual wear that had a shirt which looked somehow half transparent, and a set of just a simple white shirt and grey sweatpants. </p><p>“Are you hungry?” Dream asked as he picked up a sandwich and started munching. </p><p>“Pass me a slice of cheese.” He said when he threw his shoes off and tried to kneel on the bed. Dream did. He didn’t recall liking cheese, but he didn’t want to eat too much — to be honest, he was still stressed. </p><p>Dream kicked off his boots too and sat on the other side of the bed, leaning across the back of the bed. </p><p>“I can tell you’re stressing out,” Dream remarked, with bread in his mouth. “I don’t think we can do anything about it though. Plus, I don’t think they wanted to harm us — if they do, we’re going to be in prison now.” He nodded, but he still didn’t feel like eating an entire sandwich. </p><p>Dream was half up, propping himself up with one elbow and the rest of the sandwich in his mouth, hand on the tips that was barely showing. He nibbled on the cheese — too salty for his taste; he winced.</p><p>“At least we’re not alone.” Dream said, staring into his eyes. </p><p>“Mmhmm.” He hummed an agreement. Dream was always so positive and he couldn’t help be jealous of Dream. </p><p>“I’m not positive,” Dream mumbled amid the sandwich. “I just don’t want to be negative.”</p><p>He finished the slice of cheese. </p><p>“I’ll be positive too, then.” He muttered. Dream reached over and put his arms lazily around his hip. </p><p>“It’ll be alright.” </p><p>—</p><p>Nick came into the room at about sunset. He had no idea when it actually was.</p><p>“I was told to check on you.” Nick said. He no longer held the spear, instead, a short sword was strapped to his belt on the left side, a shorter blade — perhaps a dagger — was lazily strapped to his left sleeve — a design he had never seen before. Dream was napping, because, according to Dream, he was “simply tired, wake me up when you feel like.” </p><p>“I appreciate the effort,” he said almost too formally, rubbing his broken wrist as he turned his head to face Nick. “But I can’t help but tell you I don’t like staying in this room and dislike the prospect of having to stay here for longer.” </p><p>“I won’t blame you,” Nick said. “But it could be much worse.” </p><p>“That’s what Dream’s been telling me before he fell asleep.” He snorted. </p><p>“Then he’s a wise man,” Nick argued. “And you won’t be staying here for the eternity of time, trust me. The King has hopes to… meet you. That’s how much I can say, for now.” </p><p>He was obviously confused. “What do you mean?” </p><p>“I can’t explain. I apologize.” Nick shook his head. </p><p>“Oh.” He sighed. He wished he could find out more.</p><p>“On a side note, is it true that you don’t remember anything?” Nick asked, squinting one eye and raising the opposite eyebrow. </p><p>“I won’t make such an outrageous lie if I did.” He responded. Nick crossed his arms as if he was still pondering on that. </p><p>“Just be glad it’s not Luke who’s in my place,” Nick spat. “He would’ve killed you right on the spot without your little boyfriend knowing if you talked to him like that.” </p><p>“Yessir, I will.” A voice echoed from outside the chamber. </p><p>“Luke! What are you doing here?” Nick exclaimed as he charged outside of the room, leaving Dream snoring and him in silence.</p><p>Strange encounter. </p><p>—</p><p>Fourteen days.</p><p>—</p><p>The’ve been in that room for two entire weeks already. </p><p>If he was there on his own, he would’ve killed himself somehow already. </p><p>The only person they’ve talked to in the time was Nick, Luke, and the maid who claims to be called Caroline. She was the most interesting one, given that she wasn’t supposed to talk to any of them, but Nick and the other guard outside didn’t seem like they cared. </p><p>She would always be very careful when she enters the chamber door, not because she was afraid of Dream or him, but that was how she did things. She was short and had un-human ears growing out from the sides of her head and whenever she walked quicker than normal those ears would bob up and down as if they wanted her to take flight with them. </p><p>“How are the two of you doing?” Caroline visited with a tray of food — this time it looked like baked poultry, a salad, and orange juice.“I don’t know.” Dream said. He had been doing as much exercise as he could in the time being, lifting chairs, shoes, firewood, or even him, so Dream was still in relatively good mental health in comparison to him, and even so Dream was still going insane. </p><p>“I don’t think we can get much worse.” He said weakly. There had been medics coming in and out of the room, healing his broken bones so that he could almost walk — they must’ve had magic. The medics never talked to them, perhaps they didn’t feel like doing so when watched by the lead guard. After a few more days, perhaps he would be able to pace around the room like an ill animal in a deserted zoo.</p><p>Caroline paused to lay the tray down on the table. “I’ve heard that there’s a… an event coming soon, maybe then you’ll be let out under the custody of guards or knights.” </p><p>“Really?” Dream sounded excited as he examined the poultry. </p><p>“It’s flamingo, if you’re wondering. The King was playing croquet.” Caroline whispered. </p><p>Neither of them decided it was smart to question any single word in that sentence. </p><p>“At least it’s edible.” Dream took a giant bite out of a flamingo leg and passed the other to him. He copied suit. </p><p>Both of their eyes were — in effect — glowing because they enjoyed the prospect of leaving the room, even if it was just for a tiny night. Dream was even humming a random tune, something Dream doesn’t do often.</p><p>“Well, gentlemen, I’ll leave you here,” Caroline bowed. They nodded in response. “If you need me, tell the guards and I will probably be here — although we are going to get busy soon.” She left the room, closing the door with a muffled sound. </p><p>They hear talking outside the door — it sounded like Nick warning her not to tell more about what’s going to happen. Caroline appeared to apologize before walking away on the marble floor outside. </p><p>“I don’t know what it’ll be like,” Dream said. “But that sounds funner than staying in this room.” “You bet.” He responded with a smile, sunlight from the windows shone straight into his eyes when he looked up.</p>
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<a name="section0014"><h2>14. Wonderland pt.13</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Ooooh Masquerade + new characters</p><p>//slight spoiler<br/>If you are confused, here’s a hint (skip it if you don’t want it):<br/>Consider “I” and “He” different people: maybe that’ll help.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Caroline was right. About a day later, the squire — Callahan — came into the room with a letter and a bag in his hand. </p><p>“What is it?” Dream asked. </p><p>Callahan passed it to Dream in silence, shaking his head, perhaps signaling that he didn’t know either. </p><p>Dream carefully peeled open the envelope while the rest of them waited silently. He peeked over Dream’s shoulder to take a look. </p><p>“You are invited to the Masquerade tomorrow night.” It wrote in bright golden letters which were almost glaring to his eyes. <br/>“We get to go out!” He exclaimed quietly. Dream smiled too. </p><p>Callahan gestured something, perhaps to indicate that they will still be under custody or something, but that hardly mattered: they weren’t trying to leave anyways. </p><p>“Thank you, sir.” He nodded his head at Callahan. The squire nodded back, the tip of his nose flushed red as if he was a reindeer. He quickly backed out of the room, leaving Dream and him on their own again. </p><p>“Well, thank goodness, I can’t tell you how tired I am of that wallpaper, lying here on bed all day.” He exclaimed. The wall in front him seemed to hum back a complaint, but he pretended to not hear. </p><p>“At least you can walk now,” Dream sat back down on bed and crossed his legs. “The medics sure know what they are doing.” “Tomorrow… I don’t think we need to prepare anything, since we have literally nothing.” He mentioned. Both of them had changed into the sets of casual clothing they were given, their original clothes nowhere to be found. Caroline had taken them earlier, he supposed. He could faintly see Dream’s tanned skin under the fabric, and it didn’t help how Dream didn’t bother buckling it up fully. </p><p>Both of them turned to the pouch that they’ve previously ignored — it was lying flat on the ground as if what it contained were completely flat: like a few boards of wood. He fiddled it in his hands before they opened it together.</p><p>Masks — for the masquerade. </p><p>Dream reached his hand in and pulled out the first. It had patterns lousily gilded over it, drawing out patterns of fur on the cheeks. It was smiling, similar to Dream’s previous mask. The mask itself was almost completely white except for a few light grey fingerprints which looked as if it belonged to the artisan who made it during the lunch break. Dream placed it over his face, tilting his head to the left and looking at him, as if asking whether if he looked good or not in it. </p><p>“You look so weird in that,” He remarked. “I liked your mask better.” </p><p>“What about yours?” Dream asked. He flipped the pouch over and dumped his mask on the bed. The mask was human-face shaped, covering his entire face. It was split cleanly in two colors from the top right to the bottom left. The upper side was blood red, and if he had not known that the Kingdom was fond of red, he would’ve thought it was a death threat. There were flowers blooming there— pedals wavy and thin, flowering straight from the mind. The bottom half was white: as white as Dream’s mask. Small flowers also embroidered the left side of the chin, inconspicuous. </p><p>He brushed the mask with his thumbs. It was much better made then Dream’s mask. The gold gilded sides were much more ornamented without a single speck, almost as if this mask was prepared for him a long, long time ago.</p><p>“What flowers are these?” He asked quietly. “And what do they mean?”</p><p>Dream encircled his arms around his, hugging him and looking at the mask at the same time. “I don’t really know what the big one is, but the white one,” He stroked the flowers with his index finger. “Is called ‘forget me not.’”</p><p>He froze inside of Dream’s embrace. Dream hugged him a little tighter as he noticed.</p><p>“Dream,” He started. </p><p>“What about me?” </p><p>“I just suddenly realized, what if I forget you too?” He gripped onto one of Dream’s arms with his right hand, wrist still distantly hurting from the incident more than two weeks ago. </p><p>“You have my mask,” Dream whispered into his ear. “And if you forget everything, show up in a random forest again, I will go there to find you. I will find you every time. I will fall in love you every time, too.” </p><p>He was shaken by the thought of forgetting more.</p><p>“It’s alright, don’t think about it. Just ignore it, we’ll have fun tomorrow.” Dream hugged him even tighter. </p><p>“You’re squeezing my rib.” He whined. </p><p>Dream moved his hands so he barely missed his bruises, casually putting his right hand on the left side of his chest. He could feel the warmth of Dream’s large hands through the thin fabric, and somehow that calmed him down too. </p><p>—</p><p>?????</p><p>Dear Diary,</p><p>Usually, I don’t dream about by friends being weird characters, but somehow that changed in a whim. </p><p>Sapnap looking like he wanted to kill Punz, and vice versa, was something way too new and unfamiliar to me. Callahan, sure, didn’t sound much different because he doesn’t talk, but seeing his face, his build in my dream when I’ve never seen him in my entire life was even worse than Sapnap and Punz wanting to gut each other. </p><p>And last of all, this dream has been going for over a month now. I don’t know what to think about that. Continuous dreams sound like something that only belongs in a sci fi movie and yet I have it right now. Sometimes, I feel like sleeping for the entire day because I know I’ll be back in that dream; and other times, I dread it because something bad happens, and when it does I’ll often wake up in sadness. I guess I’ll find a way around it.</p><p>—</p><p>Time pasted quickly when they look forward to something. </p><p>It felt like just a few hours instead of an entire day and all of a sudden, when they finally realized, they were both properly dressed in suits and mask already on the side of their faces, ready to be put on any second. A small party of maids rushed into the room to help them, only to find that they were almost done. They left soon afterwards, leaving a somehow comedic atmosphere floating around in the air. </p><p>“This is new: Dream in a suit.” He said as he adjusted Dream’s tie. Again, he marveled at how tall Dream was. </p><p>“You look good in a suit too.” Dream whispered as he looked down at him. </p><p>He frowned. “Why are you whispering?” </p><p>Dream didn’t respond, instead, he waited patiently for him to finish Dream’s tie. Then he squatted slightly, careful not to rip his pants, and pulled on his short little lover’s tie. <br/>“Because you look good, that’s all.” Dream said as he pulled him closer. </p><p>“You’re such an idiot.” He replied before going on his tiptoes and gently kissing Dream. Dream did so too, hand off the tie and on his hips, preventing him from tumbling over.</p><p>—</p><p>The masquerade was way fancier than they had expected, although it didn’t make sense to be any little fancy. Nick also had a mask on, although it only covered the top half of his face, showing most of his face and his chin. Dream and him agreed to stick together for the party because they have nowhere better to be. Nick claimed that he should stay with them too, which he figured to be an order from the King or something. They had no choice but to say yes. </p><p>They were against a wall far away from the center table, where all the people are gathered. Nick had a drink in his hand which he occasionally sipped from time to time.“Juice,” He said. “I am not allowed to drink.” </p><p>“I’d thought so.” Dream snorted. </p><p>“Can you tell us who’s who?” He asked Nick. Nick took a giant gulp out of his glass and eyed him. Nick pointed straight at a person in complete imperial purple. </p><p>“That’s Lord Grayson, the man who literally controls all the money in this kingdom,” The Lord was talking to another lady dressed in a fancy, white furled dress with roses on the side with a glass of what appears to be wine. “And that’s Lady Hannah. They grew up together and never talked to anyone else except for the Advisors and the King.”</p><p>The Lady was casually playing with her hair while she talked to the Lord, and the Lord didn’t seem to be too surprised about it. Faintly, he could hear their voices — talking about what seemed like politics and economics. He couldn’t bear to try to listen more. </p><p>There was a distant noise around the corner. Nick, Dream, and him all looked in the same direction at the same time. </p><p>“Challenge me, Sir Manifold.” A man under a wolf mask pulled out a long sword with his right hand while holding an entire vodka bottle in his left said to another, perhaps Sir Manifold, whoever that may be, in a mask which only covered the left side of his face. </p><p>“God, Luke, what are you doing.” Nick hid his face in his palm. </p><p>“I will never turn down a fight, Lead Knight.” Sir Manifold pulled out a sword too as they sparred in the middle of the party hall. Except for a few ladies who happened to be close, no one else even bothered to move. Instead, some watched while talking to whoever’s besides them, others simply carried on with eating, drinking, or socializing. </p><p>“Is this even allowed?” He asked Nick, who certainly disapproved. “It’s not, but the King doesn’t show up to these balls, masquerades… you know,” Nick mumbled. “So no one can control those two.” He sighed. </p><p>Sir Manifold was certainly skilled — even when his opponent was twice his width and a few inches taller, he could easily maneuver himself around on the carpet without hitting anyone in the process. Luke seemed irritated, but fended himself in a perfectly elegant and brutal manner. It was almost like two panthers fighting for territory, except if it was purely for a match. </p><p>“You certainly have improved, Sir Manifold.” Luke was teasing his opponent. </p><p>“Maybe it is because you’ve practiced less, Luke.” Sir Manifold retorted. They returned to sparring again, taking drinks once in a while. Soon enough, the two resorted into chaos before Luke finally winning, with his sword up against Sir Manifold’s chin. </p><p>“Good fight, though.” Dream remarked; he was holding a plate with a small yet delicate piece of cake on it. Dream dug a silver fork in it and took a bite. </p><p>“When did you get that?” He exclaimed. </p><p>“When you were busy looking at the fight.” Dream said, cream on the corner of his lips. </p><p>“I just realized: I can’t eat in this mask.” He groaned. </p><p>Both Nick and Dream burst into laughter. </p><p>“I don’t know, maybe lift it up from the bottom?” Nick suggested. </p><p>He tried to pull it away from his face but forgot his wrist still ached. It slipped from his hands, hitting him hard on the chin. Dream wheezed. </p><p>“I have a feeling that tonight’s going to be amazing.” He rolled his eyes and said, clearly sarcastically.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0015"><h2>15. Wonderland pt.14</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Implied intimate behavior (seggs to be specific) at the end!</p><p> </p><p>I love them so</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The masquerade went on “peacefully” afterwards. The Lead Knight became more and more drunk before he simply drank more in an inconspicuous corner; the Lord and the Lady talked for the entirety of the party as if they had nothing better to talk about; Sir Manifold, on the other hand, came over to Nick and them.</p><p>“How are you, Sir Manifold,” Nick bowed slightly. “I haven’t seen you in a while.” </p><p>“Call me Jack,” Sir Manifold bowed back, still holding his thirteen glass of wine. “And I’ve been doing pretty well — I didn’t think the King will become the King thus smoothly. I was talking to Karl and Anthony the other day, and both of them mentioned how good the Kingdom was doing lately.” </p><p>“That sounds better than ever,” Nick smiled. “Oh, this is Dream and his little friend, our guests for the meanwhile.” He held a hand in their direction: both nodded in respect to mentioning their names. </p><p>“I’ve heard,” Sir Manifold raised his chin so he could see better through his covered eye. “What do you think about… this party?”</p><p>Dream had eaten more cake than he had eaten anything else in the past day. He was, at that point, on big sugar high. “Ignoring all other aspects, the cake is brilliant.” </p><p>Sir Manifold chuckled. “I would imagine. His Majesty is very fond of cake like this, so even if he’s not here, he had his favorite cakes made for all his guests. Did you have any?” He was talking about him. </p><p>“I had some too,” That wasn’t a lie. He had tried his best to eat in the past hour by lifting his mask up with his left thumb and trying to hold a plate and a fork at the same time with somehow one less finger while Dream and Nick ate too. “It was very impressive.”</p><p>Sir Manifold twirled his fingers carelessly. “Good,” He said. “Nick, I’ll see you in a while, we need to discuss some extra matters — if that’s alright with you.” </p><p>“Yes, Sir Manifold.” Nick nodded. The Sir left soon after and was lost in the oceans of people. </p><p>“If I may ask, who are Karl and Anthony?” He tentatively asked Nick. Nick eyed him before he cleared his throat. </p><p>“Sir Jacobs and Sir Frost are the two advisors for His Majesty: both of whom are… wizards. Sir Jacobs surveys the land for love and Sir Frost does for hate. They are the most important people to the King, needless to say.” </p><p>“Are they here today?” Dream asked.</p><p>“Both of them dislike these gatherings: they would rather stay with the King, drinking tea, perhaps.” Nick replied. <br/>He disengaged himself from the conversation, excused himself to get another cake or a slice of pumpkin pie, and headed towards the nearest desk. In front of him stood a man in a light purple suit with a cyan sleeve on the right. The man stared at him, and even though he was taller than the man, he felt way shorter under his gaze. </p><p>“Excuse me,” He couldn’t help but apologize to the one in front of him. </p><p>“You’re excused.” The man replied, jerkily. <br/>“If you weren’t an important person and if I weren’t weak I would sure bash you on the head.” He thought to himself, but on the surface he simply gave the man a nod before reaching the table and getting himself a slice of red velvet cake, simply because it was right in front of him. He wasn’t too fond of his choice, but the man’s gaze was too pressuring for him to stay there any longer. </p><p>“Be careful,” The man whispered as he was trying to get back to Dream and Nick, straight into his ear, creeping. “Of your words from now on.” </p><p>A shock moved from his skull right to his tailbone through his spine. When he looked back, the man had already disappeared, leaving an empty space besides him as if the man had never existed. He hustled back to Dream, afraid that any more of being along will frighten him even more. </p><p>“Nick,” He asked once he got back to the wall. “Do you know who the man is with a purple suit and a cyan sleeve?” </p><p>“I haven’t seen anyone like that. Can you describe more?” </p><p>“Um,” He struggled to remember clearly. “I think he had a… mask that covered his mouth and one of his eyes, a hole for the other. It was white and had a swirl pattern on it.” </p><p>“Didn’t see that either, any other descriptions?” Nick continued to ask. </p><p>“He had, let me think, almond colored hair, if that makes sense?” He said. </p><p>“Eye color?” <br/>“I think it matches his hair.” </p><p>Nick was clearly frowning. “I think you’re describing Sir Jacobs, but I am certain that he does not like to be around very often. What about him makes you curious?” Nick didn’t sound like he was asking for duty purposes — instead, in the past hour or so, they’ve gotten closer and closer, and if not because of Nick’s guard-duties, they might able to get even closer. “He was just standing there and I got afraid,” He decided to lie. “That’s it, and I was curious.” </p><p>Dream looked at him slightly suspiciously, but Nick seemed to buy into the lie completely. He knew he couldn’t trick Dream into believing everything he said, but he simply thought that Nick didn’t need to know. </p><p>“That’s the feeling he gives off when Sir Frost is not around,” Nick shrugged. “Sir Frost is much more serious than he is; and when you ever see them together, you’ll know that Sir Jacobs is much warmer than he looks on his own.” </p><p>“I sure do hope I never see Sir Frost.” He mumbled. </p><p>“I’m sure you won’t get the chance to.” Nick said that as a statement. </p><p>—</p><p>The bell struck 10 times. </p><p>“The ball’s going to start soon.” Nick remarked. </p><p>Maids and servants began to move the tables out of the center of the room while bringing in a large, red gilded triangle piano with a pitch black base, reflecting the candlelight in different directions like the large top hat Daryl wore. Many Lords and Sirs all laid down their drinks or their desserts and held out hands to nearby ladies and the occasional gentleman, and as a pianist stood next to the long bench, everyone fell silent, waiting for the ball to start. </p><p>“Thank you, ladies and gentlemen, for joining today, on his Majesty’s behalf. My humble name is Floris and I will be your pianist for today.” The pianist announced, his high pitched voice echoed against the domed roof. He didn’t sound like his first language was English — some words sounded just the slightest bit off, like a discordant note executed perfectly. His orange ears, which poked out of his hat, slightly trembled as he pulled the bench away from the piano to sit down, took a deep breath in, and stepped on a pedal on the first note. </p><p>People started to elegantly flow gradually into the ball room. Lord Grayson and Lady Hannah took the center stage, slowly and beautifully turning in circles. Everyone was staring at their partner, and even though no one can see each other properly, they knew that someone was there, in front of them, and they all looked either amused or happy. </p><p>“You wanna dance too?” Dream whispered besides him. </p><p>“I don’t know how to.” That was not a lie. </p><p>“God, you fucking lovebirds.” That was Nick, complaining.<br/>“I can teach you.” </p><p>“How come you know?” He was genuinely curious. </p><p>“I just do,” Dream held out his hand, palm up. “Come on.” </p><p>He couldn’t resist. </p><p>“Fine.” Then he was pulled into the circle, one hand in Dream’s hand and the other on Dream’s elbow. Dream’s mask smiled stupidly, and he knew that on the inside, Dream was smiling in the same way too. </p><p>“Now just follow my movements.” Dream whispered. He did. </p><p>Soon enough, they became one of the many, pirouetting in the masquerade. For a while, they both forgot why they were there, what their original purpose was, the fact that they were still in custody of the royal guards and knights, the fact that the King was somewhere, watching them still; but the only thing they didn’t forget was who they were and who each other was. </p><p>When the music finally died, both of them were in love, as if everything happened all over again, but to a tune that flowed like a river: </p><p>Like a waterfall. </p><p>—</p><p>And before they know it, they were back in the small room the’ve spent together for two weeks. The walls and carpets now smelled like them, familiar yet unfamiliar. Nick was exhausted, so Callahan and another guard they couldn’t name guarded their room. </p><p>“I trust you guys,” Nick said before he left. “But if you try to break free I’ll still be here to kill ya’ll.” </p><p>The masks were now sticking to their faces, like it was glued on with sweat and the almost sickening sweet smell of all the desserts they managed to consume within the time frame of the masquerade. Dream untied his mask and tossed it onto the table, on which it slides and eventually fell onto the floor. He lifted his mask off from the top and gently hung it on the foot of the bed. </p><p>Dream’s face was blushing because of being in the mask for too long. “That was… fun.” </p><p>He couldn’t agree better. They turned their attention to the tub in the corner of the room, now filled with warm water someone must’ve poured in just minutes before they arrived. He turned to Dream, who was rubbing the red marks on his face with his index fingers. </p><p>He looked at the tub again.</p><p>Then at Dream. </p><p>“I’m not against it,” Dream smirked, he liked it whenever Dream pulled that expression on him. “If you’re not embarrassed and not going to blush like a little kid.” Dream took a step forward, pulling him into a close embrace.</p><p>“Shut up,” He said before going on tiptoes and holding Dream by the tie, just like when they were preparing for the masquerade. He didn’t kiss Dream; instead, he just held painstakingly close to Dream, waiting for his tall, blonde boy to initiate. </p><p>“You’re so annoying.” Dream muttered before moving his head forward, kissing him as if with every single bit of love in him. </p><p>He let out a beautiful breath which Dream definitely took as him egging Dream on. </p><p>—</p><p>?????</p><p>Dear Diary,</p><p>…………………….</p><p>Good night.</p><p>—</p><p>He woke up barely in any clothes but completely warm in Dream’s arms and under the cotton blankets. </p><p>Looking at Dream’s face, his mind flashed back to the conversation he had with Wimblur when they were still back at the bakery. </p><p>“It comes whenever I, I don’t know how to put it, but, um, it comes whenever I do something happy with Dream.” </p><p>Those were the exact words. </p><p>In Dream’s arms, he contemplated that phrase over and over again, thinking that maybe he was wrong: maybe that wasn’t the case, and it was all just a coincidence. Surely it’s not magic. </p><p>He shook it out of his mind and cuddled with Dream even more. With his face buried in Dream’s chest and taking a deep breath of what Dream smelled like — flowers — he could finally get it off his chest, making himself believe that what he thought was false. </p><p>Dream groaned, symbolizing his awakening. Dream stroked him lightly with his thumb but did not speak; both of them savoring the moment. He fondled with Dream’s chest with his cheeks, causing Dream to let out small breaths that clearly sounded like him holding in a laugh. <br/>“Good morning, my little sunshine,” Dream muttered as he moved a hand from his back into his hair, gently brushing the bits which were still wet from their lovely night before. Dream kissed his forehead gently before scooting down so their faces were on the same level. “Does your hip still hurt?”He had accidentally crashed his hip on the stone tub yesterday, no further explanation needed. </p><p>“It’s got a bruise, but I’ll be fine.” He said, smiling at Dream’s budding freckles and a speck just under Dream’s right eye. </p><p>“Lemme see.” Dream looked down on his waist, and frowned. </p><p>“What…” He looked down too, and that’s when his dreams shattered. The shadows did come, last night, in a different way than usual. They didn’t wake him up, didn’t wake Dream up, somehow managed to sneak past the guards — or maybe they simply didn’t appear. </p><p>There were black — pitch black claw marks on his waist and hip as if a beast of the shadows pounced at him and took him down during his sleep.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0016"><h2>16. Wonderland pt.15</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Short chapter... I would see myself wrapping this thing up pretty soon... School has started and it’s killing me so I don’t really know...</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Fuck,” Dream swore under his breathe. “That doesn’t look good at all.” Both of them gradually sat up. Dream tentatively touched the marks. </p><p>They were tough, like old skin of a crocodile’s, crawling on his hips, eating him alive. He was mildly shaking, trembling from the feeling that creeped up his spine from just looking at the marks. His eyes were fixed on those marks; he couldn’t take his gaze off them. The black strikes were just too terrifying.</p><p>“Close your eyes,” Dream said. “Take deep breaths. You’re panicking.” </p><p>He did what Dream said. One breath in: his nose wafted in scents of Dream and him; Two breaths in: the fresh air which peeped through the window reminded him of the forest and the waterfall, and although that reminded him of the last time the shadows came, his mind decided to calm down; he sighed. </p><p>Dream was holding him in his arms, a hand on his head and the other on his waist. His chin was pressed against Dream’s strong shoulder, breathing just onto his skin. </p><p>“Dream,” He cried a tearless sob. Dream clutched onto him closer. “I’m scared.” </p><p>Dream didn’t have an answer. </p><p>“I…” Dream stuttered. “Don’t say anything.” He sobbed again, holding tighter and tighter onto Dream. Dream held him firmly too, giving him the support he needed. </p><p>“What are you scared of,” Dream whispered. “Tell me about it.” </p><p>“Every time I feel like I love you more,” He whimpered softly. “They come. And I can’t fight against them, and they try to kill me, scar me, and even though I don’t want to die,  I know that I want you too. I don’t know, Dream.” A tear dropped from his right eye. Dream didn’t say anything and just held onto him. </p><p>“Does it hurt?” Dream whispered. </p><p>He didn’t even have time to think about it. <br/>“It stings.” He said.</p><p>Dream stayed silent. </p><p>“Tell me… tell me what you want me to do.”“I don’t know.” He found himself saying, again. </p><p>It seems as if he had been clueless all along — and that’s true. He felt as if he had always been a lost child, forgetting his identity, why he was ever there, where they were, ignoring his responsibilities, not doing what he was supposed to, not answering questions directed at him, making Dream make decisions Dream shouldn’t do, or more of just trusting and falling in love with someone he met in a forest who saved him from the same shadows that ended up almost killing him. </p><p>“Snap out of it,” Dream hushed. He realized he was panicking again. “You’re breathing faster than you should.” </p><p>“Dream, I…” He just needed to open his mouth to say something, but no words came out. </p><p>“If you want to stop the shadows, then give me up. It’s alright.” </p><p>—</p><p>?????</p><p>I couldn’t handle it anymore. Sometimes, my conscious mind comes into play and slaps my face, even inside a dream. I knew it couldn’t last. Dreams are meant to fade away; although I want it to stay. </p><p>“Just, stay.”</p><p>—</p><p>“Don’t do that,” Someone spoke up before neither of them could. Both of them jerked their heads to see where the voice was coming from and to their right they saw a man with eerie, purple mutton chops and a butler’s suit sitting on their chair, crossing his leg and facing them directly. Dream pulled the blanket over them. </p><p>“Who the fuck are you?” Dream challenged, taking his shirt which he had hung on the foot of the bed and quickly threw it on himself. </p><p>“Well,” The man’s cat ears trembled. “I don’t think I have to answer that question.” </p><p>“And why the fuck are you here?” Dream asked again; he was still sobbing on the side.“I mean, first, they wanted to kill me so I needed to go somewhere, but I heard panicking, so thus I am here,” He literally purred. “I’m Johnathan Cheshire, by the way.” </p><p>“What do you mean by ‘don’t do that’?” He spoke up. He needed to know. <br/>“What if I told you that in this world, things can be fake?” Johnathan didn’t answer his question. </p><p>“What do you mean?” He asked again. </p><p>“I mean,” Johnathan twirled his tail. “I mean… let me ask you a question: would you ever die from a bad dream?” </p><p>“You’re saying I’m making this all up — that I’m not real, Dream’s not real, Nick’s not real, you’re not real, this world, this kingdom are all not real?” He clarified. </p><p>“Well, I mean, take it as a madman saying mad words — why do you think the King’s hunting me down?” The cat man purred again.</p><p>“What the fuck are you-” Dream growled. </p><p>“Shhhhh, ‘masked man,’ or should I call you Cl…” Johnathan squinted. </p><p>“Shut up.” Dream snapped. </p><p>“So are you saying,” He interrupted. “I’m not going to die because of this?” </p><p>“Take it as a madman saying mad words.” Johnathan repeated before staring at the door and disappearing. </p><p>The moment he melted into thin air, the door to their chamber busted open, revealing Nick with a giant spear. </p><p>“Apologies, good sirs,” Nick said. “But have you seen a suspicious individual?” </p><p>Dream shook his head. “I don’t recall anyone busting into the room other than you, Nick. Shouldn’t you know who’s been in this room, since y’all are guarding the door?” </p><p>Nick sighed. “The King wants someone; please tell me if you ever see a purple cat with a menacing smile.” </p><p>“Not a surprise that they meant Johnathan.” He thought to himself.</p><p>“Sure.” Dream nodded. </p><p>Nick turned over and left the room. Dream turned back to him, holding both his hands in his palms and looking deep into his eyes. </p><p>So green. </p><p>“I won’t die, right?” His voice was shakier than he had originally thought he would sound.</p><p>“I can’t promise you that.” Dream sounded too disappointed.</p><p>“Dream, when Wimblur asked me whether if I actually love you, I couldn’t answer that question because I was making a decision for someone else,” He took a deep breath.</p><p>“Slow down, slow down if you need to.” Dream comforted him. He smiled in return. </p><p>“I… You know… and as the days passed, I want to tell you that I love you more and more, and you’re too much to me to just, you know, give it up and, you know, leave.” He stuttered. </p><p>“What if I’m not real?” Dream blurted. He hadn’t thought about that question. </p><p>He thought for a moment. </p><p>“I don’t actually care.” He whispered. “To be honest, I don’t actually care.” <br/>“Me neither.” Dream pulled him into another embrace. Dream’s heartbeat calmed him down, little by little, just like when the shadows came for the second time.</p><p>He pulled back and leaned forward again in a different position to kiss Dream. Their lips touched, both of them still warm from the tears splattered on their faces and fair skin. “If there’s one last thing I want to forget,” He whispered. “It’ll be the consequences of loving you.” He found himself tearing up again, but neither of them wanted to mind it. Instead, they found themselves kissing one more time, this time it took forever. </p><p>“I love you.” </p><p>“I love you too.”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0017"><h2>17. Wonderland pt. 16</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hmmmm I’m losing what I want to write for this novel......</p><p>By the way I wrote this during George’s alt stream. DNF for the fucking win!!!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>A meeting. </p><p>He was invited to a meeting. </p><p>He, as in, on his own, was invited to a meeting. Dream was requested to stay out of it, and was invited to a walk by Nick while Callahan leaded him from his room to the meeting hall. </p><p>The marks on his waist disappeared whenever someone other than Dream or him could see it, but the pain remains, constantly reminding him of something he kept on trying to forget. The silent squire noticed his abnormalities but decided not to do anything about it — though it may be because he had no pen and couldn’t speak. </p><p>They went through multiple corridors, some too large and some too small, and into another section of the building which he hadn’t been on. The walls were completely made of red bricks and chains and the flooring pattern was a weird grid made of something close to wood. His shoes made knocking sounds when the soles and the ground collided, somehow making him feel uncomfortable. </p><p>Callahan gestured to a large door at the end fo the hallway. He whispered a word of appreciation before going in, leaving Callahan on the other side and revealing a large table with no one there. </p><p>A chair on the far right in a distant corner was marked “The Nameless Boy” with red ink on a piece of masking tape. On his side were different styles of chairs, some simple, others high backed with weird combinations of colors. The one right in front of him was a pink chair that reminded him of unicorns. </p><p>“We meet again.” Someone remarked behind him; he turned around and saw the same suit he saw at the masquerade — purple with a cyan sleeve. Sir Jacobs had no mask on, revealing a face with soft features but a cold, blood-craving stare. </p><p>He felt compelled to answer Sir Jacobs with something: anything. “Don’t scare the man please.” Another voice rose from the other side of the room. He turned his head and saw an anthropomorphic siamese cat in a dark green suit. His eyes widened. </p><p>“You’re the scary one, Anthony.” Sir Jacobs behind him purred.</p><p>“So the cat is Sir Frost, the scary advisor.” He thought to himself. Sir Frost found his seat and sat down, holding a cup of tea elegantly, and stopped looking at him and Sir Jacobs. He was trembling under his suit, unknowing what to do. </p><p>“Sit and wait.” Sir Frost ordered both of them. As he pulled out his chair, Sir Jacobs chuckled and walked to the other side too and sat right in front of Sir Frost. Sir Frost merely looked up for a split second before sipping his tea again. </p><p>“Don’t be so mean,” Sir Jacobs swung his legs under the table. “We’ve got someone new today, isn’t that fun?” Sir Jacob’s eyes drifted towards him, and he couldn’t help but look down on the table, and suddenly his claw marks became a much more interesting thing to focus on. </p><p>“Shut up.” Sir Frost laid his teacup on the table, making the sound of a bell. Sir Jacobs chuckled again, humming as if he was thinking about something utterly weird. </p><p>Someone else entered the room: Lord Grayson and Lady Hannah, he recognized. They sat together in the middle of the table, not saying a word. Both of them looked at him for a split second and looked back elsewhere again. He didn’t want them talking to him either. </p><p>As time progressed, more and more people entered. Sir Manifold sat besides him, giving him a gentle wave. Luke was on the other side too, right next to Sir Frost, who didn’t really care. Every other seat was filled with people too, whom he didn’t recall seeing anywhere else, except for the unicorn chair in front of him. </p><p>It seems as if none of them knew why they were there. </p><p>“Hmph,” A person suddenly appeared in the chair in front of him, without anyone noticing; no one was shocked that a person was there, though. “I see.” </p><p>The person had a splitting face — like the Yin Yang — his eyes were red and green, matching his complexion perfectly and almost giving him a seizure if his eyes had glowed. Bells and ribbons hung all across his suit as if he was a gift being wrapped up. </p><p>The man climbed onto the table, staring straight into his eyes, and for that second he could not move. He was stuck on his chair as if pinned to it. </p><p>“So you are the man.” The half colored man said, completely ignoring the entire setting of the room. </p><p>“You are…?” He whispered. </p><p>“I am Ranboo,” The man exclaimed. “The Jester.” </p><p>“Oh. No wonder.” He thought. </p><p>“What do you have for us today, Sir Ranboo.” Someone else in the room spoke. Ranboo instantly leapt up and started pacing around on the table. He could head the bells on his ankle jingling with each step he took. </p><p>“Oh no, I just wanted to talk to everyone about, well, about the croquet.” The Jester smiled oddly and looking around the room. </p><p>“Then some of us don’t need to be here.” Lord Grayson growled. Lady Hannah simply nodded besides him. </p><p>He nodded too. </p><p>“No, no, no. If there’s one person who needs to be here, it’s you.” Ranboo pointed straight at his temple. He felt everyone’s eyes on him: he blushed hard and gripped onto his pants. </p><p>“What do you mean?” Sir Jacobs asked the Jester. </p><p>“Well,” He pronounced. “You’re important.” Ranboo still faced him, unfaltering. </p><p>“What do you mean?” Sir Frost repeated. </p><p>“I know what the King wants from the kid,” Ranboo chuckled. “And I think you should know too.” </p><p>—</p><p>He returned to his room finding it to be completely empty except for a letter lying on his pillow. He lit up the fireplace and sat next to it on his chair, staring at the flames and thinking about the meeting. He couldn’t figure out what Ranboo meant, and for some sort of reason he didn’t want to prod. The letter crumpled in his fingers, harmonizing with the crackling fire. He didn’t feel like opening it just yet, especially when he felt a piece of hair — cat hair — in the seal. </p><p>—</p><p>The sun was already setting outside. “Time past too fast when you’re thinking about shit.” He thought to himself as he moved his chair back, lit the lamps, and tore open the letter. </p><p>“Think about your choices, boy. You choose one path to go down and don’t think about the other ones. Maybe this would help you feel better.” </p><p>Those were the only things in the letter besides another clump of cat fur. </p><p>“This guy’s trying to get me caught red handed.” He thought. The door creaked open and his first reaction was to hide the envelope under the pillow. He didn’t want anyone to know, yet, what the cat meant before he finds out himself. </p><p>“Hey,” It was Dream. “How was your day?” </p><p>“Let’s just say that I don’t like meetings, especially about something I literally don’t know.” “What are they talking about?” </p><p>“Croquet and me, apparently.” He sighed. </p><p>“Hm,” Dream thought. “What about… your hip?”He brought up what he thought about during the time he spent besides the fire, warming his mind up. </p><p>“Just don’t mention it. Forget it. You’re here and it’s what matters,” He smiled. Dream smiled too and stopped talking for the next few minutes and just sat on bed, looking at each other. The fire crackled again as if complaining about third wheeling, but they didn’t seem to care. </p><p>—</p><p>He fell asleep instantly inside Dream’s arms, and until then he didn’t realize he was very, very tired. </p><p>In the dream he was somewhere else, and everything was strangely somehow familiar to him eve though he knew he probably hadn’t been there before. In his dream, he remembered walking down a long path, leading to nowhere. </p><p>In the dream, he remembered then going into a room and sitting on a black chair against something glowing, and he couldn’t remember whether if the glow was actually there but he was staring straight at it. </p><p>It seemed so tranquil and peaceful and filled with love and hope. Someone was talking to him through something, and he was smiling in the dream too. </p><p>—</p><p>His leg was crossed completely on Dream’s hip when he woke up. Dream was still sleeping, although he looked like he was struggling to do something in his dream. He stroked Dream’s hair quietly and Dream muttered something illegible back to him. </p><p>The sun shone through the window and hitting their blanket, showering them in light. </p><p>The croquet match was set for a day later, during tea, in the forest. Even though Daryl and Zak were there 25 hours every day and the King dislikes them both, they decided to set them there anyways. </p><p>They say the King wants him alive and wants to talk to him, but he didn’t know why; except for the Jester or maybe the cat who left the letter for him. For now, he would rather not think about it, because it would help him with nothing, only drag him down, make him worried about what would happen to him in the future. </p><p>“Good morning,” Dream muttered, though he clearly looked as if he was still sleeping. “Any plans today?”“No,” He replied, rubbing Dream’s eyelids with his left thumb. “Tomorrow though. We’re invited to the croquet.” Dream reached out to put him in his arms. “So we get to cuddle today.” </p><p>“Dream,” He suddenly thought of something. “What happens if I remember who I am?” </p><p>Dream didn’t respond at first. “I don’t know,” This time it was his turn to say that. “I guess we’ll find out someday.” Dream slid his hands under his shirt, stroking his black marks with his thumb like a comforting move. </p><p>Dream’s hands were cold, but it was what he needed. </p><p>—</p><p>?????</p><p>Dear Diary,</p><p>I had a terrible feeling that it was going to end once it happens. </p><p>Good night. </p><p>—</p><p>They danced again in their room. </p><p>“Why, all of a sudden?” He asked Dream, who proposed it. </p><p>“Gut feelings,” Dream answered. “That I need to dance with you again, here.” </p><p>“Why, are we going to die or something like that?” He joked. Dream didn’t like that joke, clearly, and responded with a frown. It made him slightly worried for a sudden. </p><p>Dream held him by the hands. “Come on.” So he did — just like during the masquerade but better, now that they could see their faces clearly. He went on tiptoes so their heights were closer. </p><p>Dream hummed the song the pianist played back during the dance. They moved to the beat, and although Dream occasionally stumbled on high or notes too low, neither of them minded, and just looked at each other.</p><p>“I'm not here to disappoint you or anything, just so you know.” Dream whispered. </p><p>—</p><p>“I wonder what Wimblur and Niki are doing now.” He said, lying half on top of Dream’s thigh. </p><p>“I wonder if they’re together now.” Dream said, putting his hand on his chest. </p><p>“I wonder, um, if they know, or will I find out my name tomorrow, or anything like that.” He whispered a question to himself. </p><p>“I wonder too,” Dream stroked his hair. “I guess we’ll know.” </p><p>—</p><p>He didn’t know what expect from the croquet. </p><p>—</p><p>He decided to not expect anything, if that was better for him.</p><p>—</p><p>If the shadows will come again, be it, because he was ready to take it, because he decided to choose a path and carry on.</p><p>And that path was Dream.</p><p>—</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0018"><h2>18. Wonderland pt.17</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm<br/>Follow me on twitter(?)<br/>@FraustHaruka</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>—</p><p>?????</p><p>—</p><p>Sunset and sunrise, he couldn’t tell the difference. Maybe it was because he just had a feeling that the next day wouldn’t end well. Something was tickling the back of his neck, and he couldn’t ignore it nor bring it to the surface. </p><p>Dream was cuddled on the bed like a cat napping, legs curled up in his hands and sleeping sideways. He, on the other hand, was sat on the table, trying to put his thoughts into words, and somehow it was all blurry even after the hours and hours of just sitting next to the wall. The shadow scars on his waist seemed to think the same thing: they ached the same way as his head did and he found it hard to focus. </p><p>Dream mumbled something in his sleep — it sounded something close to a meaningless groan, although he didn’t really pay attention. He turned his chair to look at Dream while he thought, thinking that it might be better if he could turn his attention to at least something.</p><p>The King wanted him there for a game that he knew won’t do him any good, yet the King did it anyways. There was no reason for the King to do that unless…</p><p>“He wants me to know something.” He didn’t mean to say it out loud. </p><p>“Who and what?” Dream rubbed his eyes and suddenly said. </p><p>“Oh,” He was surprised. “How was your sleep, Dream?” He squeezed a smile at Dream.</p><p>“Don’t tell me you haven’t rested.” Dream frowned. </p><p>He looked away.</p><p>“You look tired,” Dream climbed up from bed and walked towards him in no shoes. “You need to rest — it’s dawn now and was in the afternoon when I decided to sleep.” </p><p>“I was thinking about stuff,” He protested. “And it’s… unnerving, to say the least.” </p><p>“What is?” Dream sat down on the chair besides him, facing him. </p><p>He felt uneasy. “The fact that the King wants me, and you, there today. The feeling, it’s like someone tickling the back of my neck and I don’t know who.” </p><p>Dream nodded. </p><p>“I think he knows,” He shuffled in his chair. “I think he wants me to know.” “And what do you think about that.” Dream put his head on his hands, propped up on the table. </p><p>“The simple answer is that I’m hellishly scared,” he shrugged. “The complicated answer has way more than that.” </p><p>“And…?”</p><p>“Well, I still want to know.” He felt like that was what Dream was asking for. Dream nodded in response and leaned back in his chair. </p><p>“We still have a few hours, I believe,” Dream noted. “You need to rest and we’ll cuddle.” That sounded like more of an order than a suggestion, but he didn’t really care as he stood up, pushed his chair in like an elementary school child, and laid on bed shortly after. </p><p>Dream stroked his hair and occasionally his nose as he closed his eyes and at least tried to fall asleep, knowing that Dream would’ve wanted that too.</p><p>—</p><p>He dreamt of another world — everything around him had dull, yellowish colors. Trees were all different shades of yellow or gray and it all seemed just a little bit more boring than what he remembered to see. He was talking to someone, but he couldn’t see the person: only blaring light that his eyes were somehow used to seeing.</p><p>He was looking at himself in third person: in the dream he was smiling brightly at the vague shape of light while leaning comfortably in a black, boring chair. He would occasionally take a sip of whatever’s on the desk in front of him — he couldn’t tell what drink it was.</p><p>He couldn’t recall any word he said but could clearly remember his laughter; it was so sunny, so bright, and it pains him to not know about why he was laughing that hard.</p><p>He was jealous.</p><p>—</p><p>“Are you awake yet?” Dream was shaking him gently by the shoulders. </p><p>“I am now,” He mumbled and rubbed his eyes, realizing that he had been crying in his dream. “Is it time?” “Not really, I hear sounds by the door so it must be in the near future,” Dream whispered. “But saw you crying and I don’t want you to… cry from a bad dream.” Dream placed his arms around him and hugged tighter. </p><p>“Thank you,” He hugged back. “Thank you, Dream.” </p><p>He didn’t want to talk more. </p><p>—</p><p>“No formal clothing,” Nick said. “Apparently that’s what his Majesty wants.” </p><p>Nick was also wearing something different than what he would usually wear as a guard. Instead of a giant cloak with metal armor with fire patterns, he was in a plain shirt and black pants, almost identical to Dream and his. </p><p>“So you’re invited too.” Dream commented. Nick nodded. </p><p>“Finally I can do something other than standing in front of someone’s door or walking around the whole building doing nothing in particular,” Nick winked. “Now come on, it’s not polite to keep others waiting.” </p><p>“I would never keep a King waiting, just so you know.” He mumbled under his breath. Dream caught it and huffed a laugh.</p><p>Dream put a hand on his shoulder and he put his hand on Dreams. Dream squeezed slightly and he returned it. Nick caught a glance of it and instantly rolled his eyes. </p><p>“Come on,” Nick complained. “It’s just a croquet match. You won’t even be playing — you’re just watching and drinking tea or some shit,” Nick turned and opened the door for the two. “Let’s go.”</p><p>—</p><p>The hallway was longer than he thought it was, or maybe he was just seeing things. He couldn’t tell. </p><p>The croquet match was to be held in the garden in the forest, and to get there they would have to go through the entire city. Nick mentioned that the King will be setting off shortly so it was best if they walked faster. </p><p>Dream kept on looking down to the nicely paved ground as they walked across people: without his mask, looked different in public — a shy man, nothing else. He reached for Dream’s hand and held his fingers, and that seemed to help just a little. On the other hand, he was looking around, not because he was that interested but because he wanted to look for someone. </p><p>At a specific stretch of the road, they could see a small alleyway which led directly towards the bakery. They used that alley when they first came, when he carried Dream back to the bakery where Wimblur and Niki hosted them for a few short days. A man in a yellow sweater and a deep red beanie stood at the door, holding a small harp in his hand. At the sight of Dream and him, the man suddenly jerked up and waved. </p><p>He gently nudged Dream, and when Dream raise his head he pointed towards the waving Wimblur and they waved back at him. Wimblur rushed into the bakery, possibly to bring Niki outside. They caught the door opening again, but as Niki came out of the bakery, they were already passing that alleyway, missing her by barely an inch.  </p><p>—</p><p>“Welcome,” The Jester was sitting on a chair next to a fancy long table. “I expected you to come this early.” The Jester was directly talking to him, ignoring Nick, Dream, and every other guard who escorted them. “Thank you for giving me so much trust,” He tried to reply politely. “You’re going to have to thank Nick for this though.” Nick eyed him as if telling him that that wasn’t the correct thing to say, but the Jester merely laughed at the comment. </p><p>“You’re funny,” The Jester shook his wrist, bells ringing. “No wonder he likes you.” </p><p>“Oh, so the King wants me to show up because he ‘likes me.’” He thought to himself, half irritated. </p><p>“Please take a seat and feel free to eat or talk or whatever,” Someone else on the side said, distracting them from talking to the Jester. He thanked that person from the heart — the Jester scared him.</p><p>Dream and him both decided to sit further away from the Jester while Nick went to talk with someone else on the other side of the open garden. </p><p>There were flamingos and hedgehogs roaming around the garden like no one cared, and they felt as if neither should them except for a few which got too close to their heads or feet, which then they shooed away as many as possible. </p><p>“This feels so damn weird.” Dream mumbled under his breath. He nodded in agreement, hands on his laps and sitting oddly straightly for a person like him. Dream seemed a little more relaxed. </p><p>Soon enough, people poured in, and at a certain point of time, every chair was filled except for the throne in the middle — there were even knights on the sides of the throne, yet the King wouldn’t show up. </p><p>The Jester shot up on his chair. “Well, well, well. Since we’re all here, let the match begin, shall we?”</p><p>“But the King isn’t here, right?” He whispered quietly to Dream besides him, who was obviously tensing up way more than he should. He frowned at Dream’s reaction, and turned slowly towards him. “What’s the matter?” </p><p>Dream didn’t say a word. </p><p>The Jester was looking straight at him. </p><p>“You’re playing,” The Jester giggled, and suddenly his chair disappeared. “Come on.” </p><p>“Wait, what?” He found himself floating in the middle of the air, almost launching straight at the middle of the field. Everyone else was still, on their chairs, except for Dream and Nick: the former looked as if he wanted to fight everyone else in the room and the latter looked plainly confused. </p><p>“Come on, isn’t this what you wanted?” The Jested laughed even harder, his voice piercing straight in to his ears. </p><p>“I didn’t want-“ His mouth was muffled by the air. </p><p>“Oh really?” </p><p>He landed on the patch of grass on his butt, directly under the Jester’s feet. The man with the split face kneeled down on one knee and held his chin gently by his index finger. He dared not move and looked at Dream. </p><p>Dream was on the verge of pouncing too. <br/>The Jester let go. “Didn’t they tell you what becomes of curious minds?” </p><p>—</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0019"><h2>19. Wonderland pt.18</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I am reading way more than I should rn<br/>Also on a side note I hate complex numbers</p><p>//panic attacks if you are worried :)</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>—</p><p>He didn’t understand it. </p><p>He panicked. </p><p>He panicked even more when the Jester hopped slowly and gradually towards the throne, and amid everyone’s sight, he sat down crossed legged and one arm supporting his head. </p><p>“Tell me,” The Jester cooed. “Do you want to know?” </p><p>The people around him started talking, whispering, mumbling about him. He glanced towards Dream, who froze on his chair. </p><p>He panicked, again, and gulped. “I… I don’t know what you mean.” </p><p>“Oh, come on,” The Jester purred in response. “You know perfectly what I mean.”</p><p>He looked at Dream again. The green eyed man just plainly shivered on his chair. He mouthed “help” and the only thing Dream could do was mouth “I don’t know” back. He looked towards the Jester again, who was impatiently playing around with his fingers. </p><p>“What do you have to offer?” He scowled. The Jester seemed to smirk even more. </p><p>“Well, well, well.” The Jester changed crossed a different leg. He put his hand over his face and it morphed, briefly it was a jumble of glitch before his face changed into what looks like his own.</p><p>He gasped.</p><p>“I am the Red King,” The man on the throne bellowed. “And so are you.” </p><p>“What do you-” It was Dream who spoke up. The King, wearing his face, pointed at Dream with a slender finger and Dream instantly froze in place, unable to talk, move, and barely could breathe. </p><p>“Put him down.” He snapped without thinking. The King raised a brow — it was disgusting to see his own face pull an expression like that for doing something he disliked — and flicked his finger upwards, releasing Dream in a whim. Dream collapsed in his chair. </p><p>“Relax,” The King purred. “He can’t die here — I control everything, and frankly so do you.”“What do you mean?” He gripped his palms into fists and looked straight into the eyes which looked so much like his own. </p><p>“I’m surprised you still haven’t figured it out,” The King huffed. “But in case you didn’t know, this place, this world, is merely just a dream of yours and mine.”</p><p>“Like I thought.” He heard Dream whisper. </p><p>“You’re saying I made this world up,” He asked. “You’re overestimating me.” </p><p>The King chuckled. “Oh no I’m not.”</p><p>“What are you implying?” He asked. </p><p>“Give me some time, I’ll get to it.” The King sounded frustrated. He walked slowly down the path from the throne to stare straight at him. They were the exact same height, their builds were exactly the same — so they were the same person after all — but the King seemed much older, much wiser. </p><p>He hissed right into his own face. </p><p>“If this is what you wanted,” The King tilted his head from left to right and back straight. “then I will tell you my name; your name.”</p><p>His eyes widened with fear. “I’m not ready-”</p><p>The King lifted a finger to his chin. “I didn’t ask you whether if you were,” He cooed. “It’s George, George Henry Davidson — you’re 24 years old, you’re born in Brighton, Britain, you’re a minecraft youtuber, you wanted something you thought you couldn’t get, you wanted someone you thought you couldn’t own.”</p><p>And it all went black.</p><p>—</p><p>It was all black and dark and filled with screaming. His knees buckled under him and he couldn’t help but fall onto the ground, hopeless like a ragged doll in need of someone to pick him up. </p><p>He could feel the world crumbling around him — like stale butter biscuits falling in between a child’s fingers when he tries to eat them out of the jar — tumbling down into the oblivion, void of gravity, as he keeps falling and falling. Something sweet just ended — his world, his dream, just crumbled beneath his legs, his feet. </p><p>More voices came chanting on the side and he could do nothing but cover his ears. The scars on his waist ached more as the shadows that surrounded him shouted, cried the words “stay with us” straight into his ears. He screamed nonsense back at them, hoping to ward them away but it was useless. The sphere of shadows loomed closer and closer, tightening up on him like it was a small, black, doorless room, chaining him to the ground, keeping him in. </p><p>He couldn’t breathe. </p><p>—</p><p>?????</p><p>I couldn’t wake up. </p><p>It was like being caught in a daydream, but a nightmare instead. </p><p>The world around me disappeared: Sapnap — Nick — disintegrated into nothing but ashes and so did everyone else. The King gave me one last look before fading too, and what it left me was just a completely dark world. </p><p>There were screams and shouts in the distance, but I couldn’t figure out where. I tried to look for him, for anyone, for anything, but it was all useless. I couldn’t see anything, making it impossible for me to move around the space. </p><p>I heard his high pitched screams, and although I know sometimes I think it to be funny, this time it seemed to be filled with complete terror. </p><p>I scream his name again and again, hoping that somewhere, he would hear me.</p><p>—</p><p>He heard a familiar voice shouting a name. </p><p>Not his name, he refuses to accept it as his name. </p><p>The shadows still kept him nameless, and it seemed as if it was the last barrier keeping him from waking up completely — his name, his identity. He wanted to forget it, he wanted to stay forever, because it was happy.</p><p>He was remembering more. </p><p>He remembered how he would talk to Dream through headphones, joking about something that really didn’t matter. Deep down, he always knew he had feelings for him, but every time he joked about it Dream would always reply with a ridiculous comment that rendered his hopes into nothing but small, pitiful thoughts in the depths of his mind. </p><p>The dreams were better. </p><p>In this world he could stay with Dream, even though everything he saw there was unreal — Wimblur and Niki, Phil and the boys, Ranboo, Punz, Purpled, Hannah, Puffy, Sapnap, himself, even Dream: he knew that Dream was also fake, but even so he wanted to have Dream for just a little longer. </p><p>It was too early for him to leave.</p><p>He still wanted to do more with Dream — spend more time with him, under the sunset on the plains, looking at the skies, the shooting stars, kissing next to a campfire, knowing each other was there. </p><p>There was just so much color. </p><p>He was shedding tears, too many tears. If this were in real life he would’ve passed out, but the shadows were still waiting for an answer from him, to stay or to leave, to forget or to remember. </p><p>The tears fell through the floor. </p><p>“Help me.” He whimpered, and that’s when he heard Dream’s voice echoing through the space, tearing through the shadows. </p><p>“George,” Dream called. “I’m here!” </p><p>He looked up, his tears suddenly stopped. </p><p>“Dream.” He whimpered, knowing that Dream probably wouldn’t hear him. He needed Dream’s company — he craved it, even knowing that he was fake, just a fragment of  his own imagination but he needed it so bad it didn’t matter. </p><p>Just as he was thinking, someone ripped through the shadows. A man so green.</p><p>—</p><p>?????</p><p>He was so broken, and I couldn’t help but imagine how this would be if it was in real life, if he had actually been on the ground, in so much pain and tears dropping down his pale skin, his white-washed cheeks barely with any sign of life. </p><p>I kneeled down in front of him, holding him in my arms, as if careful not to break a vase. </p><p>“Dream?” He whimpered. </p><p>“I’m here.” I answered.</p><p>“What do I do?” He asked with a tear.</p><p>—</p><p>“George,” Dream whispered in his ears. “Calm down.” </p><p>“I don’t want to leave you here Dream.” He cried. </p><p>“You’re not going to.” Dream answered. </p><p>He looked into Dream’s eyes. So, so green. </p><p>“I want to see you, I want to hug you, Dream.” He whimpered. He clawed onto Dream’s arms, pulling himself onto Dream’s chest. </p><p>“You can’t stay here any longer George,” Dream whispered. “You’re pale, I don’t like seeing you like this, George.” <br/>“Will I see you again?” He managed to ask.</p><p>“You will,” Dream pulled him into a soft, small kiss he had been waiting for, longing for for so long. “You will. I promise.” </p><p>He mumbled as he kissed Dream back. </p><p>“I love you, George.” Dream said.</p><p>And it all disappeared. </p><p>—</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0020"><h2>20. Wonderland pt.19</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Wakes Up.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I am so sorry I took so long... school is very demanding and I hate modulus.<br/>Chapter contains panic attacks (i think)</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>?????</p><p>My dream popped open, like a hot air balloon not meant to be flying since the beginning of flight, like a bird too young to taste the air and falls after it flaps its wings for the first time. Shadows turned into light, and then I realized it was just me waking up, seeing the sunlight shine through the blinds of my room, Patches purring at my foot.</p><p>I was crying in my dream — I could still taste the salt on my lips, feel the dried marks on my cheek — and now I know exactly why I was. Patches must’ve felt it too; at the sound of me waking up she crawled over to lie on my chest. </p><p>“I’m alright, it’s just a dream.” I whispered as I raised my right hand to pet her, feeling something on my side as I did so. I picked it up — it was hard, jagged, and I almost hurt my hand on the sides. I raised it in front of my eyes to see better:</p><p>It was a shard of a mask, a plastic one, white, like the one I lost in my dream, and at the thought of it I jerked up, accidentally throwing Patches to my side, her screeching in defiance, and cried my heard out again. </p><p>The thought of him never being able to know what I went through pains me more, even knowing the main character of the dream was not me, but him.</p><p>If only.</p><p>—</p><p>He fell and hit the ground — his spine snapping upon contact, even though there wasn’t a hole in the ceiling, and he hadn’t dropped from heaven but straight from hell. </p><p>He was dying, if not dead already. </p><p>He didn’t want to wake up. </p><p>“It doesn’t mean the world wants to rip you of something. It gives you more possibilities.” Phil’s voice still rung inside his skull. He tried to push it out forcefully but it pressed down like an anvil crushing his poor mind. <br/>He lost something — he lost a lot, everything, more like. He needed everything back, and thinking that the world had ripped him off something didn’t help either. What possibilities did he earn from remembering everything and losing what he had just gotten? </p><p>“Nothing.” He thought silently to himself. </p><p>Absolutely nothing at all. </p><p>—</p><p>He crawled out of his sheets at midnight. Coming back to real life seemed more like a bad dream than the dream itself. The colors were duller — as if he was colorblind — and on second thought he was actually color blind, but his dreams were in screaming color. He got hungry faster, and as he tripped and stumbled across the room to the kitchen to open the fridge, he found nothing but a few dried and crumpled fruits and frozen pizza which he couldn’t bother to bake for an hour. He filled a lingering glass with water and ice before he almost collapsed on the ground, drinking and sobbing at the same time. </p><p>God, he was a mess. </p><p>His stomach rumbled in protest, almost yelling at him for the poor choice of food, and he forced himself up to reach for the frozen food, throwing them in the oven before he had a chance to doubt himself, and went back to sitting next to the humming heating oven and crumpled into a small ball of nothingness. </p><p>His light blue shirt — his own merch — was stained with his own sweat and tears. He smelled awful, but he didn’t feel like changing out of it. His skin stung lightly, knowing it must be because he hadn’t gotten enough sunlight in the past month of waking for short hours just to stream and going straight to bed. </p><p>“You’re a mess,” He muttered to himself. “…George.” </p><p>He choked on his own name. </p><p>It didn’t feel right, not that he hadn’t been using that name, George Henry Davidson, for twenty four years now, but that dream, the one which merely lasted a night for the past month or so, changed what he felt about himself. </p><p>“Are you George?” He asked his reflection in the oven glass. The oven humming back at him as if not willing to give a definitive answer. </p><p>He stared at himself in silence, thinking about nothing in particular. There was too much to think about that he ignored them all together and threw them out of the window. His thoughts landed in a swamp in the depths of his brain with a silent “ding” as the oven ringed, ripping his body from his mind. </p><p>He ate, and it started raining. </p><p>—</p><p>He long-pressed the power off button the sixteenth time his phone rang. He didn’t bother to check who it was, knowing it couldn’t be good. </p><p>George Henry Davidson had been sitting on his couch all day. He hadn’t checked any social media, didn’t bother to stream, and it never crossed his mind that he needed to check something like discord — he simply wanted time for himself. </p><p>“It’s alright,” He comforted himself. “It’s not even that big of a deal.” </p><p>It wasn’t. It didn’t make sense. He just had a bad dream — it didn’t deserve a mental breakdown: to be clear, it didn’t deserve to even be pondered upon; but every single second he found himself going back and forth from the details to the dream to what everyone said and getting angrier and angrier when he failed to recall a certain detail. </p><p>Dreams were meant to fade away, right? </p><p>The rain hadn’t stopped, not that he bothered to care about the continuous sounds of water hitting his windowpane like someone was tapping on it relentlessly, harshly, full of emotion. </p><p>The sky was crying. </p><p>And at that thought he melted into tears again, completely putting aside the fact that his eyes that were too swollen to be crying again, or that his throat was sorer than the last time he had a bad fever — which was almost three years ago. </p><p>“Pathetic.” He thought. </p><p>“Pathetic.” </p><p>Pathetic.</p><p>—</p><p>He was staring at his PC, hopefully searching for something that would entertain him, or maybe simply distract him from what was on his mind, but ended up on discord, staring at the countless new messages that keep on popping up with an irritating “badum” sound. Most messages he would never end up checking, even when he was not like this. Others came from some of his dearest friends — those he remembered seeing in his dream — like Wilbur, Quackity, Karl, Sapnap, and Dream. </p><p>Dream.</p><p>He brought his hands to click on his conversation with Sapnap, deciding against looking at what Dream had sent him. He was in no shape to handle anything related to Dream.</p><p>Sapnap [5 days ago]<br/>Hey gogy! I wanted to check on u because u havent been showing up to streams lately<br/>Is there anything I can help u w/?<br/>Lemme know if u need help<br/>Ill always be here you know<br/>So will all of us<br/>:]<br/>Sapnap [4 days ago]<br/>George?<br/>Reply if you see my messages alright bro<br/>We’re worried. </p><p>Sapnap [3 days ago]<br/>- - - Missed Call - - -<br/>George?<br/>Answer my call<br/>Answer my call<br/>Mf if I won’t even know if youre dead or smthing<br/>Answer me<br/>Or at least answer dream or karl or quackity or something</p><p>Sapnap [2 days ago]<br/>George<br/>Call me<br/>Or answer my calls<br/>Or answer anyone’s calls<br/>I just called your mom too<br/>- - - Missed Call - - -<br/>Answer me</p><p>Sapnap [1 day ago]<br/>I don’t know what to say other than we just want to know if youre alright</p><p>Sapnap [2 minutes ago]<br/>Please</p><p>—</p><p>He didn’t know anyone would care that much.</p><p>Surely enough he knew he had friends: he knew Sapnap was a good friend, his dearest friend he could always trust no matter what happened to the god damn world, but seeing Sapnap worry for him made his heart ache. </p><p>Almost like he didn’t deserve it. </p><p>No one needed to fuss over a stupid dream he had. No one needed to care. He imagined all of it, and all of it will be gone in a matter of days. </p><p>Ok maybe not days: weeks or months, but he will eventually get over it in a whim, and by then no one will ever find out what happened, and he would keep his feelings in a jar somewhere in his poor patchwork heart, just like how even the worst rains will dry up, leaving only a rainbow behind, the only signal of it ever existing.</p><p>Amid his tears, he still needed to respond to Sapnap, and by that matter, all his friends. </p><p>Maybe except for Dream, for now. </p><p>—</p><p>?????</p><p>“Dream,” The voice on the other end shouted a little too loudly for my speaker to handle. “He says he’s alright. He responded to my DMs. Did he respond to you?”</p><p>I immediately launched myself out of bed and climbed onto my chair, frantically searching through my PC before finally finding discord before clicking on it. The interface was spammed with messages of fans from the Merch Discord chat and other friends and the occasional coworker. </p><p>But.</p><p>“No, Sap,” I felt like having had all my air whipped out of my lungs. “He hasn’t.”</p><p>—</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0021"><h2>21. Wonderland pt.20</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>“I want to see Florida”</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I never thought I could reach 20th part on this novel bruh<br/>I’m surprised I kept on writing<br/>And I love every single bit of it :)))</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>After bringing himself to type in at least “I’m alright :) Thanks for checking. My wifi hasn’t been doing good and I decided going off the internet will be a good idea”, he leaned back onto his chair and closed his eyes. </p><p>He didn’t feel like crying again, though he spent time thinking over what everyone said to him. </p><p>Karl [5 days ago]<br/>Hey George!<br/>Big Q, Dream, Sapnap, Bad, and I are streaming Jackbox in like an hour. Text me if you wanna join :]<br/>Don’t feel pressured if you don’t!<br/>We just miss you :]</p><p>Quackity [3 days ago]<br/>Hey I know youre not, like, replying to people<br/>But I want you to know you can talk to me whenever you feel like alright<br/>It doesnt matter what time it is I am always open to talking<br/>I just want you to know that alright</p><p>Wilbur [3 days ago]<br/>George talk to me<br/>Youre not alright George<br/>If you don’t want to talk to me just tell me youre at least alive and feeding yourself</p><p>He had reassured them that at least he was alive. </p><p>But he knew he wasn’t… alright, just like what Wilbur said. </p><p>Not alright. </p><p>—</p><p>It has been two hours since he texted his friends. Most of them replied with warm messages, telling him that, it’s alright to take a break, and glad that he replied. He still haven’t had the courage to look at Dream’s messages yet, and he didn’t feel like doing so in a while. </p><p>He had decided to turn on his phone too, leaving it lying there on his counter while he gently rocked himself in his chair, listening to his cat’s purrs and the rain outside — still going. </p><p>Dream’s warm touches and soft cheeks, living in his mind rent free. </p><p>He shook his head violently in hope to get them out. </p><p>Dream’s calloused hands and his soft smiles. </p><p>He growled, jumping a little from the sound he just made. </p><p>“Get out of my head.” </p><p>A red bubble popped on his PC screen. </p><p>“Dream [5 seconds ago]<br/>Hey, I heard you texted everyone, I just…"</p><p>The notification didn’t show much else, yet he didn’t bother to check. Instead, he went straight to bed, disregarding the fact that it was four in the afternoon, and fell asleep immediately, yearning for another dream that made him feel like being home. </p><p>—</p><p>?????</p><p>“Sapnap,” I mumbled into the phone. “Are you sure he replied to…”</p><p>“Yeah,” Sapnap’s voice sounded more certain than he had ever been. “I can even show you screenshots if you really needed them, but I doubt you think I’d lie.” </p><p>I nodded, even knowing how Sapnap couldn’t really see. “I just don’t understand why he would suddenly disappear, and when he comes back and text everyone but me.” </p><p>It was true — it didn’t make sense — unless George was lying, which didn’t make sense either. </p><p>“I don’t know either, bro,” Sapnap whispered. “I’m sure he’ll get to you soon. Maybe his discord glitched out or something.” </p><p>“I tried texting him on… like messages… and snapchatting him.” I gave a useless protest. </p><p>“Just,” Sapnap sighed. “Don’t worry about it alright? I’m sure George’s fine, and in the meanwhile you can wait for a little longer, right?” </p><p>“Mmhmm,” I hummed, pondering about what I had dreamt about. And then it suddenly clicked: filled in the last piece of the puzzle with a “snap.” </p><p>“Sapnap,” I blurted. The man on the other side of the phone hummed, clearly surprised by my sudden tone. </p><p>“Do you believe in, um, magic?” </p><p>—</p><p>Sapnap [1 minute ago]<br/>Hey<br/>Do you have time to talk?</p><p>GeorgeNotFound [1 minute ago]<br/>A little<br/>I suppose<br/>Im tired</p><p>Sapnap [1 minute ago]<br/>No prob bro<br/>Can we call? </p><p>GeorgeNotFound [30 seconds ago]<br/>Ya</p><p>—</p><p>“Hey,” Sapnap’s voice softer than he usually was. “Haven’t talked to you in a while, George. How are you?” It was more than a question but less of a demand. </p><p>“I’m sorry for worrying you guys.” He managed to say without making his voice sound… broken.</p><p>“It’s fine. We’re all happy to know that you didn’t, you know, kill yourself or something,” Sapnap huffed. It was meant to be a joke, but the tone suggested a little otherwise. </p><p>“Sorry.”</p><p>“Don’t apologize for it. I just, I just wanted to talk to you about, you know, your disappearance. Don’t fell pressurized to answer or anything, you can always not answer my questions,” Sapnap started to rant a bit, which was almost atypical of Sapnap’s. “But I want to get straight to the point here,” </p><p>“If you’re asking me a question then just ask it,” He blurted and then breathed in, not aware of his harsh tone at the start. “I don’t…” </p><p>“So I was about to ask,” Sapnap sighed. “Your internet didn’t really snap, did it?”</p><p>He didn’t know what to answer. </p><p>“I take that as a yes,” Sapnap remarked. “Look, I know you’re not feeling too well, so I want to be straight to the point, is that alright?”“I don’t know what you mean but sure.” He mumbled. </p><p>Sapnap audibly sighed. “Man, I just, I was talking to Dream, like,”</p><p>He knew what Sapnap was going to say. </p><p>“Just,” Sapnap was choking on his words a little. “He’s also worried about you, alright. I suggest talking to him soon.”</p><p>“Mmhmm.” He couldn’t bring himself to say more than just that. Sapnap sighed on the other side before hanging up, beeping in the silence. </p><p>—</p><p>?????</p><p>“Man I don’t know,” Sapnap groaned. “I guess just give him time, alright. I still don’t want to believe whatever you said — but I guess we’ll find out, soon.” </p><p>“Thank you,” I tried breathing in and out again. </p><p>—</p><p>He fell asleep on his windowsill, unaware of the time of day. He had been sleeping way to much, not that he cared profusely, just that he needed a break from constantly searching his mind for dreams he couldn’t reach. </p><p>Most importantly of all, he needed more food. </p><p>There was nothing home, unless he wanted to eat a bar of soap or his toothbrush. </p><p>He groaned and grabbed a hoodie he had tossed onto the ground some time back in the week and threw it on himself. It smelled like the rain. The hoodie was black, dark grey at least, and was absolutely oversized, which he liked. He chose to ignore how his waist was getting thinner, nor how his arms are getting weaker, blaming them completely on how he didn’t manage to eat much in the past few days. </p><p>He grabbed his phone and stuffed it into his pocked and headed outside, amid the rain.</p><p>—</p><p>?????</p><p>Dream [1 second ago]<br/>Hey George<br/>I love you.</p><p>—</p><p>He auto-piloted through the supermarket, barely paying attention to what he was picking up. </p><p>Frozen food, mostly, and crisps, coke and Gatorade, unhealthy shit, he didn’t care. </p><p>He paid and left the place as soon as possible, craving the comfort of his bed and his chair. </p><p>He just wanted to hold onto a pillow. </p><p>He lunged whatever he was holding onto the table, nonchalantly throwing the frozen stuff into the freezer, and walked back to his room with a bag of lays original crisps under his arm. </p><p>He barely made a sound when he walked — maybe it’s because of the carpet that sounded like it was purposefully muffling his sounds, choking him, killing him from the inside. <br/>Shaking the thought off from his head, he sat back down again, this time scrolling through the messages Sapnap and Wilbur sent him while taking hellishly small bites from the snack. </p><p>He froze. </p><p>Dream [21 minutes ago]<br/>I love you.</p><p>He knew Dream didn’t mean it that way, but the mere look from it made his heart crack open again, and all his ways of trying to forget the memories, store them away somewhere distant, suddenly became futile as all of the memories gushed out like an untreated wound, hurting, paining, yet loving somehow. He didn’t cry, like he would twelve hours ago, when he cried himself awake from a nap he didn’t even know what hour in the day — or in the night. </p><p>Maybe talking to Dream will make it better, or maybe it’ll just make everything worse. </p><p>But it was worth a try. </p><p>GeorgeNotFound [3 seconds ago]<br/>Hey Im sorry for worrying you :)<br/>Didn’t mean to ignore you on purpose I promise</p><p>He took a deep breath and calmed himself down. Somehow his heart didn’t race; somehow, when he texted Dream, even though the memories did resurface, they didn’t take over him like the shadows. </p><p>At the thought of the shadows he instantly lifted his hoodie to stare at his waist, only to find nothing on his skin. He sighed with a mixture of relief and sadness, knowing that it was a clear symbol of him being in the dream, of a part of him wanting him to stay. </p><p>Dream [10 seconds ago]<br/>No worries georgie<br/>As long as ik youre fine </p><p>GeorgeNotFound [3 seconds ago]<br/>I won’t jump to the I’m fine bit<br/>But I’m fine :)</p><p>He didn’t know why he said the first line, but it was too late to take it back. Dream saw it anyways. </p><p>Dream [13 seconds ago]<br/>Care to elaborate?</p><p>GeorgeNotFound [5 seconds ago]<br/>You won’t understand<br/>Trust me its not that big of a deal</p><p>He wasn’t sure if he was ready to tell Dream, especially when it’s all a stupid, stupid dream. </p><p>Dream [10 seconds ago]<br/>I probably will<br/>If you want to tell me<br/>won’t push tho</p><p>He gulped at the sign of that. </p><p>GeorgeNotFound [2 seconds ago]<br/>Oh um yeah on that</p><p>He knew he probably shouldn’t cross the line. </p><p>Dream [10 seconds ago]<br/>Its alright<br/>Take your time georgie :)</p><p>He knew it was probably going to be a bad idea. </p><p>GeorgeNotFound [5 seconds ago]<br/>I know this is sudden<br/>But if its alright with you</p><p>Dream [3 seconds ago]<br/>yeah?</p><p>GeorgeNotFound [1 second ago]<br/>Is it ok if I visit you?<br/>Like, in a few days or a week or something?<br/>I want to see Florida.</p><p>—</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0022"><h2>22. Wonderland pt.21</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>He goes to Florida :)</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Next chapter will be a wrap up :)</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>?????</p><p>“And he doesn’t tell me anything else,” I mumbled. “Just coming to Florida.” </p><p>“So you’re asking me to go too?” Sapnap, on the other side of the phone, said. </p><p>“I asked him if he wants you there too and he said yes in all caps.” I said, not knowing Sapnap’s stand. </p><p>“When will he be there?”</p><p>“A week from now. I want you to come before him, if you know what I mean.” </p><p>“Dude, you’re lucky I have nothing on schedule.” Sapnap sighed. </p><p>“I bought you a ticked for 4 days from now. 2pm your time.” I pulled up a screenshot and sent it through discord. </p><p>Sapnap didn’t sound too defeated. “Fine. I’ll go.”</p><p>—</p><p>He didn’t know why he said that. </p><p>—</p><p>A week past too quickly for his liking, and soon he found himself on a cab with a small, pitiful luggage and a bag with his laptop and some snacks as well as his passport and his visa he somehow managed to get quicker than he had ever imagined. </p><p>“Why are you traveling amid a pandemic?” He remember the guy asking him over video. </p><p>“I… I need to visit a family member.” He half-lied. Dream was a friend, although his dream obviously wanted him to be something else. </p><p>The man pondered over it for a while before speaking again. “I understand.”</p><p>He doesn’t know what the man actually understood, but he decided it was not the time to prod. The man ended the interview shortly after the conversation, which he assumed it was because he gave the “right” answers. </p><p>As long as he got the visa, he was fine. <br/>George looked down to his phone that just lit up from an incoming message, turned it on, and scrolled through discord. </p><p>Dream [1 minute ago]<br/>You alright?</p><p>He sighed with a smile, knowing what Dream was inferring at. </p><p>GeorgeNotFound [30 seconds ago]<br/>I am<br/>On the cab rn. See you in less than half a day</p><p>It was nine in the morning. His plane doesn’t take off in another one and a half hours or so, and he wouldn’t see Dream in another eight or nine hours. It is safe to say that it wasn’t the time for him to be nervous just yet, though that thought didn’t sit in, and he found himself clutching onto his pants, fingers and knuckles white. </p><p>“Hey kid, where are you going?” The driver suddenly spoke up. He jumped slightly in his seat, confined by his seatbelt, not knowing what to answer. </p><p>“Um, the US,” He stuttered. “To see a, a friend.” </p><p>That was completely true. </p><p>Truer than he would like it to be. </p><p>“It doesn’t look like it’s just that, boy,” The driver cooed, “If you want to make someone else believe it you’ve gotta make yourself believe in first.” The driver has a point, a definitive one, something he actually hasn’t thought over himself, because he doesn’t know how to believe in it either. </p><p>He nodded. </p><p>“So tell me boy, what are you doing in the US?” </p><p>“I mean,” He muttered. “They’re still a friend, for now.” </p><p>The driver hummed for a minute straight. </p><p>“Good luck kid. I hope you get what you want.” The driver purred and pulled over, and then they were there, at the airport. He thanked the driver and went, taking a deep breathe through his mask and passed through the doors. </p><p>—</p><p>?????</p><p>GeorgeNotFound [1 minute ago]<br/>I just boarded<br/>I’m going to have to turn this off<br/>I’ll text you when I get there<br/>See you then</p><p>He hasn’t even seen my face. He wouldn’t know what I look like, and he insisted that I didn’t show him, saying that it’ll be better if it was kept a mystery until we meet, and he insisted that I wear a mask at all times, even in the car, insisting that it’ll be better if he could see me actually, face to face, all at once. </p><p>Somehow, I could figure out the reason why.</p><p>“Hey Dream,” Sapnap’s voice came from the other side of the door. I hummed and he pushed the door open, revealing him in his casual wear, holding a glass of water and a miniature sandwich. “You need to rest before you pick him up. Eat and sleep.” </p><p>I rolled my eyes. “Thank you mom, I appreciate it.” Sapnap laid whatever he was holding onto the table. </p><p>“Oh yeah,” Sapnap said. “And I wish you good luck, on whatever you have to say. Or whatever he has to say, I guess.” </p><p>—</p><p>He didn’t fall asleep. </p><p>At least it didn’t feel like he was. </p><p>His mind decided that playing the dream over and over again like a stupid child’s slideshow playing the same picture without knowing.</p><p>It was annoying, and even more annoying with the sound of engines and children crying. He was tempted to shout at them, yell at them to shut up, but it would be stupid, just proving to others that he’s just an immature child too. </p><p>He doesn’t want that.</p><p>—</p><p>He’s been looping Heatwaves for too long now. </p><p>He didn’t think it was that good of a song, and he only played it over and over again because it reminds him of the beach in the fan fiction, reminds him of Dream’s imaginary feelings that he knew never existed, and never will. </p><p>The thought of that made him cringe. </p><p>Yet he was still trying to go somewhere, he was still trying to go to Florida, to see the Dream he has always wanted to see. </p><p>Maybe that’s why he’s clinging onto the song. </p><p>Maybe that’s why he’s been thinking about it all day, all night, through his daydreams and nightmares. </p><p>Maybe that’s his only hope. </p><p>And he clung onto it. </p><p>—</p><p>He saw Dream in the entrance of gate 2. </p><p>He smiled, even knowing Dream couldn’t make out his expressions through the white, plastic mask. Dream waved back, squinting his eyes, smiling. </p><p>“Hey,” He said, weaker than he wanted. “I’m sorry for the rushed decision but I’m glad that you showed up.” </p><p>“Don’t worry about it,” Dream helped him put his luggage in the trunk. “I always wanted you to visit too.” </p><p>He didn’t know what Dream meant. Maybe he was overthinking. </p><p>He was definitely overthinking. </p><p>Maybe he was just tired. </p><p>“Is Sapnap home?” He found himself asking when Dream started the car. </p><p>“Mmhmm. I think he’s sleeping though.” Dream hummed. </p><p>“His voice sounds better when he’s not through the phone.” He thought to himself. </p><p>The Dream, standing in front of him, is as tall as he had imagined in his dream. He wondered how he got that accurate in his dream, because he was sure he had never seen a man with the same build. </p><p>“George?” He heard Dream say, cutting him off from his train of thought. He shook his head slightly. </p><p>“What?”</p><p>Dream pointed towards the middle of his eyes. “You were staring, at me.” </p><p>His face flushed red. That wasn’t what he wanted to do. </p><p>“Oh, I am so sorry I didn’t mean to-” he scrambled. </p><p>“No no no. It’s completely fine,” Dream turned back to face the road. “It doesn’t bother me, at all, just so you know.” </p><p>The rest of the ride stayed completely quiet, more quiet than he would’ve liked. </p><p>When they arrived at Dream’s house, Sapnap came up to greet them. He smiled and hugged the Texan, gratefully knowing that someone will be there if he fucks up.</p><p>—</p><p>?????</p><p>His reaction matches my suspicion. </p><p>He definitely has something on mind, and Sapnap knows what I mean too. When we got home, he immediately asked if we had anything on schedule, and when we said “no” he then said he was going to bed and locked himself in his room. </p><p>And when I sneaked to his door, I heard his voice. </p><p>He was sobbing, at least crying and hiccuping one in a while. </p><p>And my hand was resting on the doorknob before I realized that his door was locked. </p><p>Maybe he just needed some time. </p><p>—</p><p>It was a sorry sight, but he couldn’t hold it back. </p><p>Dream had tore his mask off the minute he stepped in, and it revealed a face too similar to what he saw back a month ago. Tall nose, freckles dotting his face like stars, his lips resting perfectly on his chin, and his eyes — beautifully shining brighter than anything he had seen in a while. </p><p>There was a knot tied to his heart, and he didn’t know how to deal with it, so he just cried and cried. </p><p>He didn’t bother muffling himself when he heard footsteps with socks on the outside of his door, knowing that he could just tell them he was just hiccuping or something. Surely he would get away with it. </p><p>Surely.</p>
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<a name="section0023"><h2>23. Wonderland pt.22</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Final chapter?? I’m done with this???<br/>*pats myself intensely on the back*</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Somehow waking up with puffy eyes was more embarrassing when he was in his best friend’s, and his crush’s, as he will finally admit it to himself after crying to sleep three times during the past, 12 hours or so, house with his other best friend living in the room  directly to his right. </p><p>He was more ready to talk about it than he was during the previous day, which was good, but he still didn’t feel like going outside and telling Dream what he had in mind, or telling Sapnap, really, either. </p><p>Dream probably wasn’t awake yet, yet he didn’t think he was disgusting enough to have to use the shower — though he probably should — nor hungry enough to have to make himself something in the kitchen. He pulled out a small bag of crisps he had brought all the way from Britain and munched on them instead. </p><p>He heard footsteps outside, and flinched, before realizing that it was Patches, head-butting the outside of the door. He relaxed and unlocked, opening the door to let the kitten in. </p><p>“Are you hungry, Patches?” He whispered when he stroked her head with the back of his hand, avoiding the grease from the crisps he was just eating. Patches purred and licked his hand, possibly agreeing to whatever he had said. </p><p>He decided to prop himself up and search the house for food for the poor cat, maybe regretting the decision later but it didn’t really matter. He took a turn right and entered the living room, and through his distant memories of where the cat bowl was, he rummaged the cabinet besides it and found a cat treat. </p><p>“Here you go, buddy.” He quickly opened it and held it in front of Patches. To his surprise, the cat didn’t eat it immediately, but stared at him for a few seconds, stood up on her legs, and booped him on the nose with hers. </p><p>“Mrrp?” Patches seemed to ask before she started eating. </p><p>“Mmhmm smart girl,” He whispered. “I guess I am thinking to much and you just want to give me a break, right? Smart girl.” He silently sat on the carpet as he watched the cat lapping at the treat bits by bits, savoring the time with a comforting creature like her. </p><p>“I don’t know how to make your wet food though,” He mumbled to Patches who was rapping up her treat. “You have to ask Dream for that, I’m afraid. I’ll be heading back, and if you want to come with me-”</p><p>“I’m right here.” A voice interrupted his little conversation with Patches. He lifted his head up and saw the dirty blonde, Dream, leaning against the doorframe, well dressed, loose strands of hair still sticking up but barely affects his general appearance. </p><p>He was frightened, for only a bit, before he remembered that this was in real life, not on a computer screen, not in his phone, and definitely not in his dream. </p><p>“Oh good morning Dream,” He smiled as sweetly as he could. “How are you?”</p><p>Dream only smiled faintly. </p><p>“Good, how was your night of sleep?” </p><p>He shrugged casually, desperately hoping, on the inside, that Dream didn’t notice anything wrong with him, which was borderline impossible, considering his eyes were literally laced with veins, a sign that he definitely did not sleep well. “It was alright. I guess I was just really tired. Sorry for not being up last night with you guys.” He said as he slowly stood up, gaining a temporary headache. Patches, at this point, was no longer to be found. </p><p>“It doesn’t look like you slept plenty well,” Dream remarked. </p><p>“Shit.” He thought to himself. </p><p>“But I guess jet lag does that to people sometimes. I won’t judge.” </p><p>He sighed of relief on the inside. </p><p>“Do you need anything?” Dream asked again. </p><p>“I don’t think so,” He shrugged again. “I might need a shower later but that’s for later, I guess.” </p><p>Dream stood up straight and took two quick steps closer to him. He backed up a little, heel hitting a wall behind him, forcing him to stop. He didn’t mean to back off.</p><p>Dream raised a brow at him, but decided not to comment. </p><p>“Good, because I have a few things I want to talk about. Do you want to sit on the table?” </p><p>—</p><p>His chair literally felt like a cactus, prickling at his skin, rising from the ground inch by inch before he passes out or gets pinned onto the ceiling like a hopeless little doll. </p><p>Dream was sitting to his front-right, northeast direction, with both hands on the table like a counselor waiting to talk to a twelve year old caught for putting a fly into the teacher’s mug. </p><p>He tried to not look nervous, but his fingers, gripping tight to his pajama pants, certainly was the thing that gave him away. </p><p>“Um,” Dream started, awkwardly. “If you don’t want to talk to me now we can always talk later, I just wanted to get stuff out of the way, so, you know, you can enjoy the stay here.” </p><p>Dream was right. </p><p>“No, it’s, it’s alright,” He shook his head. “I just didn’t think you’d be bringing this up so soon,” He inferred that Dream wanted to talk about how he had basically ignored everyone for a concerning period of time and how he hasn’t been showing up to streams, on late night calls, or even tweeting, or sending messages on discord. “Honestly I just want to say I’m sorry for ignoring you-”</p><p>“No George,” Dream cut him off. “Not that.” </p><p>He flinched. </p><p>“I know perfectly why you disappeared,” Dream took a deep breathe in. </p><p>“No you don’t.” He unintentionally snapped, but he thought it was true. Dream should’ve never known about a dream that he had, and probably shouldn’t know that he had feelings for Dream, if not before then now he definitely did. Dream didn’t know. </p><p>“I do, George, listen to me.” Dream tried to soothe him by placing his hand on George’s back, but was swatted to the side in midair. </p><p>“You don’t Dream,” George started breathing faster than he would like. Tears formed on the corners of his eyes, and within milliseconds the steaming liquid was rolling down his cheeks. “You will never Dream.” Dream opened his mouth to say something. </p><p>“I know you care for me, which I thank you for, but, and I assure you this has nothing to do with you, or maybe it does, I don’t really know now, but it’s all my fault, I was imagining things, I was out of my mind for a while, maybe I should see an actual doctor, maybe I should take medication or something I don’t know. I don’t see why you will know and-” His ramble was cut off instantly by a large hug. </p><p>“Hush George,” Dream whispered. “Calm down — and it’s not just you. It’s not your fault George.”“It is.” He whimpered, hiding his eyes in Dream’s nape, unintentionally soaking his lime green — yellow to his eyes — hoodie in tears. </p><p>“George,” Dream whispered. “I told you to wake up, it’s fine. I know. I know all of it.”</p><p>And for that moment he felt euphoria. </p><p>—</p>
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<a name="section0024"><h2>24. Wonderland pt.Bonus</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Bonus chapter because I didn’t want it to end there hehe</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>He was careful not to fall back into a dream again, and he promised himself he’d do everything he could to help himself stay awake. </p><p>He spent that morning with Dream, on Dream’s queen sized bed, lying in the dirty blonde’s arms like he had, scratch that, they had in the wondrous dream they shared. </p><p>“Tell me about what you remember.” He whispered, eyes closed, focused on burying his face in Dream’s chest, inhaling the scent of his lavender detergent. </p><p>“About the dream?” Dream answered, kissing the brunette’s hair fondly. </p><p>“Yeah. I just can’t believe, you know, we actually had the same dream.” </p><p>Dream turned over, momentarily leaving George’s face in the cold, fetched something from the counter drawer and turned back, putting the thing in his hands in the air, under the morning sun. </p><p>He turned to look at it too.</p><p>“This reminds me that it’s real,” Dream said, holding George in his other arm, holding onto his arm as if he would lose him somehow again. “And when you refused to talk to me I just knew you were there too — and now you’re here… fuck.” Dream cursed. </p><p>“What’s wrong?” His eyes widened. <br/>“I just suddenly remembered that you’ll have to go back — when’s your ticket?” </p><p>He felt himself blush. “I don’t have one yet. I just thought I’d order a ticket when I go back, depending on if I messed up or not.” </p><p>“Fair enough,” Dream said, cradling George in his arms again. “Do you want to stay for a lil’ longer? Or um, do you want to, move in?”</p><p>He smiled, even though Dream probably couldn’t see. “I might,” He teased. “I have a dog and a cat and myself to feed, and I can’t get my setup here.” </p><p>“I can buy you one.” Dream asserted, a little too quickly than he had originally expected. </p><p>“Wait, wait,” He shuffled, pulling back to look Dream directly in the face. “I didn’t actually mean that. I mean, if you really want me here, I will be more than happy to move. And wait before that,” He pulled Dream up to sit on top of Dream’s lap. </p><p>“What?” Dream smiled, putting his hands on George’s hip, steadying him. </p><p>“Dream, Clay actually, if you don’t mind. Before I regret everything I just said, will you be my boyfriend?” </p><p>The boy in front of him beamed of pure light, as if magic was actually a thing, in hindsight it might as well be, as he leaned in to kiss George on the lips, slightly, only to make a statement, to answer his question. </p><p>“Yes of course,” Dream mumbled. “I will, just like last time, and all the times before in dreams that just belong to me.” </p><p>“Me too.” He whispered back as he leaned in, tasting the blonde’s lips on his own, soft, like a fruity sponge; breathing in Dream’s scent, little by little, like a hummingbird drinking the nectar of a new flower, savoring the flavor of the bud of something so unfamiliar and familiar at the same time. </p><p>“I love you.” Dream said through the breaks in their small kisses. </p><p>“I’ve been loving you.” He replied, leaning in to kiss Dream again, and Dream nudged his head, taking the kiss softly and cutely, squeezing his hips to stabilize him, allowing him to prop himself up a little so he could kiss the blond from the top. </p><p>Sunshine, kisses, mornings, and he was going to be there again and again, and when he leaves, he knew that he was going to be back, again, every time. </p><p>—</p><p>Dream:</p><p>Dear Diary,</p><p>Sapnap wasn’t too surprised when he knocked on my door and opened to see George sleeping on my bed, me sitting besides him, gently stroking his hair. </p><p>“So this happened,” Sapnap remarked. “What are you planning to do next?” </p><p>I told him how I invited him to live with me and how he said he was going to go back in 2 weeks, ship his stuff here and take his pets to his family and live here with me, for as long as he wanted, until further problems or until he didn’t love me anymore. </p><p>He replied to what I said with “I don’t think I would ever, Clay.” And I told him the same thing too. </p><p>Sapnap sat down on my gaming chair, crossing his legs and leaned back. </p><p>“I am genuinely happy for you guys, and, just so you know, I will always be your most trustworthy friend, and if you ever need me I will be right here.” Sapnap said. I thank him for the greatest there: I have always.</p><p>—</p><p>He ate breakfast at ten. Dream had left him to make pancakes, and he ate gratefully under the gaze of his friend and his now-partner. </p><p>“You know, and just so you know, please don’t ignore any of us again. You know we’re here to help.” Sapnap said, crossing his arms and sitting on the kitchen counter. Dream nodded in agreement. </p><p>He swallowed whatever was in his mouth. Dream leaned over to wipe a splotch of cream away from the side of his mouth.</p><p>“It won’t happen again, I swear on behalf of my life,” George said with a hand in the air as if he was in church or in court. “And plus, there’s no reason for me to do that ever again. Wouldn’t ever have a dream like that also.” </p><p>Sapnap huffed at that comment. “Eww, idiots in love. I hope I have something that romantic too.” </p><p>“You will,” Dream chuckled. “We are just one step ahead of you, and that’s it, nothing more than that.” </p><p>He then spent more nights on Dream’s bed, spending the rest of the time when he was awake going through social media, going outside to parks with Dream, buying groceries, spending precious time with Patches, who apparently thought he was already a family member. </p><p>When he got ready to leave to come back to Florida a month later, he hugged Sapnap goodbye and kissed Dream in the airport parking lot, and despite knowing he’d come back soon, he still missed his blonde boyfriend as soon as he turned to the gates. </p><p>And a month felt like forever. </p><p>But he still had forever, with someone who wanted to spend forever with him too. </p><p>—</p><p>Years later they would still think back to wonderland and to the land that brought them together.</p><p>END<br/>—</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thanks for reading! I appreciate every single piece of criticism or other comments! Feel free to give me more ideas to write about :’)<br/>I love them so much btw...</p></blockquote></div></div>
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